Carter's POV
I'm in love with her. I figured it out today at school. Right now, it's last period and I'm with Mark.
"Mark, I need you to start giving me therapy again." He looked up at me surprised.
"You do?" I laughed and nodded. "Did Noel tell you you needed it? If she did, that means it's getting bad." I shook my head.
"No, I realized that it's getting bad." I sighed. "Every time one of those guys looks at Noel like a piece of meat, or if they try to flirt, it makes me want to beat their ass. I just get enraged by it, because I think what if she leaves me for someone else? What if she doesn't really love me." He squinted his eyes at me, then nodded.
"You keep thinking what if she's like Jessica. And not in the way that she'll beat you up, or get someone to. That she'll say she loves you but she doesn't. She'll leave you or hurt you like Jessica did. But this time it'd be worse, and you know it." I nodded.
"I'm in love with her. I wasn't in love with Jessica, I just thought it was nice that she loved me. Though I did like her a lot." He smiled widely.
"So you finally admit that you love her?" I nodded laughing.
"Mark, at first it wasn't the fact that I didn't want to admit it. I just didn't know. Then, today, I was scared because I almost told her, even though I wasn't ready. I still didn't think I was. But then, once again, someone had to show me that I could lose her. Then I realized that I love her." He clapped and squealed.
"My little sister finally had her first love. Oh my gosh, you have to tell your Mom and Luke! They have to know! They'll be so happy."
"I haven't even told her yet, I should tell her first. You know you're always the one I come to first unless Amy beats it out of me. Which she kinda did today. In class today, Brett was asking if her boyfriend had fucked up by now and all of that. Then Noel took up for me." I smiled remembering it. "She said that she loved me and that I didn't fuck up. But I know I did. After class, Amy drug me to the bathroom and fussed at me."
It was basically 'Look what you've done to her, she looks horrible. All because you avoided her. What if she decides one day not to take up for you because she's tired. Because you keep fucking up. You need to stop before she gets tired of you and it's over. Step up and be a man. Stop running from her, stop being scared. This whole time you've been telling her your feelings like it's nothing, and now you're acting like a coward. I swear you and Alex are both stupid and suck at relationships.' But don't worry, she still really likes Alex. She's just frustrated at her, she fucked up too.
"Seems like it opened your eyes." I nodded.
"I'm going to tell her I love her tonight, over a surprise dinner. Good thing I've earned a key to her house. Now what I need you to do is ask her to go shopping with you or something. Get her away from the house after I leave practice. I need to cook, and get everything ready." He nodded.
"Soo, C... When are you two going to have sex?" I coughed and looked at him confused.
"I'm sure not any time soon." He raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, I'm gay, and I know Noel is very attractive.. You have to be sexually attracted to her, don't lie. I mean sometimes you sleep in a bed with her and she only has on a big shirt and underwear. You'd have on a bra and boxers. One time I walked in on you two kissing under the covers, I thought you were having sex. I mean you were on top of her." I shrugged and he rolled his eyes. I laughed and sighed.
"Okay, so yes I think about it a lot. She gets me.... aroused a lot. But we haven't talked about it, and we haven't ever almost got to that point. It's just making out and we stop way before it gets to that point. Like, I've not seen her with just a bra on. But dammit, sometimes she touches me, and it turns me on. Or she'll just have gotten out of the shower, and her hair's wet, and I think 'hmm, wonder what she looked like in the shower..' It's getting worse to be honest." He gestured for me to keep talking. "I'm definitely not telling you how it's getting worse.. But I'll tell you that I've watched porn to be comfortable and know what to do somewhat. I think she's waiting for me. To take initiative and start it up. I mean she knows I haven't done anything, but she has. So, she probably doesn't want to rush."
"I think so too. Are you going to start it up?"
"When I'm ready." He rolled his eyes.
"Okay. So if we're going to start therapy, when will it be?"
"In this class." He groaned.
"But this is when I hear the gossip about you guys." I laughed and shrugged.
"You'll obviously still hear it, just not here."
"Okay, I guess I'll do it."
"Thanks Marky." He shook his head and laughed.
"Don't mention it asshole. So, have you actually had an altercation with any of these guys over Noel?"
"I've argued with a few about disrespecting their teacher. Not enough for them to realize anything. They all know I'm always a teacher's pet so it's fine."
