"Please make your way to the middle." the Emperor motioned, his eyes were inviting and lively, which eased the anxious sparks in me.
With Guan Shu helping me up, I hesitantly stepped to the center. Full attention was on me now. The Empress furrowed her eyebrows as she leaned forward to study the Emperor's face, but he didn't seem to notice her distress. As I kneeled, the Emperor quickly spoke.
"You may rise," he said, then turning to the Empress and then to the front. "As you all know, Ying Yue has swayed many for her excellent skills—"
"What are you trying to say, Your Majesty?" the Empress muttered under her breath, the grin she plastered on was not at all convincing as she gripped the arms of her throne tightly.
Chang Ying held her breath as we made eye contact. The earrings dangling from her ears were moving as she nodded at me. I chewed my bottom lip as the Empress waited for the response from her husband.
The Emperor curled his lips into a form of a smile. "I am saying, Ying Yue's courage and excellency should be modelled."
"Yes, we should all follow Noble Consort Han's integrity." the Empress nodded, scanning the women before looking at me.
"Yes, Empress." they all said in unison, in hopes of not angering her even more.
"Which is why I want to ask you, Empress," the Emperor turned to look at her. They both faced each other and I could already feel the tension. I should've pretended to be sick this morning. I felt like I was homewrecking. "Will you allow her to gain the title of 'Imperial Noble Consort'?"
I almost gasped at the boldness and the immediacy of the Emperor's words. 'Madame Ying Yue' struck me as something abnormal. Once Dong Mei was out of the picture, Noble Consorts were practically killing each other for the title of 'Imperial Noble Consort.' To replace Dong Mei, was something that I never wanted to do, but I did. I would leave the small chambers and have my own estate to myself.
That was hard to grasp.
The responsibilities would lengthen, and I'm not ready to reach that level of title. But, I would accept this title in a heartbeat. I tried my best not to anger the Empress, but there was nothing else I could do in a situation like this. If I lay low and suck up to her, maybe she'll leave me to be.
Then again, what's the fun in that?
Dong Mei's death was unimaginable, but would it be too harsh to say I was glad she's gone? I knew she was just as wicked as the Empress. But I didn't hate her as much because she's never gone crazy on me and tried to get me executed. The craving for this title that I've been submerging in my subconscious has finally unleashed, and I was waiting for my benefits like a cat waiting for a bird to approach.
"I-I... Your Majesty," the Empress stammered, uncomfortable chuckling as she avoided my eyes. "She... She hasn't given you a child yet... Wouldn't it be too soon?"
"Nonsense," the Emperor shook his head. "She'd be a great role model for the harem, and she's done plenty of duties to prove her worth. Empress, are you opposed to this idea?"
He stared at her as she struggled to make her choice. She kept the heartful grin on her face but her eyes contradicted herself. The Empress shook her head slowly. I watched her synthetic burst of uncomfortable flattery dim away as she faced me. My apologetic smile when we made eye contact, was genuine.
I understood. She deserved to have an apprehensive approach. It would be devastating to lose the 'Empress' title, and I was someone she should be watching closely. My empathy was too strong. I ended up pitying the Empress, which I shouldn't.
She framed me for murder and scapegoated my maid.
The Emperor cleared his throat. "I've talked to Mother about it. She suggests that it is up to you to choose."
"Where is the Empress Dowager? Maybe I have—" the Empress began, but stopped herself as she ran her eyes over us. We all stared at her. The Emperor didn't react, nor blink.
It was easy to see that she felt pressured by the Emperor.
"Step forward to receive your title," the Empress instructed, her eyes widened at the eunuch in front of her. She took the scroll from the eunuch's tray. "By the Imperial decree of the Emperor, her supremacy earns her the title of 'Imperial Noble Consort'."
The Emperor had this decree stored somewhere. He planned it. He knew the Empress would oblige to his demands... Maybe he wasn't so whipped for her. He's dumb, but not too whipped.
"Prepare her new attire and her maids," the Emperor spoke to the eunuch beside him. "She will reside in the Palace of Eternal Spring."
"Yes, Your Majesty." the eunuch bowed, hurriedly speeding off.
Niu Lin was already staring daggers at me. It was refreshing to know that I won't be harassed any longer by her. I was ahead of the game while only being here for less than a year. The Emperor might have pitied me and titled me 'Madame Ying Yue' for redemption. Nevertheless, I could never read what he does. He was a mystery within a mystery.
