I don't know which is worse: returning home to an angry mother or an annoying brother who won't stop teasing you. What happened was, I went home wanting to burst in tears and then my mother gave me an hour long lecture about coming home late and not letting her know where I went, then Seth won't stop teasing me about the fact that he had seen me on television dancing like a bloody idiot and then kissing a certain someone and looking confused.
"I-I-I have to go." He says.
"What?" His eyes had gone from purple to blue within matter of a second. I know what I saw and I was not imagining it.
"I'm sorry Sam. I have to go." He pushes through the crowd of people around us, leaving me standing there by myself.
Right after the best kiss I've ever had, he leaves.
Mum left early this morning for her work but I'm sure she's still a little upset about me coming home at 2 a.m. in the morning. Seth, on the other hand, is still irritating me with the whole 'You kissed Jon!!' thing. He and I are having breakfast and he just laughs at me about it.
"It's funny because the camera was focused on you two and your face was just like, 'Why am I kissing him?' and 'Who is he again?' and 'I don't know who you are but I like kissing you.' So yeah, it was bloody hilarious. Mum didn't see it, lucky for you, otherwise you'd have another lecture about kissing strangers. But still, you should have invited me and maybe I could've kissed someone pretty. After Scorpius left, I had nobody else to hang out with. Teddy was not in his house, must have been at the Potters, so I just went with Fred."
"That's nice, Seth."
Seth is the last thing on my worries right now.
Two names: Edward and Jon.
That's all I could think about.
The purple eyes from Jon just made me even more confused. I'm already confused about my feelings for Edward and now I'm more confused about the whole Jon thing. Why did he have purple eyes? Is he a metamorphmagus and feels the same thing as Edward is feeling, hence why they both have purple eyes? Or is Jon actually Edward using his metamorphmagus powers to change appearance? Has Jon even existed or was it just bloody Lupin the entire time? Or maybe Jon is real but last night it was Edward? I am so confused and frustrated and I want to cry.
"So what did you and Jon do after you kissed?" Seth asked once again. "Wait, never mind. Don't tell me. I don't want to know."
The boy left me, that's what he did.
It's literally like Cinderella. He leaves as soon as something was happening and he just left me completely confused and curious. Maybe he was about to transform into his true form and had to run away.
"Okay."
I made up my mind.
I'm going to get answers.
***
"Where is Edward?"
"He is sleeping at his room." Andromeda replies, not removing her eyes from the Daily Prophet. "He just came back from the Potters this morning. Apparently, they had stayed up all night to watch the fireworks so he's exhausted."
"Oh, that's cool. I'll just go to his room and sit and wait for him to wake up."
"Okay. Behave, kid."
Behave? Probably not.
I've only been to the Tonks house for a few times so I don't know exactly where everything is. Although I do know where Edward's room is, since it's the only room on the 3rd floor that has a black door that has bands related decorations on it.
The house is rather quiet and the only audible noise is my sneakers gliding through the floors. Without even knocking, I opened the door and see shirtless Edward snoring and close to falling off his bed.
Ugh.
He is so cute.
I reached down to brush his hair with my hand. "Edward Lupin, you are making me mad in more ways than one."
Seth and Andromeda both said he was with Harry last night. So that means it wasn't Edward with me last night and it was actually Jon? And Jon is really a metamorphmagus?
"Gran, please get out." He mumbles quietly, moving his head the other way.
"Wake up, Lupin."
"Why are you calling me that?" He yawned, fluttering his eyes open. At first glance, he just shrugs and smiles. At the second glance, he furrows his eyebrows and widen his eyes. "Oh! What are you doing here?"
"Reasons."
"Um... Okay."
He and I sort of just had a staring contest for two minutes and he was the first one to break the eye contact. Mine must have been so intense. "We need to talk, friend."
"May I first put on a shirt before this talk?"
"No."
"Okay."
I don't even know where to start.
"First question. How common are metamorphmagus?"
He gave me a puzzled look. "Not very."
"Second question. What were you doing last night?"
"Partying."
"Where were you?"
"Out."
"Out where?"
"Under the moonlight."
"Edward, I'm going to hit you with this pillow if you don't give me a straight answer. You always confuse me. Last night, I kissed this guy and I liked it."
"Oh... That's cool I guess." He shrugs, looking down at his lap. "Anything else you want to drop and break my heart?"
"Lupin!"
"Yes darling?"
"This boy, he was a metamorphmagus. He had purple eyes. You're a metamorphmagus. You've had purple eyes."
He nods slowly. "Okay so? There are others like me. I said we're rare but not nonexistent, Sammy." He grins, crossing his arms. "Purple eyes with you? I wouldn't be surprised."
"What does that even mean?"
"Nothing."
Groaning, I threw my head back and covered my face with my hands. "Edward, will you just tell me the truth? Are you or are you not Jon?"
"Jon who?"
I glared at him. "So you really don't know?"
"Know what?"
I don't even know if I should believe his act or not. He is just sitting there with a grin on his face. For someone who claims he is heart broken, I'm finding that a little hard to believe. "Okay you know what? I'm going to find Jon and I'm going to -- "
Right before I could even finish my sentence, I was cut off when he jumped out of bed and stood in front of me. Without saying a word, he changes his hair color into black, his eyes blue, makes himself a little more broad and his height a couple of inches taller. And right there, stands none other than Jon.