"Good. Think of it this way Carter. If you fight with anyone over Noel, then they'll know something's up. Right now, it's just arguing. You argue- it's fine, you always argue with people just to do it. But if you fight, it'd be different because you've never fought before. There would be suspicions going around. Carter, to be honest, I don't think you need therapy. I think you just need to learn to trust Noel fully. Don't tell me you do, because if you did, you wouldn't be that mad when a guy or lesbian looks at her. She's told me about it too, this is why I know." I raised an eyebrow. So she knew, but acted like she didn't. "Yeah, and she said they aren't all even looking at her like that. You just immediately think so. Listen, you have got to calm down. Noel doesn't want you fighting over her, she hates when you're mad. She doesn't want to have to be the one who suspends you. Because she obviously can't make an exception for you. Stop being scared and trust Noel. Has she ever made it seem like she was interested in another guy?" I shook my head immediately. I know she hasn't. So why am I doing all of that? "Exactly, want to know why? Because first of all, she's a lesbian. She doesn't like any of those guys. Second of all, she loves you, and it's real. You have to get it through your head that Noel is NOT at all anything like Jessica. Jessica didn't love you. Noel does, and she's taught you that, but you're too stupid to realize it. Carter, I swear if you keep acting stupid, you are going to lose her. First of all, stop letting people take her away, meaning the Alex situation. You shouldn't have told her that she could go off kissing Alex. You should've asked her to be your girl right there. But, at the same time, know who's trying to take her. Don't fight for something that's not there. Those guys don't really want her, and she knows it. It's a game to them, but it's real to you. That's why she's with you. Fight for her when it's needed, not when you just feel threatened. When you go back to New York, and her ex's come back, what are you going to do?"
I never thought about that. I will feel threatened, I know it.
"I'm going to treat them like I first treated Alex when we met. I'm going to be respectful. I understand what you're saying Mark. I need to fight for her, but not literally unless it has to be that way. And I really shouldn't get mad, because I'm the one that has her. But I should still be there for her, and not just let someone come steal her. I'm not going to let her ex's take her from me. I'm going to show her how much I love her, how important she is to me, how beautiful she is, and I'll show her what she deserves. I'll be better than those other losers who let her go, because I won't let her go." He beamed at me proudly.
"That's my little brother. At first you're were being all sissy and girly so you were my little sister, but now, you're my little brother. That's how I like to see you, strong-willed and ready to do whatever it takes to keep your girl, but smart. Stop making rash decisions C. It's not just Noel that doesn't want you to fight. I want the best for you. Now, if I told Luke you were thinking of fighting, you know the situation would be worse right?" I winced thinking of all of the fussing and disappointment that would go on. Literally, he would fuss then he'd tell me how disappointed he was, then fuss and more disappointment.
Mark hugged me tightly and I hugged him back.
"I love you C. Even though we aren't real brothers, it sure seems like it." I squeezed him tightly and nodded.
"I love you too Mark. Thank you for always being the shoulder for me to lean on." I said softly.
"I will, forever. I mean that. I'll always be a phone call away." He sniffed and I chuckled.
"Stop being so sappy and sad Mark." He shrugged.
"It's just that Josh is thinking about moving back to New York after this year, and he asked me to go. I'm thinking about it." My eyes widened and I pulled back.
"What? No, Mark you can't do that. Luke's already moved away and I just got him back. You can't leave me." He looked at me sadly and I shook my head. I got my back pack and ran out of the classroom with tears falling from my eyes.
"Carter! Carter, come back here!" I ignored him and ran to my spot. I didn't go to the court this time. I went to the abandoned janitors closet. I like this place because there's old widgets. I like taking them apart and putting them back together, seeing how they work. There's clocks, radios, and watches. Some of them I brought here. This is where I went freshman year when I got bullied. If I didn't come here, then I'd have a panic attack. This distracted me, I didn't have to think about anything else. Then I went less and less, but sometimes I still come, I never told Mark where it was. He can't find me here. I was playing with a radio now, taking it apart.
But literally less than five minutes after I went in, there was a knock at the door as it opened.
"Mark, go away." I said sniffing, without turning around. I wonder how he found it. A pair of hands wrapped around my waist and I knew who it was. I turned around quickly and wrapped my arms around the top of her shoulders. I put my face in her neck and cried as she rubbed my back.
"He's gonna leave me. He said he's going to move away. He can't do that to me, I need him. What if Jessica gets out? I'll need to talk to him, and he'll be gone. He knows my father's getting out soon, but he's going to leave me anyway. I can't believe him, this is how he tells me. When he knows I'm already opening old wounds. He could've at least let the wounds close up again. I can't imagine him not being around." I said as tears fell down. She just stayed quiet and held me. "I mean, I know it's in a year, but he's been here my whole life. Luke just came back, it was supposed to be all okay now. The three brothers, all together. Why can't he just stay? He knows I cried every night for months when Luke left! He knows how much it hurt me. He and I, we're closer than Luke and I, and it'll be worst! I'll have Luke, Mom, Amy, Kale, and..... you." I looked up at her and stared at her intensely. She grew nervous under my stare and looked down fidgeting. I picked her face up and put my hand on her cheek.
