•When is your birthday?
Awake 5
Claire Johnson
It made sense why the boys were being slightly strange and very... giddy. I should have known Jacob being extra quiet and G coming up to me asking for my phone was a sign. The rest of the guys had led me to the crowd where he stood in the center of it all. They must have planned this and told him I'm awake.
Shawn Mendes is standing there playing his guitar. At first his focus was towards his guitar before looking up. His eyes found mine and I couldn't help, but smile as he played the tune to 'Life of the Party'. In this moment, I felt my heart racing and my only focus seemed to be on him. His hair seemed to have grown since I've last seen him, but his hair looks just as soft as I thought about the many moments I played with his hair.
My mind was telling me to walk over to me and the other part is stunned to see him here. He smiles once he realizes I'm feeling the same mutual way. He knows I'm elastic to see him here. He began taking a few steps towards me before he stopped and decided to finish the rest of the lyrics to 'Life of the Party'.
"So baby be the life of the party," he finishes. The crowd around us erupted into applause and I remember where we are. We are at the airport and Shawn Mendes was here for a few reasons. I watched as Shawn hands his guitar over to my cousin and looked towards me now nervously. Last time I saw him, he told me I had to tell him that I needed him to leave. My heart only ached every time he came into view as that night would replay in my head. I took a sharp breath as I continue to stare at him. My heart still has that aching feeling, but there was also something else allowing me to want to forgive Shawn. He is also one of the best people I've met. He brought me out of my looming thoughts of my parents.
My parents... I walked over to him before my mind can fully comprehend what I am doing. I wrap my free arm around him and carefully wrapped my arm with my cast on around him slightly while burying my head against his chest. Shawn wrapped his arms around me without hesitation. The feeling of not wanting to let go lingered.
"Shawn," I whispered quietly and I closed my eyes feeling a range of emotions. His grip around me tightened. I've missed this. His presence currently seemed to make me happier than I thought was expected. I couldn't ignore him any longer than I have been. I couldn't imagine what he was going through in the weeks I have been in the hospital. Being in his presence seemed to ease many of my painful thoughts and emotions.
"H-hey Claire," He spoke softly almost to my ear. His tone is light and I sensed the feeling he is nervous. I could feel his breath against my skin and his grip seemed to give me a reason that he has been worried for me. I couldn't help, but feel guilty for making him go through the torture of staying away. We pull away after a few moments and realize everyone is watching us. I felt a bit uncomfortable with so many eyes on us. Both Jacob and Shawn sensed my discomfort.
"How about we get your sub Claire?" Jacob spoke lightly. I looked towards him and agreed. "We can get your food now before we have to get in line for the flight." I nod slightly as I turned back towards Shawn to see him unsure what to do.
"Let's get some sub sandwich," I smile as he nods in confusion.
"Sure... yeah. I can buy you a sandwich?"
"G has it all covered." I looked towards G to see him using my phone. He pauses what he is doing to put my phone into his pocket before looking towards me.
"Right," G nods looking towards Shawn. "You, me, Sam, J ,Claire, and Jacob can head there before we have to be at our gates," G said lightly. I come to the realization that there is the strange exchange between what had happened just weeks ago. Shawn only nodded and took a step towards me as we began walking in the direction of Subway. I walked alongside Shawn and I noticed Jacob walking ahead slightly. There was the possibility that everyone wanted me to talk to Shawn more now that he is here?
"I'm really happy you're here Shawn," I start off lightly and he turned his full attention towards me.
"You have no idea how much I needed to hear you say this," Shawn smiles and I couldn't help, but smile with him. I assumed Sam, G, and my cousin are behind taking pictures. From the corner of my eye, I see G with my phone out once again. "I was relieved when Jacob called me earlier this morning and told me you had awaken. I... hope it's alright for me to be here."
"It's more than alright. I had no idea you'd be here. A wonderful surprise really." Shawn smiles and nods. We arrive at subway and in just moments I am putting in my order. Shawn and Jacob has decided to wait for me by the entrance with Sam and my cousin. I told the worker what I'd like and in just moments, we are at the register. G takes out his wallet to pay and adds in a few chocolate chip cookies to go with my sandwich. G takes the bagged cookies and my wrapped sandwich and he immediately hands my phone over to me. "Thank you G." He turned towards me and gave me a sheepish smile.
"This is nothing Claire," he said lightly and I only nod not wanting to talk about the past in this moment. "Look Claire..." he sighed before continuing. "I am sorry for what I've done to you and especially for turning your cousin and Shawn against you. I'm sorry for everything and I know that's not enough to forgive me or even trust me."
"You've done many traumatic things G," I spoke lightly and looked towards Shawn, Jacob, Sam, and my cousin talking among each other. I looked towards G and I could only see guilt building in his expression.
"I know..."
"You made me afraid and you made me uncomfortable."
"That wasn't my intention. I-"
"Not your intention?" I frown slightly and now hug myself standing in front of him. "You've hit me, you've verbally said things to me, and you've attempted to drown me." My eyes felt the familiar stinging sensation knowing tears will start soon. I never wanted to talk about this so soon. "You did so much to me that it's hard to fully trust you."
"I know and I am sorry for causing you this much trouble. If there's anything I can do for you..."
"Be nicer to Ri," I say lightly remembering when I first met her. I remember when I first met her. Sam had introduced me to Claire when G had left my aunts house. That was where Ri & I first met and we hung out for awhile before she had to leave. G frowned towards me.