It may take time for him to regain my trust and adoration back, but he was a good man to still wait for me. I would never consider him as a lover. The Emperor was gullible and cannot make proper judgements if his life depended on it.
He seemed to have handled battles and court affairs with intellect and strategy, but he was oblivious to the Empress's wickedness and schemes.
My estate was grand. It was beautifully polished and cleaned, and not dirty and dusty like the Cold Palace. Hua Er had the biggest smile on her face. It seemed to me that she was happier than I was.
"Would you like to change your attire, Your Grace?" Hua Er mischievously teased, raising an eyebrow and slyly smiling at me.
I chuckled. "Ah, Hua Er, watch your tongue!"
"No, I shall not! You mesmerized His Majesty to the point where you are an Imperial Noble Consort!" Hua Er squealed like a fangirling middle school girl. She hit me gently with her hanfu sleeves, as she closed her eyes tightly with the ends of her grin touching the apples of her cheeks.
As I settled down on the throne-like seating, I laughed loudly at Hua Er's excitement. My legs were crossed elegantly. It looked like a sofa, but it wasn't as comfortable as a sofa. The chair was hard, barely bouncy.
I tried to bounce on the seat but it hurt my bottom.
"Madame Ying Yue." I heard an unfamiliar voice coming into the room.
My immediate reaction was to sit up stiffly with a brush in my hand as if I was doing anything. This palace was fairly new to me. There were so many things to explore, that I didn't know where to start!
Four maids, that were mine, rushed to the side of me and revealed the two maids kneeling to bow. I didn't recognize any of them. They looked nervous to greet me, and I would be too. I chose to be reassuring. I was supposed to have eight maids, but like always, I feel like too many maids were overbearing to me.
"You are my new maids, I suppose?" I asked, carefully holding the cup of tea on the tray out in front of me.
"We are here to serve you." the left one said.
"We hope that we do our duties well and satisfy your needs, Your Grace." the right one looked up and gave me a nod.
I put the cup down after taking a long sip. "You may rise."
They both rose sharply, straightening their backs. I tilted my head to examine them. As soon as I opened my mouth to ask for their names, I closed my mouth shut.
I let my guard down for Chen Xi, and I was put into the Cold Palace. From now on, I will not be establishing any connection with them. Snoopy, Guan Shu, Fen Ai are the only maids that I will trust.
"Very well," I rose from the seat and walked down, Snoopy held my arm gently as I stood in front of them. "His Majesty mentioned new attire. I would like to take a stroll in them, if you don't mind?"
The two maids looked at each other in confusion.
Was I too polite?
"Well?" I bent my head and raised my eyebrows for an answer.
"Oh yes, Your Grace!" the right maid shot up.
I did refuse to establish a connection with the new maids, but it wouldn't hurt to have them like me. After all, Madame Ying Yue is a kind, virtuous woman. I smiled to myself. But the sudden thought of Dong Mei's father on his knees, angrily insulting the Emperor, caused me to face my reality.
The guilt of being an accomplice to Li Mei's murder made me shiver. I realised that I've never cared as much as I should, and this concerned me. I have become someone else. Someone far different. The modern society, where I was from, was comfortable and I never had to worry about my reputation or identity. Here, I still felt unsafe even while I lounged in my big bedroom. I decided that I would never let my guard down.
There were recent deaths because of the Empress's scheming, but the one that I've barely acknowledged was Rong Er's death. More guilt washed over me when I thought about him. I felt compelled to protect him at all costs, away from bad energy but I lost him. And because of that, I've lost Guan Shu as well. Although she tried to put up a happy front for all of us, there was still grief inside of her.
"I'll need to distinguish you two," I said, fetching into my old jewellery box.
I gave the two maids each a pin. One contained a plain blue butterfly pin and another a plain pink flower pin.
"Your Grace, we wouldn't dare take this!" one of the maids was shocked, still holding onto the pin in her hand.
"I insist." I smiled
"Thank you for your kindness, Your Grace!" the two maids chimed in unison.
I have established nicknames. Blue and Pink.
My eyes turned to the mirror, watching myself in the big reflection as my maids helped me put on a new, silky pink hanfu with gold embroideries. I raised the sleeves high, noticing the gold interior of the sleeves.
"This is so beautiful..." I whispered in awe as I admired my beauty.
"Yes, you look amazing, Madame Ying Yue." Pink cooed, she carefully adjusted the bottom of the attire.
Fen Ai spoke up. "Your Grace, I apologize for eavesdropping in Her Majesty's conversation, but she was whining to His Majesty about your title."