"I'll have you my love. I love you Grace." She looked at me surprised and I kissed her, pouring all of the love into the kiss, and I felt her do the same. It was great; the best one we've had. My stomach was doing somersaults. We pulled away, and I was light headed. She smiled widely at me and kissed me again. These kisses were better because we were in love, and we knew it could only get better from here.
"I love you too Carter." I smiled and wiped the tears from her eyes. Mine had dried already.
"So, I kinda wanted to ask you on a date/dinner tonight at your house. I was going to tell you then, but it kinda seemed right. I guess Mark can leave if he wants. I'll have you to talk to and lean on. This will also make Luke and I even closer I guess. I'll really miss him though. How'd you... Your class?"
"Mark came over to my room and took me into the hall and told me. Then he watched my class. You told me about how you used to go here. I thought you were going to be mad again and hurt yourself." I shrugged.
"Sometimes it's sadness first, then it goes to anger. If you wouldn't have came when you did, it would've gotten there."
"Well I'm glad I came when I did." I smiled.
"Me too. So, about that date? I'll cook for you, spaghetti, but my own sauce? I'll make you some dessert too, and then we can just kiss. Maybe that'll be better than dessert." She laughed and shrugged.
"That sounds great. Except who told you I wanted to kiss you?" I laughed and bumped her softly with my hip.
"You know you like kissing me." She shook her head and pecked my lips.
"I love kissing you baby." I smiled widely and put my forehead on hers. She closed her eyes and sighed.
"I can't wait until New York. Dad's excited to meet you, but he said Mom's ready to give you trouble. I won't let her." I shook my head.
"No, let her say and do what she wants. Please? I just want to try to get her to like me. I think I can." She raised her eyebrow but nodded.
"Okay. I won't interfere." I looked down at my watch.
"You might want to get back to your class. You've got ten minutes left. I'm gonna go ahead and go to practice. Tell Mark I'll talk to him later." She nodded and kissed me once more before leaving.
"I love you." I said as she was about to walk out.
"I love you too." She said looking back smiling as she walked out. I smiled and sighed happily. I got my backpack and walked to the gym.
We've started with actual plays and practice rather than conditioning now. The team's great, we can win. We have a scrimmage coming up soon with a local team. That'll show us how much we've done.
Noel POV
Josh, Mark, and Alex were in my room. Josh and Mark were telling me what to wear, and Alex was sitting there on her phone. I don't even know why Josh came.
"She said casual." I whined.
"But-" Josh tried to say, but Alex interrupted him.
"I was tired of you guys arguing, so I texted Carter on your phone and asked what she was wearing to see. She's wearing jeans and a short sleeve button down."
"Thank you! Now, can I dress myself? Or if you really want to dress me, get me some jeans." I told them. They rolled their eyes.
"Suit yourself." They got out of the way and let me pick my own clothes. I gave them a fake smile and picked out jeans and a nice shirt. I flipped them off as they shook their heads and I went into my bathroom and changed.
I came back into the room and they rolled their eyes.
"What were we here for?" Mark said. I shrugged.
"Alex lives here, you brought Josh and, you told me you needed to talk to me."
"Oh. That's right. Otherwise I'm not helping you again because you never appreciate it." He said fake hurt.
"I appreciated you getting us together. " He rolled his eyes.
"That's all. I've done much more." I shook my head and rolled my eyes.
"You have fifteen minutes." Alex said. My eyes widened and I went into the bathroom to do my hair and fix myself up. Mark followed me and closed the door. I did everything as he talked.
"If I do end up leaving, can you promise me to take care of her? I need to make sure she'll be okay. It's hard for me too, to even think about leaving her. But I need to think about me too."
"Mark, I'll always take care of her. I love her more than anyone else I've been with. I really care about her, I'm not going to hurt her. I'll stick through it all." He smiled and hugged me.
"Thank you for being here for her, and making her happy. I really want everything to go right. I want the best for my little sister." I smiled and squeezed him.
"Don't thank me for that. I want to." The door bell rang and Alex screamed.
"I'll get it. Hurry up." He looked at me.
