Emily POV
I wake up form the coldness of the room and go to put up the heater some more when a picture peeks out from one of the vents.Confused, I take it up and turn around and see a picture of Alison And I.
A photograph, that was all it took for the tears to burst Emily's dam of restraint. She clutched the solid wooden frame tight in her hand, able to see a ghostly reflection of her face in the thin sheen of glass that covered it. She looked past her own dreary eyes and stared upon her face that had been caught in a moment of perfection. It was the happiest memories that hurt the worst, they were the ones that cut her deepest. She focused in on his eyes, they were glistening with the twinkle of laughter that once she loved. Now, they laughed at her. They reminded her of what she had lost. She clutched the frame tight, pressing it hard to her breasts wishing to feel her head resting upon them one last time. It was in that moment Emily realized she no longer knew how she felt. She was numb, yet somehow in agony. She longed to be free of him, yet she wanted him back more than she'd ever wanted anything.
''Nicki I need you to leave''I said waking her up.She looked at me confused,.
''Why?''
''I want to be alone for sometime''I said and she shook her head and put on her clothes,
''Merry Christmas''she said walking out the door upset.
I miss Ali.I don't know where she is and I might not see her again.In Emily's sobbing was the sound of a heart breaking. Hearts don't snap like brittle caramel or burst like an overfilled balloon. A heart breaks in the heaving waves of a new disturbing reality that has arrived uninvited. It is the one in which their child no longer lives, or their partner is terminally sick. It is entering a life they can't bear and so they break. They aren't the same again, there's just a part of them that had to die so that the rest of them could carry on their duties to the other people they love.
''What A Christmas''I said as I quiet down.
''I push everything away''
''My mom doesn't want to see me,MAY FRIENDS LEFT and I BROKE THE GIRL WHO LOVED ME THE MOST''
I change my clothes and go in the warm bath water.
Darkness enveloped her. The water closed in around her, filling her with a deep dread. She held her breath as long as she could, too long in fact. Red and black splotches danced in front of her and she couldn't remember if her eyes were opened or closed. The coldness she had felt upon entering the water was completely gone. A desperate hot wave had come over her, warming even her frosted toes. Her heart was beating rapidly in panic. The urgency for air was more apparent than ever. There weren't red blotches in her field of vision anymore. It was all black.
She opened her mouth, gasping for air.
I come out the water coughing and lay on the bathroom floor.My phone rings and I only answer because it was my Baby Momma.
''Hello Naya, Merry Christmas''I said acting happy.
''Hello, I've decided and the kids could spend Christmas with you and Merry Christmas to you too.I'll drop them by in a hour or so''She hangs up and my day brightens a bit.
I rush around the room changing into anything I could find and I start clearing up.
Time Lapse.
The doorbell rang and I rang to it and see my little babies all grown up.
''Mummy''They say jumping on me making me fall to the ground.
''Hey babes''I said smiling.I look at Naya and mouth Thank You.
''I want us to open presents''They said rushing inside I following.