"Oh, really?" I popped an eyebrow up in amusement.
"Oh, yes! In the words of the Empress, 'You can't just let a low-born whore like her get this title in less than a year! She can't sing, she can't dance, she can't do anything! She's just a useless wooden beauty!'" Fen Ai imitated, mocking her exact gestures and facial expression.
I burst out laughing. I covered my mouth with my hand. "You do it so well! Her Majesty does sound like that!"
"Now your headpiece." Snoopy smiled at me through the reflection, as she finished with my hair. Even she was cracking up at Fen Ai's imitation.
I dipped my head down. Once I felt her put it on, I raised my head. Just in case, I shook my head gently to the left and to the right. "This won't fall, will it?"
"We made sure of that." Blue let out a soft chuckle as she stepped back to enhance my view.
Fen Ai continued, "Then, His Majesty spoke back, and he seemed so irritated by her. He lost his temper, Your Grace! He said, 'She has done very well in her duties and has respected me in many ways! Don't forget, Empress, you would have died if it wasn't for her to save you."
I widened my eyes at her words. My attempt to refrain from any smiling had failed and I couldn't help but snicker. Fen Ai's imitation of the Emperor was gold.
"Oh, Your Grace! I wasn't done," Fen Ai hastily said. She seemed so into this, that I let her continue. "He said, 'Imperial Noble Consort Han has many skills! Have you ever read her poetry? It was as if her writing was blessed by the gods! Have you seen her dance, Empress? Her movements are bright and powerful.'"
My ugly laughter was heard. Fen Ai's furrowed eyebrows and pouty lips made me laugh even louder. I shook my head as I was still recovering from Fen Ai's comic relief. She looked so passionate that I wanted more from her.
As I raised my chin up, I looked at Fen Ai with a grin. "You made that up, didn't you?"
"I dare not, Your Grace! I wouldn't dare to lie to you! Ask anyone here!" Fen Ai still had her eyes widened. Her hands were moving around to justify herself.
I looked at Guan Shu and she nodded, she was still recovering from Fen Ai's outburst. Immediately, I looked back at Fen Ai and gave her a suspicious look, still holding onto my smile. "You are so energetic today. I've never seen that side of you."
"Ah," Fen Ai shied away, then staring at the ground. "Your title makes me feel more confident about myself... Oh—That sounded stupid... Let me—"
"No, I like this side of you," I spoke softly as I looked up at her.
Her burst of energy almost reminded me of Chen Xi. I didn't want to say it. Saying it would give all of them the hint that I did miss her. But even without declaring it, I found Hua Er glancing at me thoughtfully.
She knew.
To push the lingering thoughts away, I positioned my face forward to stare at myself.
My hair was dazzled and glamoured with gold jewellery. The headpiece was essentially a huddle of golden flowers and leaves. In the middle were four leaves that were made from jade. There was a cute little butterfly slightly under the top of where my hair was put up. The two symmetrical dangling jewellery reached up to both of my eyebrows.
The finishing touch was two pins on each side of my hair, symmetrical to each other, dangling up to my shoulder. If Rong Er saw me again, he would've thought I was the Empress like last time.
I smiled warily to myself.
"Good job," I nodded.
"Your Grace, I forgot!" Snoopy exclaimed, rushing over towards me.
"What is it?" I looked down at her hands.
She was carrying a small red jewellery box. As she opened it, it was a new jade bangle, that had an inviting presence to it.
"This is one of your rewards," she spoke.
I gingerly took it out of the box and slipped my hand into it. I'd hate to wear these if I slept. They would be too uncomfortable, but if the Emperor wanted me to wear it, then I'd wear it. The jade bangle was one of the ingredients to the recipe to get out of here. If I break it by smashing it on a hard surface, I can use it.
"Thank you." I got up, and the rest had followed.
With my head held up high, the stroll was more relaxing than it ever was. The mere thought of running into Niu Lin or other women in the harem never crossed my mind. The only person that I would have been wary of is Chang Ying.
But I would never be. Chang Ying is someone who I can trust. We would run the harem together.
I made a mental note to visit her.
The spacious breeze passing me made me cautious about my hair. I shook my head a little. "This is quite heavy."
"Yes," Guan Shu said, laughing at my comment. "It is! But you'll get used to it!"
"I hope so," I mumbled as I slightly adjusted my headpiece.
Hua Er walked by my side, humming to herself a melody she loved to play on the guqin. She was smiling for once. When we went out for strolls, she would usually be observing the scenery with a frown on her face. I realised my rank did not only make me happy, but the rest of the people associated with me happy.
