The final Quidditch match of the year - Sirius' final Quidditch match ever, he realised with a bittersweet sting - snuck up on them. It fell on a Sunday, the twenty-first of May, and unfortunately, the day before a full moon.
When Sirius woke up, early and tingling with both nerves and excitement, Remus was already awake, lying next to him and his face scrunched up in pain, the sight familiar after all this time. Sirius' heart sank.
"You don't have to come," he whispered.
"What?"
"The match. Don't come, just stay here and I'll tell you all about it when it's over."
"Oh." Remus' eyebrows furrowed even further as he considered this. "No, it's okay. I want to see you play."
Sirius wavered, feeling both happy and guilty at the same time. "It's not a big deal," he said eventually. "You've seen me play a million times before. And you're more important than a stupid Quidditch game anyway."
Remus turned his head on its side so he could look at Sirius. "But it's your last one..."
"I know. It's alright. Evans and Pete'll be there to cheer me on."
Remus went quiet again for a while, and then shook his head decisively. "No, I'll go. I go to lessons like this all the time, it's fine."
"But Moony-"
"It's not like I'll be playing," Remus interrupted, smiling tightly. "And I want to be there."
"... Okay," Sirius acquiesced, letting himself smile too. "Okay, thank you. I'm going to play extra hard for you, promise, and after we've humiliated Slytherin we'll come back up here and then I'll do nothing but look after you, okay?"
Remus rolled his eyes. "Don't need you looking after me, Pads."
"But-"
"I don't need you coddling me."
"Yeah, well, maybe you should just let me anyway!" Sirius huffed.
Remus pulled back, the effect almost instantaneous. "Forget it," he muttered, his face dark, "go get ready for your match."
Sirius sighed. He didn't like snapping at Remus - he probably shouldn't have, he probably shouldn't have said he'd look after Remus in the first place, he knew Remus hated hearing that sort of stuff - but Remus could be so bloody hot and cold. Sirius only had to put his foot in his mouth once, and then he was in the doghouse.
The doghouse. If it was thirty seconds earlier, he'd tell Remus that joke - Sirius knew he'd enjoy it. But it wasn't thirty seconds earlier, and now Remus was in a mood, and Sirius was in a mood because Remus was in a mood, so he rolled out of bed wordlessly, and the curtains fell shut behind him.
He went to go and have a shower, and let the hot water hit his back relentlessly, practically beating the tension out of him. The room filled with steam, so when he stepped out he couldn't see his reflection in the mirror.
Somehow, that didn't matter anymore. He remembered the years where he was insultingly vain and painfully insecure at the same, and he'd spend so long in front of the mirror, veering between preening and seeing her staring back at him. Now it all just seemed rather pointless.
When he left the bathroom, James was up as well, already putting on his Quidditch robes.
"Ready?" he grinned - finally no longer scared on the morning of a match.
"Sure am," Sirius said bracingly, pulling his own Quidditch robes over his head. "You've had us killing ourselves the last couple of months, no way we don't win."
James chuckled. "In a few hours, it'll all have been worth it," he said assuringly.
They left the dorm, walking down to the Great Hall. It was so early that the castle was still mostly empty, but Sirius felt wide awake.
So how's Moony doing?" James pestered.
Sirius shrugged. "'Bout as usual."
"Is he coming?"
"Don't think so, Prongs." Sirius scuffed his shoes along the floor as they walked.
"Oh." James looked at him in concern.
"It's whatever." It really was. Sirius didn't care; Remus could do what he liked.
"So, are you gonna be okay?" James asked cautiously. "I mean, you know, playing against... uh, Slytherin."
Ah. There it was - the crux of the issue, why Sirius had perhaps had too short a temper with Remus, why he was feeling so melancholy.
"I'll be fine," he grunted. "If the little git pisses me off then I'll just send a Bludger his way."
James nodded, looking unconvinced. "No need to talk to him, or even get anywhere close to him really," he said. "Just treat him like any other player."
"Sure."
They reached the Gryffindor table, where half the team was already sitting, and Sirius sent silent thanks that James was forced to stop trying to be helpful by the presence of the others. He appreciated it and all, James was only trying his best, but talking about Regulus was the last thing that he wanted to do.
James started encouraging all the team to choke down some food, and Sirius started half-heartedly eating some porridge, purposefully avoiding looking at the Slytherin table. He'd managed to avoid any confrontations with Regulus since back in October, when Regulus came back from Grimmauld Place. And he was sure his brother had been putting in just as much effort into avoiding Sirius as Sirius had with him. But the Quidditch pitch was unavoidable.
He realised then that not only was this his last ever match - it could very well be the last time he was anywhere near Reg. At least until both of them had left Hogwarts, and they were on opposite sides of this dastardly war.
