look at me | wroetoshaw

Chapter 37

hopefully there should be another chapter before christmas but just in case there isn't - i hope you all have a lovely festive season! stay safe, don't be reckless and wear a mask!!

"Have you thought about what kind of wedding you want?" Harry asks randomly, around noon on a Sunday in September. 

"No?" I replied questioningly, briefly looking up from my phone. "Have you?"

"Kind of...I mean, we haven't talked about it...about any of it really," he says back, and I put my phone down now because I sense that this is going to be a long conversation. 

"Okay," I said slowly, drawing it out. "What exactly do you want to talk about? I didn't think we were in a rush for it?"

"Oh no! We aren't...but I just thought it would be nice to have some sort of idea when, and what theme we'd be going for...you know?

"So what you're telling me is...you want to plan our wedding...right now?" I chuckle, leaning forward and eyeing him up. "Alright, then. I'm not too fussed about our wedding...as long as I have Simon walking me down the aisle I don't care what else happens," I say with a smile. 

"That's all you want? Simon to walk you down the aisle?"

"Well yeah, what did you want me to say? I'm not fussed! Whatever you want, I will love."

"So what you're telling me is I can plan the wedding? You really don't care?" He asks, and he seems so bewildered about it. 

"Yeah! It's like you're expecting me to be high maintenance...have you been paying attention to our relationship the last four years?" I say sarcastically. 

"Oh, behave. But this is our wedding! This is one of the biggest moments of our lives, I just thought you'd wanna have more input, that's all. But if you want me to plan it, of course I will."

"Well I'm not gonna leave all the stress to you, I will find a way to help, I'm sure of it...we can plan it together, come up with some ideas, like, what flavour cake do you want? Chocolate? Vanilla?"

"Red velvet," he replied, licking his lips as he did. "I love red velvet, can we please get red velvet?"

"Of course we can get red velvet...when we find a date and shit we can go cake testing...I've always wanted to do that," I say, remembering the various wedding shows I grew up watching. 

"Cake testing? What the fuck is cake testing?" 

God, this man was clueless. 

"I mean, it's kind of in the name, idiot. Oops," I said, holding my stomach before covering my mouth. "Silly," I corrected, Harry and I sharing a quick moment. We'd agree to try and swear less, and just generally use less bad words from now on, but it hadn't been working that well...

"We actually get to go round testing cakes? For our wedding?"

"Yes...I can't believe you didn't know that...what did you watch on tv when you were younger?"

"I didn't watch TV, I played video games," he corrected me. 

Of course he did. 

"Well anyway, we'll go cake testing for the flavour and all that, and as long as you're happy, that's the cake sorted," I said happily. Maybe wedding planning wasn't as stressful as it seemed. 

"Well the big question is when do we want to have the wedding?" He asks. The big question. 

The big question that none of us had even the vaguest answer for.