The thought of the Empress mocking Hua Er the first time we saw her, emerged. Hua Er wanted to be in the harem. I couldn't imagine her as a concubine. She was too nice and too innocent. I'm glad she wasn't, because if Niu Lin ran into her, it'd be game over for her. I questioned why Hua Er even had the enthusiasm to go with me.
I tried to ponder it, but I still couldn't think of any real reasons why she would want to be my lady-in-waiting. She didn't know that I would beg the Emperor to employ her mother, nor did she know that I would be a high-ranking consort.
"Hua Er, I have a question," I spoke, breaking the silence.
"Do ask." Hua Er replied, still aimlessly staring off into space.
I shifted my body slightly towards her and smiled. "I hope you don't mind me asking, but why were you willing to be my lady-in-waiting? I'm sure you didn't imagine me going this far."
"The failure of my application to live in the harem, saddened me, Your Grace," Hua Er whispered, sheepishly laughing at herself. "You are beautiful, and you held yourself up with such determination and poise—I knew you were a potential candidate. Your salary could support my mother and me."
Hua Er continued, "The Empress is far worse than you can imagine. She's better now, but before I went inside, there were rumours that she had a room that was used to interrogate the girls. They usually were new concubines moving into the harem."
"Back then, the Empress would be the first person to see the women, before His Majesty would. I remember so vividly—The Empress stepped over my fingers and it hurt so much, that I let out a small yelp."
"It's alright, Hua Er, you don't have to continue—" I replied, calmly putting my hand on her shoulder.
"No," Hua Er shook her head, avoiding me. "I have to say it, Ying Yue. I have to let it out. I've never told you this, and I've probably avoided this topic by telling small lies or by ignoring the topic..."
"Anyways, the Empress laughed in my face. I was so angry, I acted impulsively and grabbed her ankle and," Hua Er stopped to shake her head. She looked at me. "Oh, Ying Yue! It was traumatic! She ordered me to be flogged thirty times and kicked me out before I could even say a word to the Emperor!"
The pain in her voice was noticeable. I didn't know what to do or say, but I let her settle her thoughts silently before speaking. I didn't expect her to lash out on the Empress. She was someone that I thought wouldn't ever stomp on a spider. Maybe this explained the cooperative manner with authority.
My eyes wandered away from her face, and towards the soothing bridge to the left of us. "Hua Er, I'm so sorry for what happened..."
"It's fine. It's over. I can't change what has happened," Hua Er lowered her voice. "But, now that I am with you, I'm warning you to stay away from the Empress. You may just be one rank lower, but she's deranged."
"Hua Er, you underestimate me." I was noticeably irritated.
"I know you are capable of anything, but for your safety," Hua Er whispered. "And for mine as well, please don't irritate the Empress."
"Will do," I replied, drily.
The conversation had passed but I felt Hua Er still contemplating it in her head. I didn't bother her about it. The grass was beautifully green. It was good to take an evening stroll in the gardens and not be back in a room to embroider things.
We walked past Niu Lin and a few girls, gathering around and laughing at something. Niu Lin made eye contact with me and immediately bowed. Others followed suit.
"Greetings to Your Grace." they acknowledged in unison, dipping their head down.
"Congratulations on your promotion, Madame Ying Yue!" the same Noble Consort who was talking to me about roasted duck had said with a grin. We've had a weird bond. We've never talked or visited each other, but we both seemed to have an understanding of our situations. She's never been disrespectful.
It'd be rude to ask her for her name... I'll call her 'Roasted Duck.' It sounds mean, but I mean it with pure intentions.
I grinned. "Thank you! It is refreshing."
"Sometimes, I do miss Madame Dong Mei..." Niu Lin whispered, loud enough for me to hear, with a cunning look to her face.
Roasted Duck looked to her frantically, and so did the rest of them. One had nudged Niu Lin in the arm in hopes of shutting her up, but Niu Lin continued to shake her head in a mockingly sad expression. My casual walk towards her caused a fearful reaction from her.
It seems to me that she never learns.
"Say that again but louder," I ordered, still holding up a grin.
Niu Lin took a step back, but the smirk she was playing on her face told me that she was ready for more drama. "Your Grace, is it wrong for me to say that I missed the late Imperial Noble Consort?"
"You are using her name to mock me. You are using her name to derogate my title," I continued to face her, still coming closer towards her. "It is very disrespectful to Imperial Noble Consort Yang. How dare you speak of a deceased consort like that? How do you think His Majesty will react to your behaviour?"
