it was six months later.
one year after the incident.
"hello?"
"j-joshua?"
"o-oh. t-tyler..."
"i um... i made a decision. i would like you to be a part of the kids' lives."
"r-really?"
"yes."
"w-would you all possibly um... possibly like to move back here?"
there was a long pause.
"wouldn't it be a bother?"
"no. not at all. please, come back."
"a-alright..."
//
after one more month, tyler, ruby, eloise and augustus were all moved back into their old house.
with joshua.
when they arrived, nothing had changed. they had their old rooms and clothes back, and there was finally food in the pantry.
"tyler, i-i'd like you to know that if i do or say anything that makes you uncomfortable, you have to tell me."
"o-ok."
"f-friends?" josh asked hopefully, raising his eyebrows.
"friends," tyler whispered, looking down at the floor.
ruby, gus and ellie didn't call josh their father anymore.
instead he was 'jishjish.'
and only 'jishjish.'
"i'm going to go grocery shopping. anything specific anyone would like?" josh asked, looking at his guests.
"g-goldfish pwease," gus said quietly.
"ruby? anything for you?"
"n-no thank you," she replied almost silently.
"c-could you maybe get some apples for ruby? s-she's been wanting them for a while but w-we couldn't afford them..." tyler said shyly.
josh quickly nodded. "of course. i'll see you all later."
//
josh returned a couple hours later with several bags of groceries in his hands.
including two containers of every flavor of goldfish the store sold and ten apples.
tyler had been in the shower and he didn't notice josh came in until he saw him downstairs making dinner.
and he noticed a new vase full of carnations placed on the counter.
they were his favorite flower.
joshua remembered.
he walked down the stairs, walking up to josh and standing an awkward distance away from him.
"w-would you like any help making dinner?"
"no, thank you. it's actually going alright. just sit down and relax. the kids are taking their naps," josh said.
tyler sat down at the kitchen table, shakily taking a sip of the tea he had made earlier.
"so... any new music you like?" josh asked as he prepared the meal.
"m-me?"
josh smiled and nodded. "yeah, you."
"o-oh. u-um, n-no. not really. w-what about you?"
"me neither. i hate everything that's on the radio. it's too mainstream. no meaning to it."
"y-yeah."
they then sat in a long silence.
"t-the flowers you got a-are pretty," tyler spoke up.
"oh, yeah. t-they remind me of a friend," josh said.
"t-tell me about them."
"well, they're easily the kindest person i know. and the person i care about most. they're very pretty, too, i must say. they taught me a lot about myself. and i've realized over the past few months that i took them for granted while i had them. just because they were mine doesn't mean i had to treat them like an object. but i did. and i can't stop thinking about it," josh sighed.
tyler stood up and walked towards the stairs. "u-um. i-i'm gonna wake the kids," he said quietly.
"o-ok. i-i'll be here," josh replied.
tyler woke all the kids, carrying the twins in his arms as ruby led them down the steps.
"h-hi jishjish," she said quietly, having never lost her sweetness.
"hey, miss ruby!" he smiled.
"i-i would like you to come to my kindergarten graduation," she said, holding out a piece of paper.
josh smiled and nodded. "i'm truly honored, ruby. of course i'll come."
ruby smiled and nodded, hugging his leg and then sitting at her spot at the kitchen table. the twins sat in tyler's lap as they ate, both happy to be full for the first time in a year.
"night night, jishjish," they both said in unison as tyler carried them upstairs to put them to bed.
it was ruby and josh's first time alone in a year.
"y-you made daddy sad," she said quietly, picking at her food.
"i-i know, ruby. a-and it's the worst thing i've ever done," he replied quietly.
"but he still likes you."
"h-he what?"
"every night he would cry and say your name and how much he missed you. a-and then he would come out of his room with red lines on his arms. i don't know what they were, though. he didn't tell me," she said.
josh sighed and put his face in his hands.
he was the reason tyler caused harm to himself.
he was the reason tyler no longer trusted anyone.
but by that time, tyler returned.
"i think it's time for bed, miss ruby," he said tiredly.
"c-can jishjish kiss me goodnight?" she asked for tyler's permission.
tyler chewed on his lip. "i... i um... i-i... um... s-sure..."
ruby smiled and toddled over to josh, hugging him and letting him kiss her forehead. "goodnight, princess. sweet dreams."
tyler then carried her to her room, reading her a story and snuggling with her until she fell asleep.
he then returned downstairs.
he had a look on his face.
it was the look that josh always knew meant he needed a kiss.
but he wasn't allowed to kiss tyler anymore.
"c-can i get you anything? water? a blanket?" josh asked.
"n-no. n-no, thank you," tyler said sadly.
"m-may i um... c-can i give you a-a hug?" josh asked quietly.
tyler looked up nervously but slowly nodded his head.
josh inched closer to him and pulled him in for a hug, it being his first hug with an adult in a year.
"i'm here for you, tyler. anything you need, anything at all, please, don't hesitate to ask."
"t-thank you, josh. goodnight," tyler said, lying down on the couch where he had been sleeping the past two weeks.
"a-are you sure you wouldn't like the bed? i-i'd be more than happy to switch," josh said.
tyler shook his head. "n-no thank you."
"g-goodnight, tyler," josh sighed.
"goodnight, joshua."
"i lo-" josh stopped himself, quickly disappearing up the stairs.
"maybe someday, joshua."