He felt sick then, and pushed his bowl away with finality. He wasn't going to be eating anymore this morning. Luckily, that was when James decided the team should go down to the pitch, early enough to avoid seeing most of the other students who would do nothing but heap pressure onto the players.
Following their captain, the six Gryffindors exited the Great Hall, and Marlene fell into step beside Sirius.
"Nervous?" she asked matter-of-factly.
"Ha!" Sirius barked a laugh. "As if, McKinnon."
She shrugged. "Dunno, lots riding on this match. If we win this, we win the Cup."
"Course we'll win. Bloody snakes won't know what hit 'em."
"If you say so."
The team filed into the changing room, taking seats on the benches as James went through the strategy one final time.
"Black, McKinnon, just don't hold back," he said, "any time one of them has the Quaffle, you take them out, got it?"
"Yes sir," Marlene grinned, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.
James hesitated, but continued. "Regulus is the priority though," he added, "if you think he's spotted the Snitch, then..."
"Yeah, don't worry," Sirius said moodily, "I'll keep an eye on the twerp, he's not getting anywhere near it."
James nodded. "Right then. Chasers, you know what you're doing. Maledon, you just focus on getting the Snitch, Black and McKinnon will protect you from attacks."
"You got it, boss," the Seeker smirked.
"Alright then," James said, clapping his hands. "I think we're ready. I'm confident, guys, I think you all should be too. We've worked hard for this, we know what we're doing. And thank you, all of you, for putting up with all the work these last couple of months. I know it was tough, but right now, we're about to see the payoff. Now, Gryffindor on three. One... two... three!"
" GRYFFINDOR!"
The team all cheered, and with that they left the changing room, striding onto the pitch still bellowing. As soon as the stands spotted them, the onlookers started screaming and shouting. Even though the Slytherins started hissing, Sirius was pleased to note this was almost entirely drowned out by the roars of Gryffindor, along with the majority of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. It was always so exhilarating, the start of the game. Didn't matter if Remus wasn't there cheering, Sirius thought to himself, there were plenty of others already doing the job.
He wasn't sure he believed what he was thinking, but he thought it anyway.
He didn't bother looking up to the stands at all; it wasn't like he'd see the one he wanted to see. Which was fine, it was totally fine. Instead, his eyes fixed on Regulus, who was standing tall and proud alongside his team mates, his chin held high in defiance, an image Sirius could recognise as a mirror of himself, from time to time.
Regulus turned slightly, and their eyes met. Reg nodded at him, perfectly civil, so Sirius blew him an exaggerated kiss. Regulus immediately glared at him and turned away, while next to him, Marlene snorted.
"Rude sod," she murmured.
Sirius grinned. "I know, right?"
Then the whistle blew, and Sirius realised he had missed the handshake between the two captains during his pissing contest with his brother. He jumped onto his broom quickly and sped into the air, already looking for the Bludgers.
As normally happened, as soon as the game started he didn't really have to think, and he played purely on reflexes. He and Marlene were always in sync, he didn't know how but they always were, and this game was no different. Together, they protected the Gryffindor Seeker and attacked the Slytherin Chasers relentlessly, and all the while Sirius kept one eye on Regulus. But Regulus was playing as he usually did - flying high above the fray, and scanning the air without getting involved in the match.
Fucking typical. Aligning himself with the dirty players, the team that always cheated, but never quite fully committing to it himself.
James scored the first goal, after just three minutes, setting off a round of applause and cheers from the standards. Sirius flew up behind him, knocking a Bludger out of his path.
"Nice one, Prongs!" he yelled.
"Focus on the bloody match!" James laughed.
Sirius only snorted, flying away again.
The match was brutal, as Gryffindor Slytherin matches always were. The other house played dirty, and Sirius was sorely tempted to start committing a few fouls himself. The only thing stopping him was he knew that if he did, James would have his arse.
And not in the fun way like Moony did.
Fucking Remus. Why'd Sirius have to go and put his foot in his mouth this morning? He kind of wished Remus was watching him play - Sirius was playing well, he wanted Remus to see that. Maybe compliment him afterwards, say he was the best Beater that Hogwarts had ever seen, something like that.
As the game continued, it was clear that Gryffindor had the edge, and after playing for an hour, the score was 100-60. But that meant it was still anyone's game, and it was becoming more and more likely that everything would come down to who caught the Snitch.
The Slytherins had clearly come to the same conclusion; the Slytherin Beaters started sending more and more Bludgers at Maledon, until eventually Marlene had to essentially become her bodyguard, following Maledon around like a shadow as Maledon searched for the Snitch.
Sirius stuck to attacking the Slytherin Chasers, at one point sending both Bludgers their way in quick succession to avoid them scoring a goal. Then he glanced over to Regulus, and his heart sunk - Reg's gaze was focused, his eyes narrowed on what could only be the Snitch, and Sirius had just sent both Bludgers flying in the wrong direction.