"I was not expecting you to find out nor planned for you to find out this way." He sighs, brushing a hand through his hair. "But yes, I am Jon. He doesn't exist. He's just me."
My mind just replayed the image of Edward slowly shifting to Jon and now I kind of want to faint and scream and punch something, all at the same time.
Taking deep breathes to calm myself down, I sat down on his bed and glared at him.
Jon is Edward.
Edward is Jon.
I kissed Edward last night.
I kissed Edward when I was 7 years old.
He was my first kiss.
Edward was that boy I kissed when we were little.
He was the same boy who had shoved his cake all over my dress on me
He's the same boy who left me last night after that kiss.
After all this time, it has been Edward.
"Do you need a drink or something? You look like you're about to explode." He chuckles, snapping me out of my thoughts. "I know it's a little shocking but yeah. Surprise!"
Clutching on the pillow beside me, I stood up and hit the metamorphmagus boy with it. Over and over again. "I can't believe you!" I hissed, aiming for his face. "This whole time! It's been you!" I hit him in his chest roughly. "I hate you so damn much! Why would you even do that? Why didn't you just tell me in the first place!"
Within one movement, the pillow was snatched away from me and I was gently pushed down on the bed. "Okay, story time." Lupin sat down next to me, looking a little nervous. "But try not to lose your temper after this story okay? Or if you do, try not to go for the face because I value it a lot."
I sat further away from him and grabbed onto another pillow, just in case. "Go on."
"Okay. So when we were little, we met at the Rookwood Mansion. It was one of their parties. I was 8 years old and you were 7. Gran used to be close friends with the Rookwoods so she attended the party and took me with her. I didn't want to go with her because I wanted to go with Harry at that time so I was really acting like a brat. Back then, I've got black hair just because I wanted to fit in with the Potters a little more. I had blue eyes just for the fun sake of it, and I was also a little chubby and shorter back then so you didn't recognize me."
That's exactly how I remember Jon when I first met him.
"At that party, Gran was talking to her friends and I was just really bored so I was walking around the mansion, finding fun things to do. When I was eating a cake, I decided I didn't like it and when I was looking for a trashcan to throw it away, I just happened to bump into you. I didn't see you because you were very very short so my cake kind of just splattered all over your dress."
Yes, I remember that scene very well. He even laughed at me for what he did rather than apologizing.
"And then you screamed at me and how your mother was going to kill you for ruining the dress and then you just left. A few minutes after that, I saw you and I was going to apologize. Since everybody else was dancing, I figured I'll just talk to you while we're dancing. I don't know why. I just did it. So I kind of pulled you for a dance and tried to apologize but you just keep yelling at me. And then I panicked because people were looking at us so I kissed you."
Oh my god.
"Truth is, you were actually my first kiss also. I just couldn't tell you. When I first saw you at Kings Cross Station, 1st year, I told Gran that I knew you from the party and I was literally freaking out thinking you were going to remember me and like be angry with me so I just changed my hair color and used my actual eye color so you won't recognize me. And surprisingly, you didn't find out until now."
I'm going to vomit.
"When Gran said that the Rookwoods are going to have a party again and you were going, I thought it would be fun to have me, or Jon as you know, go and see if you'd remember. Since you think that Jon is a completely different person, I feel like I just have more confidence around you as Jon, so I've kind of been using him. Just like last night, I was Jon because -- well, Jon has the guts to kiss you and I don't because I'd be too nervous and if I screw up, you'll never see Jon again so it was okay. So yeah, there's that."
Again, I think I might faint.
All these information are barely hitting me and everything makes more sense now. That's why the similarities between Jon and Edward are uncanny. I'm just too daft to notice it before. Jon and Edward's personalities and everything are the same, except for their appearance.
Now how am I supposed to look at other people without thinking they're Edward also?
This just gives me trust issues.
"Lupin, I was going crazy about that thing. I was talking about you to 'Jon' and all this time, it's been you and that just makes me feel so upset because I just --- ugh, I don't know. Why did you even run away after we kissed?"
"Because I had a feeling you would see the whole purple eyes and hair thing because of the emotion I was feeling at that moment and I was still Jon and you couldn't see that, so I ran. But apparently, I failed because here you are."
"Right." I stood up and faced away from him, putting hands on my temple. I feel like I will have a headache for a week after this. "This complicates things a bit, between us. I mean, it shouldn't matter because it's still you but I just feel like --- I don't even know how to put this in words. I need more time and distance between us."
"What do you mean?" He walks in front of me. "Sam, didn't you feel something last night? It wasn't even just the kiss. It was the whole night we spent together. It was like we were on cloud nine. We were so happy and the feelings -- "
"Yes, I was feeling that with Jon and I felt guilty because I was also thinking of you at the back of my mind but now it turns out you're the same person and I was loosing my mind for nothing."
"Right. It's okay."
"No it's not, Edward. I just -- I don't know. There's this feeling that I can't explain. I'm just going to go home and not think about anything. I think distance between us right now would be nice and when we see each other again, maybe things will be much nicer. Right now I'm just confused and my feelings are all over the place so I just need to get myself together."
"Okay. Like I said, I'll wait."