"I was just kidding, you know you look good right? Even though it's just jeans, could've been better but-"
"Noel!" I shook my head and walked by him into my room and downstairs. Carter was standing by the door getting quizzed by Alex. She had jeans and a navy button up shirt with different color fish on it. I smiled and shook my head. She also had flowers.
"It's not funny! Answer the question and stop laughing. I won't let the date go on." I raised my eyebrow. I swear every single time, Alex starts something with Carter.
"I don't think that'd work. Since when do I take orders from you?" I said. Carter looked at me and smiled.
"It's fine. The answer is no." Alex nodded.
"See how easy that was? You may go by now." She said and got out of her way. Carter walked over to me. She took a deep breath and smiled.
"You look beautiful like always, these are for you." She handed me the flowers and I pulled her into a hug and pecked her lips.
"Thank you Car. These are so nice, I'll need to get a vase for them. You look handsome tonight, with your fish." She laughed and shrugged.
"Blahh! You two are boring. I don't want to be here anymore. Like I said, waste of time. Bye, good luck." Mark said and he and Josh walked out. Alex rolled her eyes.
"Guess I'm going on to Amy's house, can I use your car?" She asked me. I nodded, she got the keys and went to the door.
"Have a good night guys." She said and left. I turned to Carter.
"So what's first?" She smiled.
"We're cooking babe. I've asked Mark to make sure you had everything, and you do. So to the kitchen." She held out her hand for me to hold and I took it.
"I've never said anything about it, but you know, your hands are really big." She laughed and shrugged.
"I guess it's my height. To be honest, I'm nervous. I've not been on many dates, you know." I laughed.
"Just calm down and relax. It'll be fine, and we'll have fun." She smiled and nodded.
"Now, do you like spaghetti and meatballs or spaghetti and sauce? Cheese or no cheese? I didn't ask you the first time, but I just took a guess because I wanted to surprise you. If you don't like sauce, I'll just not make my special sauce."
"Sauce and cheese." I wanted to taste the sauce, plus I do like sauce better.
"Good, me too."
"So what would you have done if I would've said meatballs and no cheese?" She scrunched her nose up.
"Not made it." My mouth fell open and she laughed.
"I'm just messing around. I would've made it, and then try to eat it, but probably not finish. My sauce is great. It's homemade, but since it's secret, I can't make it in front of you."
"But I want to cook with you."
"Okay, maybe I can let you see it. Only because I love you." We laughed and started cooking. We made the meat and the sauce, she did most of it if not all, and now we had to put the noodles on. She put a pot of water on the stove and turned it on high. Then she sat on the counter and patted the space next to her for me to sit.
"So, is New York as cool as everyone says?" I shrugged.
"If you mean crowded and loud yes." She laughed. "I like it though. I kinda miss it too."
"Well we'll be there soon." She said and wrapped her arms around my shoulder. I leaned into her.
"I miss Roberto. I hope he's doing well with Mom. I actually miss her too.." I said sadly.
"She'll come around."
"I don't know, remember I told you about her fighting problem?.. She used to always try to fist fight my girlfriends. They'd end up breaking up with me because of that and she loved it. One actually tried to fight her back. When it happened with Alex, she was surprised because she'd known Alex for so long. She still swung at her and Alex got really mad. I really think she would've done something if she hadn't known my Mom for so long." Carter looked at me with her eyes scrunched up.
"You had the worst girlfriends ever. Honestly." I laughed.
"Maybe but my Mom's pretty crazy." She squinted her eyes and looked at the ceiling.
"You ever thought she was doing it to show you they weren't any good? Which they weren't, because they left you for it, but really. What if she was looking out for you?" I looked up at her in wonder.
"No.. I've never thought of it that way.." She smiled and checked on the noodles. "Maybe you're right Car. You know, Josh never told me how she took it when he told her." She said taking the noodles out.
"Maybe you should ask him. It's ready." I got two plates and put them on the counter.
"How much do you want?" She said putting noodles on my plate.
"Mmm, that's enough." She stopped and put the sauce on top. Then she fixed hers and picked both of them up.
"Where are we eating?"
"Living room." She started walking to the living room. "I do have hands Carter." She laughed.
"I can see that babe. But I'm carrying this for you, because I can." I shook my head and laughed. We got into the living room and she put the plates on the table. She shrugged and sat on the floor in front of the table.
"We're sitting on the floor. I like floors." She said and patted the floor beside her. I sat down and she bowed her head. I did too, and she started praying:
"God is great, God is good, let us thank Him for our food. By His hands we all are fed, give us Lord our daily bread. Amen."
We picked our heads up and started eating.
"What do you think about it?" She asked.