The colour drained from her face as her eyes blinked rapidly. She gasped, looking to the other girls in hopes they would stand up for her. As she continued to back away from my frame, I interrogated her by walking forwards.
My maids rushed to step in, but I halted them by raising the palm of my hand.
"Your Grace, I apologize, it was very insensitive of me!" Niu Lin rushed to speak.
"Shall we punish her?" Pink asked, loudly.
I cleared my throat. "Only I can decide on discipline... I demand that Niu Lin kneels for thirty minutes outside of my estate."
"Madame Ying Yue, I didn't mean it! It was wrong for me to offend! I beg for your forgiveness!" Niu Lin immediately kneeled, bowing with the desperation that I've never seen come out of her. I know I should be guilty but I was satisfied.
I turned around and rushed back to my palace.
"You may all be dismissed," I gently put back the brush on the holder, watching my maids leave the room in an orderly fashion.
I waited for them to leave before turning to Hua Er. "Send him in. And make sure the maids don't come back until he leaves."
"Yes." Hua Er rushed out.
A minute had passed. The loud footsteps were enough for me to look at the visitor. Hua Er excused herself from the room, leaving me with him.
"Greetings to Your Grace." Jaxon bowed politely, beaming up at me.
A smile spread across my face as I made my way down to embrace him. There was a short silent moment between us, but I made sure to break it. I pulled away. "I feel like I'm on top of the world."
"I'm sure you do," he plopped himself by the chair to the side. "I am so proud of you."
I raised my wrist to display the jade bangle. "And look! One of the ingredients for our way out!"
Jaxon's face lightened, glowing almost.
"That, surprisingly, didn't take long," he chuckled. He licked his lips before looking up at me earnestly. "Hey, you sure you're not up for stabbing ourselves with the pin? The golden phoenix pin is strictly for empresses."
"I feel obliged to become Empress now," I joked, still peering down at him. He sat down so casually, so masculinely, that it was hard not to kiss him right now. It took me a while to realise what I've said. I didn't want to give Jaxon mixed signals.
"But I haven't had sex with the Emperor. I don't occasionally accompany him," I continued. "Jaxon, you know I'll need to give birth for anything like that to happen? Imagine if I did become Empress. Wouldn't it suck to know that he loves me, and I can't reciprocate the feelings?"
"That is true, you're not wrong," Jaxon replied, then shaking his head. "I never said to become the Empress, I thought of just stealing the pin from her... Too risky, right? I wouldn't want to put that on you."
I laughed. The sweetest laughter escaped from my lips and brought a slight smile on his. "Of course you thought of that."
"And I don't like to share," Jaxon whispered, hungrily eyeing me up and down.
"What was that?" I leaned forward, my face inches away from him.
I acted as if I was clueless. I expected more elaboration from him, but he stopped himself. Jaxon moved his face away from me. "It was good to see you, Carmen."
He rose up from the chair. I moved out of his way for him to leave, but he held my hand, clasping it in his. My cheeks felt hot. There was hot tension between us, and I wanted him to just say it. Jaxon frustrated me so much. I wanted him to elaborate on those words, I wanted him to repeat what he had said.
"I'll take my leave, Your Grace, I came to congratulate you on your title," Jaxon teased, raising my chin with his fingers. "I will risk it to see you again."
With that, he left.
What was that? Seriously, what was that?
Men have to be the most difficult thing on the entire planet! Even in a parallel universe, I still find myself in the same situations I can find myself in, in my own universe. I let out a loud groan by myself, collapsing on my seat.
I grumpily crossed my arms.
Perhaps I was falling in love? Or was I just bored? Or was Jaxon the only alternative I can have because I am angry at the Emperor? If it was between the Emperor and Jaxon, I'd pick myself!
Jaxon had a fresh scent to him. I wondered what it was. Maybe if I found his fragrance, I can keep his scent next to me by my bedside. Or was that too creepy? There was nothing I could do as of now, but mope about the terrible encounter we had. I don't believe that I should be initiating any romantic actions towards him at all. I didn't see him being uncomfortable, I may add.
Before I could have my peace of mind, my maids burst into the room. I quickly adjusted myself in my seat to a casual seating position. They kneeled in the middle of the room.
"Your Grace! There is urgent news!" Pink exclaimed.
I leaned forward. "What is it?"
"Her Majesty is pregnant!" Blue replied, a noticeable disturbance on her face.