Fair warning, this entire chapter is literally just fluff to make up for my sins in traumatising you all earlier :)
Sebastian
The Healer finished up her work, cleaning and wrapping up Eloise, making notes, showing Olive how to feed her and everything else Healers do after a birth before declaring her completely healthy and leaving our cottage.
I breathed a silent breath of relief knowing Eloise was okay. I didn't tell Olive how scared I was. Firstly, that she was born five weeks early, but secondly, how she'd spent all her time in Azkaban with Olive during most of the pregnancy.
But here I was, a new father. My sleeping newborn daughter in my arms and my powerful goddess of a wife catching up on some well earned sleep in our bed.
I did quickly notice we had nothing for a baby here. Not even a bassinet. But that was fine. I wasn't going to sleep again tonight. Not when I had two beautiful girls to admire and look after. I could sort all of that out in the morning. For now, she'd just stay in my arms.
I debated between opening the letters or just staring at my daughter a little longer. With her dark brown hair, her blueish-green eyes, her button nose... if she didn't have my head of hair, I may have questioned if she was even my child. She was Olive all over.
Probably for the best...
I sighed and reached across, taking the letters Olive had written so long ago and I picked up the one in an envelope with "Baby Sallow" written on it. Tearing it open was quite difficult to do one handed, but I managed.
"I'll read it out loud for you, alright, baby girl?" I whispered.
"Dear Baby Sallow,
If you're reading this or having it read to you, it means you were actually born. Your dad and I actually had a baby!
It's a funny story and a little cliche... but it was always going to be your dad. I had told myself I never wanted kids. I didn't want an innocent child to suffer like I did. But he made me change my mind. He's made me change my mind on many things.
He also encouraged me to get my feelings out, and this is the best way I could think to do it, so I'll be honest.
I'm scared. Terrified, really. How could the two of us, so messed up and having been tangled in so many awful things in our short lives willingly choose to bring another innocent life into the world? Something that is a perfect mix of the two of us and all of our flaws?
But you know what changed my mind and gave me some reassurance we might be able to do it?
Watching your dad change. He grew. From a once reckless and careless boy, he grew into this intelligent, determined man. Despite everything that went wrong in his life, he overcame it.
And then, he chose to love me so fiercely, despite everything I'd done. Everything he'd done. He has saved me. Literally and figuratively. I'm sure he'll tell you all about his heroics one day.
And as for you? I pray that we raise you the way we wished we had been raised. To give you the childhood we never got. I promise you that we will do everything we can to make sure your life is wonderful and as happy as it can be.
I hope you get his love and drive for learning.
I hope you get my fiery passion to do whatever you set you mind to.
I hope you know about everyone in our lives who will help us in our journey to raise you, living and departed.
I hope you love us just as much as we love you.
Because I already know, it's a lot. And it hurts. But we are just so, so happy.
One day when you're older, I hope you read this again once you know how and you can look at everything I said and think to yourself, "they really did all of that." because that is all I want.
I love you so much, Baby Sallow.
Mum."
I had flicked over the words before, quickly glancing at them when I'd found them on the table, but reading them out loud was different. She had bared her soul in those words, expressing her fears and hopes for our daughter with a vulnerability that touched me deeply.
"I was scared too. I'm still scared," I said, my voice catching slightly as I looked down at my daughter, my thumb rubbing gentle circles on her hair. It was a reminder of how much courage it took for us to embark on this journey of parenthood, knowing our own troubled pasts.
I stared at Eloise, cradled in my arms, and made a silent promise to her. She would have a loving home, filled with laughter and support, something Olive and I had yearned for in our own childhoods.
This was going to be the most spoiled kid out there with the worlds best parents. I just knew it.
Eloise started to fuss and I sighed. I knew I had to wake Olive now to feed. There was one thing I couldn't do for her, and that was make milk.
I would if I could.
But I didn't have to wake up Olive, she heard Eloise and stirred on her own.
"I think she's hungry, love." I whispered.
"You've been crying." She looked at me, her eyes all glassy from her deep sleep.
I turned my head away, not wanting to burden her with my emotions right now. "Oh, uh, I'm alright. Really," I replied, my voice a bit unsteady.
Olive didn't push further, understanding that I just needed a moment to collect myself. Instead, she focused on our daughter, whispering soothing words and stroking her hair as she fed.
"I might uh, go and see Ominis and Lawson if that's alright." I asked, "I'll just be outside. Call out to me if you need me."
Olive nodded and drew her attention back to Eloise.
I flashed her a small smile as I left our room and found Ominis and Lawson both sitting at the kitchen table, doing nothing in particular. I hadn't left our room in almost a day, since Olive went into labour, and I realised that I was so wrapped up in my new family, I didn't even tell them we'd delivered a healthy baby.
"Well? We heard lots of noise and sounds of a baby crying. I assume it went well?" Ominis asked as he heard my footsteps echo on the wooden floor.
"Yeah, it went great. A baby girl." I said, smiling so wide, I couldn't stop myself even if I wanted to.
