Word Count: 1,962
"No."
He stopped mid sentence, mouth snapping closed as his eyes screwed into a look of confusion, "What?"
"I said no," she shook her head, arms crossed tightly over her chest, forcing herself to look him in the eyes and not on the small bag he continued to pack with his things.
In went his red jacket.
The old sheath to his knife.
The small stuffed hippo she'd managed to get him for his birthday just a few days ago-
She bit her lip to keep from screaming.
He wasn't leaving.
He couldn't be leaving.
Not again.
"Keith, I don't want you to leave. You- you can't run from this, not again," though, if Nifa was being completely honest with herself, this was the only time he was truly leaving and not coming back. Him and his Blade missions she could stand, because she knew he'd be back from those and she could pretend, even for just a little bit, that he'd never left before he was off again and the cycle would repeat itself all over.
She had been sound with her charade of repeating to herself that Keith was the black paladin, he couldn't leave this time-
But this time.
After what happened today.
He- he wasn't coming back.
It'd been a mess all morning, the paladins getting back from escorting some refugees that had been ambushed mid-transport; Galra ships falling onto them like ants to honey, and tearing with such ferocity, they needed Voltron to finish the fight.
They needed Voltron.
But Keith wasn't back yet.
Sitting on the castle's bridge, listening to the cries of the rest of the team in battle, she'd known Shiro and her were thinking along very similar lines, both of them knowing, sooner or later, it would've come to this: with Keith off on a Blade mission while his team desperately needed him someplace else-
And it was Shiro who made the first move to do something about it, running down to the black lion's hangar and reconnecting with her in just enough time to fly to his team and finish the fight.
Without Keith.
And when the Blade finally stepped into the castle's bridge hours later-
He was met with hard expressions at every angle.
Nifa would be lying if she said she didn't understand the pressures everyone was facing during those moments of staring coldly at the only member of their team absent during an important operation. They needed Keith to be present, and not away as many times as he was with the Blades, no one had given him a single reason to be running off like this, and it was tearing everyone apart to be picking up after the one person who should have it all under control.
But-
At the same time-
She also understood what Keith was going through. He'd been told all those months ago that he wasn't human, and now he was finally getting the chance to explore that side of him, to understand what being Galra in this war really meant.
But it still didn't change the fact they needed him here, at the castle, with Voltron more than they needed him with an infiltration, rebel group, more than ready to give up their lives to the cause. Even with Shiro finally, back, none of them denied they still needed all hands on deck.
Not some. All.
That was just what came with being a paladin of Voltron.
He should be used to it by now.
But he wasn't.
Not even close.
And now, here he was, giving some (complete and utter bullshit) about leaving for a Marmora mission that would "take months" to put into action.
Being friends with him for this long, was enough to tell her this was a far different story than the one he was telling. Pairing that with the almost permanent consciousness of the red lion taking residence in her head since she'd stepped foot into Keith's room was nearly enough to drive her mad. And she'd be lying if she said it wasn't tearing her up inside that she could not for the life of her figure out just what the heck he thought he was chasing (or getting away from) to get him to pull this far away from the team, without barely a heartfelt goodbye behind him.
What was wrong with this?
What was wrong with him?
"Nifa, I already told you, I'm not running." He shook his head, proceeding to shove something with a little more force than necessary into the blue bag on the bed, "It's just, this mission is-"
"I know, Keith, it's huge," she broke in with a sigh, finally sitting down on the edge of the mattress as she continued to watch him fumble to get the bag closed. "I know what mission you're talking about. You've been going on about that quintessence line for weeks now, and I can tell that means a bit to you, but-" she broke off of her thoughts, shaking her head, "but something tells me that isn't the reason you're leaving."
In a single beat of silence, she watched pale hands finally go still, dark violets meeting hers for the first time since this conversation started, cheeks red, fingers shaking now that they were still.
And she could see rock-hard regret painting every inch of his face.
"Keith, please," it no longer felt all that weird, sliding her hand on top of his, they'd managed to break down so many more of his barriers since they came to space. It felt like their friendship was stronger now than it'd ever been- "talk to me, whatever it is, we can figure this out-"
He jerked his hand away as if burned, panic lacing his features for a single second before turning away, back to her, arms crossed, "I- I don't want to talk about it."
Nifa bit her lip, taking in the rugged stance now in front of her, black hair nearly to his shoulders, he'd have to cut it soon-
"Keith-"
"I said, I don't want to talk about it-"
"Well, too bad, blade boy, I want to talk about it now-"
"Why?" He broke, whirling around, eyes like hot coals, fists clenching, voice raising ever so slightly, "why the sudden interest? Is it because I'm leaving? Because you're not going to see me again?"