It was like it happened in slow motion. Regulus leaned forward, but just before he began to dive, he froze. He let out a peculiar, high-pitched squeak. His face became strained and pale, perhaps even mortified, his eyes widened in shock, and he hovered there in the air, not moving at all.
Sirius frowned, wondering if this was some diversionary tactic. But nothing happened, and the fright on Reg's face looked real, his broom clamped painfully tight between his legs.
The whole ordeal couldn't have lasted more than a few seconds. Then Sirius heard the commentator announce that Gryffindor had caught the Snitch, and whatever had come over Regulus passed as suddenly as it had started.
Sirius was so elated that he didn't bother questioning it. He began to descend, and couldn't resist landing next to Regulus as all the players returned to the ground, just to rub the git's face in it.
"See that, Reggie?" he taunted in his little brother's ear. "You'll always be on the losing team."
Regulus only glared at him, spitting on the ground in anger - a move Walburga would have found completely undignified. "Only because you had outside help," he hissed angrily. "Thought your lot were all about fairness. "
"What the fuck are you on about?"
"Your half-breed charity case," Regulus shot back, looking up at one of the stands purposefully. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised what filth like that will lower themselves to."
Sirius whipped around, and there he was.
Even from such a distance, Sirius could see the proud, mischievous grin on Remus' face as he stared back, despite being slightly knocked about by the hordes of students all trying to descend. Remus gave the two of them a patronising little wave, practically glowing with smugness.
Immediately, Sirius forgot all about Regulus, and all about celebrating with the team, and set off at a run towards the stand. He pushed past all the spectators descending down the staircase, all the people trying to high-five him and pat his back, fighting his way up the rickety staircase as fast as he possibly could. He was almost at the top, far past everyone trying to leave, panting and red-faced, when he reached Remus, who was hobbling down at a far slower pace than everyone else.
Sirius came to a stop, just gazing at him in silence for a moment. "You came," he said finally, out of breath.
"Yeah," Remus said with a cocky smile. "Lucky I did too, or we might not have won."
"What did you do?"
Remus winked at him. "Just a little Urinamas right after he spotted the Snitch," he said casually, leaning against a bannister. "Reckon he was too busy trying not to piss himself to do anything else."
Sirius burst out in shocked laughter, the expression on Regulus' face suddenly making so much sense. "Merlin, Moony!" he exclaimed. "You're unbelievable!"
Remus chuckled. "Don't you dare tell Prongs!" he said warningly. "As far as he's aware, Gryffindor won thanks to all their training, okay?"
"Our secret," Sirius promised. He glanced around - they were alone on the staircase, they had been for their whole conversation. He could still hear celebrations going on in the distance, but the voices were already far away, and fading.
He stepped closer, grabbing Remus' jumper and pulling him in. "Thank you for coming," he whispered against Remus' lips.
"It's alright," Remus said quietly. "Sorry for being such a bitch this morning. Blame the moon."
Sirius grinned, feeling Remus' breath hit his face. "Sorry for being such an awful boyfriend and trying to look after you."
"Yeah, it's real annoying."
"Ha!" Sirius laughed, and then closed the little distance left, kissing Remus hungrily, knotting his hands up in Remus' jumper and holding them together. Remus kissed him back with just as much enthusiasm, cupping Sirius' face in his hands and snaking his tongue into Sirius' mouth, unrelenting and claiming and so, so delightful.
"I really can't believe you," Sirius murmured when he pulled back.
"Why not?" Remus smirked. "I'm a Marauder, aren't I?"
"Oh yes, you're a fucking stellar Marauder, Re. I know that, but you still manage to surprise me."
"Hm, probably a good thing." Remus' thumb stroked Sirius' cheekbone lightly. "Can't have you getting bored," he said teasingly.
"Now, that would be impossible."
Remus grinned, kissing him once more. "I saw the whole thing, you played great," he said, his eyes sincere. "And you looked fucking fit the whole time as well."
"Oh yeah?" Sirius asked elatedly.
"Yeah, all the girls nearby were drooling over you."
"Aw, were you jealous?"
"Nah," Remus replied, looking devastatingly relaxed. One of his hands fell to the collar of Sirius' robes and he tugged it down, exposing the large, blooming hickey from the night before, at the junction between his neck and collarbone. "They can fantasise all they want," he said, "we both know you're mine."
Sirius shivered, feeling slightly light-headed. "Dorm. Right now," he croaked, already turning away and rushing down the stairs.
"Uh..." Remus hesitated, "I dunno if I can..."
Sirius glanced back, meeting Remus' eyes. "I'll do all the work," he said. "Need you. Now."
Remus sucked in a breath, staring at Sirius. "Yeah," he said in a low voice, "yeah, okay, let's go."
Sirius threw his head back in laughter, reaching for Remus' hand and dragging him along.
a/n-
one word... simps