"What does Ri have anything to do wi-"
"She's your sister. I know how you treat her and I think that isn't fair you treat her the way you do like you do to me."
"I don't want to speak of this Claire," G said giving me a warning look to drop it.
"Then don't ask me to forgive you," I spoke lightly knowing I would want Riley to have the same treatment as I would have.
"Claire..."
"I'm going back to Shawn and Jacob." I looked down towards the ground and gently took my food before turning away from him to walk out of Subway.
"All set?" My cousin asked me once I approach them and all eyes are on me.
"Yeah," I smile faintly. I knew G had just exited Subway and stood somewhere behind me. Sam looked down towards his watch to check the time.
"We should probably get going," Sam says to my cousin and G. "Don't want to miss our flight and we all know mama J won't be happy if she rides back alone."
"We really should," My cousin spoke and looked towards me. "Don't I get a hug?" I break into a smile and make my way over towards him. He opened his arms and I walked onto them as he wrapped his arms around me. "Bye Claire, see you for my graduation." I pull away to look up at him.
"Wouldn't miss it."
"Have fun. Not too much fun." My cousin chuckles lightly.
"Can't make any promises. It's Shawn, Jacob, Taylor, Cam, and Nash we're talking about."
"We'll have her put to bed at a decent time," Jacob chuckles. I looked towards Shawn to see him breaking into a smile. "Or maybe Shawn and Claire will sneak off somewhere in the middle of the night." I felt my face heat remembering the evening Shawn and I went out on our first date.
"Be safe," My cousin emphasizes as I walked over to Sam to give him a hug with my one arm. I hug him tightly knowing I won't be receiving one of his great hugs until I return to Omaha.
"You're under great care," Sam says to me lightly and I nod. "I know you're going to have a great time with the guys and I hope you are able to enjoy the rest of your senior events going on." I'm not completely sure if I'm going to participate in any of them with the guys here with me and I'm sure it's too late to buy tickets for ball. I'm sure those went on sale weeks ago. The only event I know I will be participating in is my trip to Massachusetts and graduation. That makes me wonder now that the guys are here, if I can take them with me since they will be staying with me until graduation time.
The last person is G. He now stood next to my cousin and his eyes seem to be averted my towards the ground. I did not feel comfortable giving him a hug and everyone watched wondering what I would do.
"Goodbye G," I say lightly looking at him. His short dark brown hair seemed messy and I now noticed the dark circles under his eyes. Even after everything I have gone through, I felt that small attraction towards him. It seemed almost nonexistent. He looked up making eye contact and gave me a small wave.
"Bye Claire." I walked over to Shawn and Jacob and stood between as we said our final farewells before the three of them are off to their gate.
"You alright Claire?" Jacob asks looked down towards me.
"I'll be okay." Jacob nods before he took my sandwich and cookies out of my hand. I laughed lightly and smile in confusion. "Why did you take my food?"
"I actually wanted to talk to you about something," Shawn spoke softly and my eyes shifted towards him. He seemed nervous again.
"I'll let you two talk," Jacob chuckles. "I'm just going to walk ahead of you guys and meet you back at the gate. You'll be alright Claire," Jacob looked towards me making sure this would be alright. I nod and give him a reassuring smile. Jacob nods before turning and leaving with my food.
"He took my food," I said lightly hoping to break the silence. This was the first time Shawn and I have been left alone in quite awhile. He smiled slightly at my statement.
"How are you feeling?" He asked hesitantly. We began to fall in a steady sync back to our gate. We could see Jacob from a distance. "I wasn't completely sure if you wanted me to be here when you had awaken. Jacob told me you were asking for me?" My cheeks heat once again. I felt shy once again.
"I... miss you." Not a moment after we start walking we stop. He has his full attention on me with a hesitant expression.
"I thought you were upset with me?" He questioned. I looked towards his hand wondering if I could hold his hand. It was easier when we first met and were seeing where things took us. Now... I'm not completely sure. Shawn reached forward to take my hand in his and intertwined them. I looked up to see him looking at our hands before making eye contact. "You seemed to be pondering."
"I wasn't sure if I could," I spoke shyly. "I was upset with you," I say start off lightly with his question. "I realized when I was in my dream, that I can't be so stubborn and well..." I couldn't help, but bite a part of my lip and he noticed. "You make me happy and feel whole." Shawn seemed to be into some sort of thought before he refocused.
"My feelings for you hasn't changed Claire." My heart is racing and my breathing seemed to have hitched just at the words he just said. How could he feel this way after the amount I've put him through? "I've... hurt you also." He shakes his head.
"I don't care about that. I'm the one who hurt you first and I'm the one who shouldn't have used things against you. It's my fault for hurting you and not be honest with you before that evening. I went along with it." My eyes immediately water and I squeezed his hand slightly thinking back to that painful night. Shawn's expression changes to pain and regret as the first tear falls. He takes a step closer to me and brought his other hand now to my cheek where his palm rested to wipe the tears away. "Claire, I'm so sorry for putting you through this and with everything that happened afterwards.
"I forgive you Shawn," I croaked as I thought about my parents. He lets go of my hand and my cheek to pull me to his chest. His one arm wrapped around me tightly and I felt his hand caressing my head. I closed my eyes letting myself relax under his touch.
I'm ready for that moment when I walk out of the exam run finishing my last exam starting our summer vacation. Being done with school, finish packing for Florida and just getting excited for my birthday 💕 Also I'd work on updates for hours and be up until 4am... 😍 I also ready for Season 5 of Teen Wolf ~Sam