"That's exactly why, Keith, I- I don't know what's gotten into you, and I want to help-"
He crossed his arms, fingers digging into the sleeves of his Blade uniform, "Well, I don't need your help."
She raised a brow at his growling tone. Getting to her feet, she stepped to face him, his shoulders now hunched, expression fighting to look vacant as she fought to search his eyes for some sort of answer to this infuriating puzzle.
Black whispered he was trying to hide the truth from even her.
Uh uh.
There was no way that trick was going to work.
"Need or want?" She challenged.
She watched him flinch, looking further away from her.
"Keith, this may surprise you, but there's more to this than you trying to act tough in front of other people while you're sitting and struggling with yourself, and you still continue to refuse to talk to somebody about this.
"You and I both know there's more to this than what you're bothering to tell me, and today just proves how desperate you are to get away from us. Just- what is up with you? I thought you liked it here, I thought you'd be more than happy to have Shiro back to teach you how to be a leader, but you keep looking more and more scared of talking to him alone, and I don't, for the life of me, understand what's going on in your head to make you think he's any different than when you left-"
"This has nothing to do with Shiro, Nifa, it has everything to do with me, alright?"
It was her turn to stop mid-sentence, mouth still hanging open as Keith's words rang through the room, muffled shock hitting her system as she realized what she was talking about.
She didn't need the lions to tell her what must be his reason for leaving.
She could see that much on her own now.
"Keith-"
He flinched again, harder this time at how soft her voice suddenly became.
"Does Shiro reconnecting with the black lion somehow have something to do with you leaving?"
She could tell, the moment the words left her mouth, she could tell she hit the hammer right on the head, the way Keith seemed to sink further into himself (how was that even possible by now?) was just more proof of how right she'd gotten straight to the truth.
Keith shook his head with a breath, "I- I don't belong here anymore, Nifa," the next moment he met her eyes had her heart breaking with how completely and utterly defeated he looked, "and I tried to fit. I tried piloting Black, I tried keeping a level head, I tried being a leader even after Shiro got back and nothing's worked out, I've only made everything worse."
He turned away from her, voice strained and hard, arms crossing tighter over his chest as he looked to the floor.
"I need to leave, I- I want to leave. With Shiro reconnecting with Black, being able to do everything doing everything I can't, there's no longer any reason for me to stay here, I'd be dead weight if I stayed. I- I'm not the leader Shiro thought I was, I never was."
She was pretty sure something inside her broke with his words, stepping forward to but a gentle hand on his shoulder, giving it a squeeze, "But- I'm still here, Keith."
"Are you?" He questioned, brows furrowing, voice growing hard as he shrugged her hand off-
Had she?
Nifa shook her head, trying to clear it, "Yes, we're friends remember? I'll always be here for you, just- please, please don't go. Don't go off for some mission just to get away from us. We can work this out together, I promise. You don't have to run to the Blade of Marmora to figure out we need you here, we're your family-"
Her voice had grown surer with the words before suddenly falling silent with a clash of lips on hers. The pressure of the body against her was enough to send her stumbling backward, legs hitting the bed, feet stiffening just in time to keep her from falling onto the mattress as pale arms grabbed her by her shoulders, his touch soft and passionate for only a moment before pulling away, violet eyes wide and gasping.
Nifa was pretty sure hers were wider, yellow orbs wide in shock-
What-
Without a moment to even get her suddenly scrambled thoughts into order, Keith was suddenly stumbling backward face going red as his unexpected action, covering his mouth with his hand before shaking his head wildly, black hair shaking, "I- I'm sorry, Stargazer. I'm sorry, I just- Goodbye." She was still standing stiff, staring blankly at him as Keith made a mad dash for his bag on the bed, turning tail and leaving the room in two seconds flat.
Her mouth opened and closed.
She- she could still taste him on her lips.
What-
By the time she'd gotten over herself enough to chase him down, Keith was already gone, speeding off toward the Blade of Marmora base, leaving more questions than answers swirling around in her head, leaving her behind and separating them once again to the expanse of space-
And leaving her wondering just what that one little kiss between them meant for the future.
...
Brought to you by TheUltraNinjaShipper back once again with their original OC Nifa, and requested a little argument/uncertainty between her and Keith's friend-ish relationship and they even made art for this chap!! Thank you so much for enjoying the work, I'm glad you like it!!