" Keep on dreaming, don't stop breathing, fight those demons
Sell your soul, not your whole self
Oh, if they see it when you're sleeping, make them leave it "
(tw- panic attack)
--CHAPTER EIGHTEEN--
April 4, 1978
Tuesday
At Hogwarts, the days turned into weeks, and as soon as Arabella knew it, it was April. Throughout the past months, she had split her time between tutoring and training. During school hours, she would spend time in her classroom tutoring upper and lower classmen alike. Then after dinner, she would make her way over to the centaur colony. It was not safe for her to walk around the grounds after hours, so Dumbledore had arranged for a centaur, whether it was Firenze, Bane, or another member, to walk her to and from the castle.
Arabella would have weekly update meetings with Dumbledore, mostly about training but with the next prospect of hopefully getting the first Horcrux that month.
Speaking about training, Arabella had significantly improved, not yet moving on from fire, but she hadn't burnt her pants off again. She had become more in touch with her emotions, having better control of them and herself overall. She had fewer nightmares and panic attacks. Arabella was feeling more like herself.
She had been spending her free time with the marauders and the girls, though it was a lot less than she would like. With NEWTS coming up, they spent most of their time in the library. They would come to Arabella's room, but it was usually their designated study time. She was glad that they didn't ask about her order things, but she knew that they had questions on the tip of their tongue, just waiting to ask them.
Evan and Regulus would also stop by but seeing as they were only sixth years, they would have a lot more free time to spare. Arabella could sense that they wanted to say something to her, something important. They would seek little glances with each other and pass notes, but she didn't want to pressure them into telling her.
Talking about the Blacks, Sirius had been a little distant from her. Whenever she was near, he would become withdrawn. Arabella had thought that it was just the stress of the school, but the way the other marauders would look at them told her a completely different story; she just hoped that he would come clean soon.
----
It was an ordinary Tuesday morning when Arabella was walking back to her classroom. She had gone to visit Dumbledore for a private meeting to finally talk about the events that happened during the first war. She explained to him how Voldemort would start picking off order members one by one until they were all gone. She listed them off as they went; the McKinnon family, Dorcas Meadows, Benji Fenwick, the Prewett twins, the Bone's family, Lily and James Potter all died in 1981.
Except for Regulus Black, who died in 1979, and Evan Rosier, who died in 1980. The only other family she knew about were the Longbottom's, but they weren't precisely killed, more like tortured to insanity, but that won't be happening this time around. They started out planning on ways to prevent deaths and stricter security measures to ensure the members' safety. They also ended up talking about Horcruxes and how finally they were going to get one; the Diadem of Ravenclaw. Dumbledore had scheduled another meeting within the next week with the usual people to get the Horcrux.
She was walking the quiet halls. It was after the last class of the day, so the students would either be in their common rooms or outside enjoying the nice spring weather. Well, that's what Arabella thought until she heard shouting from the main courtyard. She pulled out her wand and immediately ran outside to see what was happening. In the middle of the grass stood the four marauders and four Slytherin boys, all with their wands out, ready to fight.
"What are you going to do, Snivellus? Do you even know how to use your wand?" mocked Sirius.
Arabella faltered for a moment. Up till that point, Arabella hadn't had the pleasure of meeting her old potions professor. He still had the greasy hair, hooked nose, and the usual sneer on his face that she remembered. When Snape wasn't alone, he was with his Slytherin friends, never mixing with other houses. He was usually with Alec Avery. He was a very tall, blonde boy, known for being very sadistic around the school. Then there was Thomas Mulciber. Also, a pureblood Slytherin, known for openly praising the dark lord, having already joined his ranks. Then finally, there was Barty Crouch Jr. Arabella had already met the short, brunette boy, and she knew that he was not someone to be messed with.
"Come on, Sirius! Just let us hex that mudblood, and we all move on," sneered Avery.
James turned red, "Don't fucking call her that!" he roared.
Mulciber laughed, "Or what, Potter? Going to hit us with a bat boggy hex?"
James was about to shout a spell when Arabella intervene.
"What the hell is going on here?" she asked, looking around at all the boys.
"Crouch called Mary the m-word and tried to hex her for accidentally bumping into him," said Remus.
Arabella whirled around to look at the four Slytherin boys, "That word will never be tolerated in this school; do I make myself clear?" she said, her voice slightly rising every time she spoke.