"It's really good. I like it, the sauce is okay." She rolled her eyes and I laughed. "I'm just kidding, it's great. I think it might just be my new favorite."
"I'm glad, I'll be happy to make it for you whenever you like." We ate for a while, and I looked up at her.
"Babe, you said your father gets out soon.. Are you scared?" She shrugged.
"Yeah, he's getting out of prison soon. He's been in for a bit more than 18 years. We don't know what he'll do. I'm just happy I can fight." I was quiet and she looked at me and smiled. "I know, it's hard to reply to. Touchy subject for me, but I can tell you. I'll change the subject. What do you not like in a person? Like what's a total turnoff?" I thought about it.
"Flirting with a lot of girls. Flirting when you have a girlfriend and she's with you, but you ignore her. Someone who thinks they're better than everyone else and puts others down. Bullying." She laughed and bumped me.
"So the first day of school, my first impression was basically a whole turn off. I'm so glad I made up for that, stupid girls. I have to deal with them all the time, them slapping me and trying to touch on me. You know, it's getting worse now because it's getting around that I have a girlfriend. But... did you know that half of them sat there and laughed as I was bullied in middle school? As soon as I joined the basketball team I'm suddenly cute. Amy says they always thought I was cute, they just didn't want to be made fun of too for talking to me. Well, I don't think that's an excuse." I nodded. I hate seeing those girls try to flirt with her. She puts them down quickly though, and I see what she goes through with them
"You're right. It's not an excuse, they didn't want to go through the trouble. It's their fault."
"Yeah, but I'm not worried about them. They just confuse me. I'm focused on you." She said and kissed my cheek as she got up. Then she looked at me.
"Do you actually want dessert? I'm kinda full." She asked. I was actually full too.
"No, I don't. Let's watch a movie." Her eyes got wide and she smiled mischievously.
"Can I pick? Please?" I looked at her suspiciously. "Please babe?" She said poking out her bottom lip. I laughed and shrugged.
"Okay, but I have to agree." She shook her head.
"No, I want to surprise you." I caved in with a little bit more begging and puppy faces. "Yes! Go to the room, I'll be up there." I nodded and went upstairs. I went into my dresser to get something. I got Carter a gift. I mean I have a bracelet from her, she deserves something. Plus, I want her to have something from me. I took it out. I got her a Cartier Love Necklace, because I guess it goes with my bracelet.
She came into the room and she smiled at me as she went to put the CD in. I went behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist and put the box in front of us so she could see it.
"Open it." I said. She took the box and turned around in my arms. She opened it up and her mouth dropped. She beamed at it then looked up at me. She attacked my lips and I moved my arms up to her neck as she put hers on my waist.
"I know it's not original, but I just thought it'd go with mine."
"Baby, I love it. I've never gotten anything from anyone that meant something. Usually the most I get is from Kale's Dad or something for my birthday. But I've obviously never been in love for someone I love to buy me something meaningful. Except now, and I really do like it." It was the white diamond one.
"Now we both have something from each other." She nodded.
"And we can both sit here and watch Hotel Transylvania together because it's my favorite movie right?" I laughed and agreed. "I love you Grace Noel Stewart."
"I love you too Carter Coleman." She groaned.
"You have to say my middle name." She whined. I looked at her confused.
"You said you don't have one." She laughed and shrugged.
"I don't. That's the point." She said and kissed my cheek as she jumped into the bed and threw her shirt off.
"Put it back on."
"Why? You don't want to see my hot body?" I rolled my eyes and blushed.
"Well... to be honest it's kinda distracting and I actually like this movie." I said shyly. She laughed and pulled me into the bed anyway.
"I like this movie too, so if you just concentrate on the movie, it'll be fine. I won't even talk." I whined.
"But I can still feel your bare skin. Carter, you're holding me." She pulled away and I pulled her back quickly. "No, not that I don't want you to hold me, of course I do. I'm just saying you need a shirt on." She laughed and nodded.
"Okay, well can I just let go and get the shirt then?" I nodded and she got up to put the undershirt on this time. It was a wife beater and to be honest, it wasn't much help. But I wasn't going to say anything. She got back into the bed and wrapped her arms around me.
"That better?" I shrugged and she laughed. She grabbed the remote and pressed play.
"You do know that I'm going to talk now because I have the shirt on. You know I can't watch movies without making comments the whole time." I laughed and kissed her cheek.
"I know babe. I'm just happy to be here with you." She smiled and kissed my forehead and we watched the movie.
In the middle of the movie she looked at me and smiled,"Baby, you're my zing." I blushed and nodded.