"A baby girl! That's fantastic, Sebastian, congratulations!" Lawson exclaimed, his enthusiasm filling the room. "How are they doing?"
"They're both well. Olive's feeding her at the moment. When she's done, I'll see if you can meet her." I said.
"Has she got a name?" Ominis asked.
I nodded, my heart swelling with pride. "Her name is Eloise."
They both smiled. "Well, that's cute, isn't it, Omi?" Lawson commented.
"Eloise Anne Sallow." I said.
Ominis choked up and his head dipped a little. I didn't mean to upset him, I really didn't.
"Ominis, I'm sorry, I—"
"No, Sebastian. Please don't apologise. I adore it." His voice croaked as he spoke. "I just know Anne would be so incredibly honoured... and so proud of you."
Tears welled up in Ominis' eyes, and he reached out to grasp my hand, his grip warm and full of emotion.
"Thank you," he whispered, his voice thick with unspoken gratitude. "It means the world to me. To honour Anne like this..."
I found myself tearing up too. Anne had told me she wanted to see me do these things when I saw her in the afterlife, and here I was, doing them. I hoped she and mum and dad were proud of me.
"Would, uh-" I spoke, wiping my nose with my sleeve, "Would you like to meet her?"
Lawson practically jumped up while Ominis kept a more composed demeanor, wiping his eyes with a handkerchief he'd had stuffed in his pocket.
Something you could use other than your sleeve. You're responsible for another human now, have some decorum!
I took their reactions as a resounding yes and peeked through the door to our room.
"She's finished feeding?" I asked softly.
Olive nodded with a small smile.
"Ominis and Lawson would like to meet her, is that alright?"
Olive looked at me with a warm and tired smile, "Of course, they can come in. If they excuse my ghastly appearance."
"You've never looked better, love." I reassured her.
I wasn't just saying that to make her feel better. It was the truth. Sure, she was tired from both her incarceration and she was still healing from a long labour and birth, but something about her changed as soon as Eloise was born. Looking at her as a woman and a mother... there was something about it that was incredibly endearing and beautiful. I'd never loved her more or found her more attractive in my life.
She grumbled and adjusted herself on our bed, letting the two walk in.
Lawson suppressed an excited squeal, letting it go in his hands and tapped his feet a little.
"Relax, will you?" Ominis scolded, pulling on his arm to bring him back to Earth. "It's just another human."
"Gee, nice way to walk about your niece, Omi." I said with a small chuckle.
The two sat on one of the lounges by the fire, Lawson's eyes fixed on Eloise with awe and despite his initial excitement, now wore a soft smile as he gazed at the tiny bundle in my arms.
Ominis, on the other hand, seemed to be holding back tears again.
I took Eloise from Olive and walked her over, placing her in Lawson's arms first.
It was pretty clear Lawson had absolutely zero idea what to do with a baby. He looked awkward and uncomfortable and when Ellie shifted in her sleep, he froze completely and waited for her to stop.
"It's alright mate, you won't hurt her." I laughed.
"One can never be too cautious, Seb." He said. "Thank God she looks like Olive, though."
"Oh, ha-ha." I said sarcastically, "Though, I do tend to agree with you."
Olive scowled at me from across the room.
Whoops.
Lawson tenderly passed Eloise over to Ominis (mostly because I told him I wasn't helping him) and it was quite the sight. A blind man and one utterly terrified one trying to handle a wriggly newborn baby. But she got into Ominis' arms safely.
Ominis held Eloise gently and carefully cradled her in his arms, his fingers gently exploring her tiny features. Despite his lack of sight, his touch was incredibly gentle and precise, as if he could see every contour of her face through his fingertips.
"Sebastian, she's beautiful," Ominis said, "I can't see her, but I can feel her. She's perfect."
Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched Ominis holding my daughter. I had once thought that what Ominis and I had was irreparable. That I'd ruined whatever relationship we had left with my stupidity. But here we were on the edge of 22, the best of friends and celebrating each others blossoming relationships.
Eloise stirred in Ominis' arms, her tiny fingers grasping onto his thumb. Ominis' inhaled a little, almost like he was shocked by the gesture.
"Oh, look. She loves Uncle Omi already." Lawson quipped, wrapping an arm around Ominis and peering down at her again.
"Well, plenty of time to change that, right, Ellie?" I laughed.
Ominis didn't.
When she started to fuss again, Ominis quickly passed her back and she went back to Olive to rest.
Plus, I had some shopping to do.
"So, I need a list. What does she need?" I said to Olive, holding a piece of parchment and a quill in my hand.
"Well, she needs somewhere to sleep. Sheets and things. She'll need more clothes, nappies, socks, bonnets..."
So, literally everything?
"Alright. I'll get on it. By the way, I never managed to give you these." I said, reaching down beside one of the chairs.
It was the bundle of flowers I'd bought when I was buying her dresses.
"Flowers?" Olive looked surprised as I presented the bouquet of flowers to her. She gingerly took them in her hands, her tired eyes lighting up. "They're beautiful. Thank you."
I smiled warmly at her. "I had bought them just for being a pretty cool wife, but now I suppose they're for the amazingly brave woman who just brought our daughter into the world."