Mulciber rolled his eyes, "You can't give us orders! You're not even a teacher. And that mudblood deserves everything that's coming to her. And it's going to be worse than name-calling."
At this point, Arabella was furious; if the students were paying close attention, they would have seen that her eyes flashed a dangerous shade of red.
"I can and will give you orders—fifty points from Slytherin, each. And I want you all to go straight to your head of house, now!" she barked, narrowing her eyes at the four pompous boys, leaving everyone stunned with her temper.
Arabella clenched her jaw and watched all the boys leave. She turned around to address the Gryffindors. She didn't even notice the nonverbal curse Avery sent their way, hitting Sirius square in the chest. He let out a painful groan and dropped to the floor. His shirt was instantly soaked with crimson blood, and his eyes started fluttering shut.
"Sirius!" yelled James, running to help his friend, Arabella, doing the same.
"James, I need you to move and go tell Poppy that Sirius had been hurt," she said. But he wasn't listening, "JAMES! NOW!" she yelled, successfully getting the boy's attention. Once he was gone, Arabella started levitating Sirius gently off the grass. All the students were watching the situation go down with shocked expressions. She told Remus and peter to come with her to the hospital wing.
Getting to the wing, Arabella found Madam Pomfrey in a frenzy by moving in and out of her private office and preparing a bed.
"Bring him here, Arabella!" she said, beckoning them over to the last bed in the corner.
Arabella put him down on the bed but didn't move when Pomfrey started to cut his shirt to get a better look at the injuries. Tearing off his shirt, they all let out gasps at what they saw. Three long cuts were running down his stomach, similar to the ones Arabella had the first time she got there.
"Oh my," said Madam Pomfrey, running to grab her potions.
Arabella stood there in a daze looking at Sirius. Tears slipped from her eyes because of how familiar the moment felt. All the blood and panic brought back memories that she had longed buried in the back of her mind. Arabella wanted to help in any way she could. She was skilled at healing spells, but she knew those wouldn't work against dark magic. She could practically feel the magic pulsating out of Sirius's body.
Dark magic? Maybe I could... she thought.
She doesn't know what possessed her to do what she did next.
Arabella rolled up her sleeves and tenderly placed her hands on his stomach.
Sirius let out a strangled groan.
"Miss Goldstein! Get your hands away from the cuts; you could infect them!" Madam Pomfrey yelled.
Arabella ignored her and continued to mumble soothing words to Sirius under her breath.
"I'm sorry, this might hurt." she sobbed quietly.
Peter, James, and Remus watched from afar, confused. James was about to ask her what she was doing, but Remus held him back, knowing she would try something.
She closed her eyes in concentration. She focused on Sirius and the magic within his cuts. She visualized him getting better, being healed. Arabella remembered all the centaurs had taught her about control and possession. She knew what she was doing was risky, not for Sirius but herself, but she didn't care.
Arabella opened her eyes once more, and the boys and Madam Pomfrey saw how her eyes turned bright gold then pitch black. The veins in her hand started to glow a dark red, like the blood on the wound, like the first time she releases magic. Arabella felt a pang of pain in her stomach but quickly subsided in a soft sting.
She looked down to see that Sirius was still covered in blood, but his wounds were completely healed; the only thing that was left were three identical pale scars. She took her hand off his body and stared at them in shock. She looked up to see Remus, Peter, James, and Madam Pomfrey were all as dumbfounded as she was.
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry." Arabella muttered quietly under her breathe with tears running down her face, "I'm sorry."
James went up to Arabella slowly, "Hey, Bella, it's alright. You healed him, see," he said as he wrapped his arm around her and pointed to Sirius.
Arabella's eyes snapped toward a newly healed Sirius. His eyes were barely open, but she could see the concern in them, not for himself but for her. She managed a weak smile, but then she looked down at her hands again. Her eyes widened with images of the war flashing before her. Arabella felt like she couldn't breathe, as if the whole world was crashing down on her. Her knees became so weak that she lost her footing and would have fallen if James had caught her. Her eyes were fixated on her blood-stained hands. She sobbed and choked, and the others in the room didn't know how to help her.
"Breathe. Shhh, it's alright. Let it out." James whispered to her.
So she did.
She cried until she physically couldn't anymore. James held her for hours until Arabella calmed down. They sat on the cold floor as he rocked her back and forth and whispered soothing words into her ear.
Remus and Peter watched from the sidelines as their friends comforted each other. It pained them to see Arabella so sad, so broken. Madam Pomfrey had left the hospital wing after cleaning Sirius's body and giving him pain potions. She went to get Benji, McGonagall, and Dumbledore, most likely to tell them the events of that day.
And Sirius, he watched like an outsider. He had felt no pain from the cuts. It only hurt to see Arabella on the floor sobbing and him not being able to comfort her. He wanted to be there for her but was glad James had stepped up and held her in her time of need.
Arabella's hands started to shake, "Please get it off." She pleaded quietly.
James looked at her in confusion, "Get what off?"
"The blood. Please." She cried.
Slowly James pulled out his wand and pointed it at her hands. He muttered, "Scourgify."
James grabbed a hold of both her hands and brought them up to her eyes so she could see they were clean. Arabella slowly inspected every inch of her skin. Once she found no more signs of blood, she stood up from the floor.
"Thank you." She said sincerely, suddenly feeling embarrassed about the whole thing. "I'm sorry for breaking down like that. Blood... it just hard to look at," she sniffled, looking down at her shoes in shame.
"Bella, you don't have to explain yourself. It's alright." Remus said while he came over to hug her. Peter also walked over and gave her a small smile and a piece of chocolate that he had in his school bag.
She turned her attention towards Sirius, who was silently watching the whole thing.
Arabella walked over to him, "How are you feeling?" she asked quietly.
Sirius was shocked, "I feel like I should be asking you that... but I'm fine, thanks to you."
"No problem," she murmured, still confused about how she did it.
Sirius couldn't take his eyes off her, "How did you do that?" he whispered.
Arabella shook her head, "I don't know. I've never done that before."
Sirius got up, still, soar from the cuts, but he threw his arms around her small frame.
"Thank you. You saved me."
Arabella squeezed her eyes shut and held him back with equal force. She was glad she could help Sirius, but she could already feel the dark magic swirling around in her body.
The hospital wing doors slammed opened to reveal two worried Slytherin boys.
"Sirius?" Regulus called out, slightly out of breath.
Sirius let go of Arabella and turned to his brother.
"Yea, Reggie?" he asked innocently.
Regulus stomped over to his brother with Evan in tow, "Don't 'yes Reggie' me! Someone told me you died!" his eyes shimmering with unshed tears.
Sirius grabbed his little brother's shoulders, "Hey, now, it will take a lot more than a curse from Avery to kill me." he said while he brought him into a hug.
Evan hurried over to Arabella's side.
"Are you alright? I heard you were in the middle of it all."
Arabella gently grabbed hold of his hand, "I'm fine. Don't worry about me."
James, Peter, and Remus all walked up to the couple.
"Hey, do you guys wanna get out of here? I say we leave them alone," said Remus, while he nodded over to the Black brothers who were having a hushed conversation.
Arabella smiled at the boys and nodded. She turned her focus over to Evan to see the faint blush on the boy's cheeks. She followed his line of vision and saw that he was looking directly at Remus.
Wait a minute. She thought while her brain put the pieces together.
Arabella nudged Evan slightly and gave him a cheeky grin. He playful narrowed his eyes at her and led her to the exit with the others.
"Bells, wait!" Sirius called her back.
Arabella whirled around to see Sirius slowly walking up to her.
"Yeah?"
Sirius fiddled with the hem of his shirt, "I just wanted to say thank you again."
She was about to dismiss him, but he cut her off, "No Bells, I mean it. Whatever you did, thank you."
"It's alright, Sirius." She mumbled. Then he did something unexpected. He gently cradled her head and brought his lips to her cheek. He lingered on her face for a moment until he pulled back. Arabella was cursing the room for being so bright be she was sure he could see the heat rising from her neck to her cheeks.
"I'll see you later, alright?" He whispered hopefully.
Arabella didn't trust her voice, so she just sent him a timid smile. He fully let go of her, and she wasted no time in practically running out of the room. When she got to the doors, Remus, James, Peter, and Evan looked at her with knowing grins.
Before anyone could tease her, she pointed a menacing finger in their faces, "Not. A. Word." She gritted through her teeth.
All the boys laughed at her and put their hands up in surrender. They were almost the great hall when Benji came into view.
"Arabella, Dumbledore wants to talk with you." He said softly. Arabella simply nodded and wished the boys a good day and followed Benji in silence, knowing exactly what the headmaster wanted to talk about.
----
vote&comment:)
afraid by the neighbourhood