I accio'd a vase, which I realised halfway through was kind of stupid, then filled it with water and placed the flowers inside, slotting them on her bedside table.
"Now, I'm going to grab this list. Will you be alright? Ominis is still here if you need, and-"
"Yes, Sebastian. We will be fine. You head off." She reassured me with a kiss.
I winced, not wanting to leave the comfort of our little bubble at the cottage, but at some point Eloise had to stop sleeping in the bottom draw from our dresser.
I made my way to Hogsmeade via the floo network, since I didn't fancy trying to apparate with a bag full of baby essentials, and made my way straight to the shop where I knew they sold lots of handmade wooden furniture.
"Ah, good afternoon, sir! How can I help you?" The gruff-looking shop keeper greeted me.
"Good afternoon," I greeted him with a nod. "I'm in need of some baby furniture. A bassinet and perhaps a rocking chair. Do you have any of those items?"
The shopkeeper's eyes lit up with enthusiasm as he heard my request. "Ah, a growing family! Congratulations, sir. We do indeed have a selection of fine baby furniture. Please, follow me."
Hmm, I'd probably call it fully grown family, but that's alright...
He led me deeper into the shop, where a handful of baby related items were stood on display.
We stopped in front of a beautiful bassinet, made from polished oak, with intricate carvings of woodland creatures decorating the sides. It was the kind of bassinet that could become a cherished family heirloom.
"This bassinet is one of our finest creations," the shopkeeper explained. "It's made from the finest oak and enchanted for extra comfort. The mattress is made of the softest feathers for a peaceful night's sleep."
I ran my hand along the smooth wood, feeling the quality of the craftsmanship. "It's perfect. I'll take it."
"Wonderful! And finally," he said, leading me to another corner of the shop, "we have a selection of rocking chairs, perfect for those late-night soothing sessions."
One piqued my interest. It was a classic design, made from sturdy oak that mimicked the bassinet I'd selected, and I could already picture myself spending many quiet moments in it with Eloise, reading her stories.
"I'll take this rocking chair as well," I said with a smile.
The shopkeeper nodded and went about arranging the delivery of the bassinet and rocking chair to the cottage. After finalising the purchase, I made my way to a nearby store to pick up the rest of the essentials on Olive's list.
As I entered the next store, I was greeted by rows of shelves filled with various baby items. It was a bit overwhelming, but I knew I had to focus and get everything Eloise needed. I began to gather the essentials, carefully selecting soft blankets, tiny onesies, and an assortment of baby socks and bonnets.
And then I realised that babies were fucking expensive.
After the decent hit to my funds, I made my back to the cottage with an empty wallet but a full heart.
When I got home, Olive was sitting up in our room in the rocking chair I'd only just bought.
"When did that get here?" I asked, slightly confused.
"About an hour before you." She smiled, Ellie sleeping peacefully in her arms as she rocked.
Wow. Fast delivery.
"What do you think? Did I do well?"
Olive's tired face lit up with a warm smile as she looked at the new additions to the room. "You did more than well, Sebastian. These are beautiful," she said, nodding towards the bassinet. "I love them."
Olive gently shifted Eloise in her arms and carefully placed her in the bassinet, making sure she was snug and comfortable. "And it looks like Ellie approves too," she added, glancing at our peacefully sleeping daughter.
I walked over and stood beside Olive, gazing down at our precious baby. "She's perfect, just like her mother."
Olive snorted back a laugh. "That is very debatable."
"Not to me. You did so well, love." I said, tucking her under my arm and giving her a soft kiss on the head.
She turned towards me and wrapped her arms around my torso. We stood there for a moment, simply swaying and enjoying each others presence.
"I read the letter, by the way." I whispered into her hair.
She lifted her head to look at me, a confused look on her face, "Hm?"
"The one you wrote before we decided to have a baby."
"Oh. That. I forgot about that. Is that why you were crying?" She asked.
"Yeah."
Olive's eyes softened as she looked up at me. "Sebastian, I wrote that letter when I was scared and uncertain about becoming a parent. But now that Eloise is here, I have no doubts. I love her, and I love being her mother.
"I don't doubt you, Olive. You're doing wonderfully. There was just something sweet about reading it out loud to our girl now she's here when she was nothing but a mere thought when you wrote it."
Olive's smile grew as she listened to me speak and tucked her head back into my body again.
I sighed. Deeply.
"Do you think we'll be okay now?" I asked her, my cheek pressed into her hair.
Olive's arms tightened around me, and she looked up at me with a gentle and reassuring expression. "Yeah. I do."
I held her close, feeling a deep sense of comfort in her words.
"I love you, Olive."
"I love you too, Sebastian," Olive whispered, her voice filled with affection.
As we swayed gently in the room, our daughter peacefully asleep in her bassinet. Things felt like they had fallen into place for the first time in a long time. We were both still learning and Olive had a long way to go healing her mind from the torments of Azkaban but I felt like there was nothing in our way now. Just the three of us together, fumbling through life in our small little cottage.
And I wouldn't change it for the world.