𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐔𝐒 [𝐓.𝐊]

Chapter 8

Tamen Appetitus

Still Craving

Taehyung was left alone. And, slowly, he began to feel cold.

He only had a couple of seconds of blissful happiness when he saw Jungkook leaving before the smile faded from his face. Realization hit him like a tree and he clutched his handkerchief in his tight fist as he wondered...

What had he done?

He'd known what he wanted and he still made the mistake he promised himself he wouldn't make. Just this morning he told himself to have caution when talking to Jungkook and now... they weren't friends. They were worse than that.

His heart tightened and so did the hand holding the thin fabric; the one he used to dry Jungkook's tears, the hand he used to hold his beautiful face.

Taehyung had been free of rules and worries, free of titles and expectations when he was with Jungkook. His whole attention had been pulling itself towards that one person, and even if he tried to keep his feet on the ground, it was impossible to fight against such heavenly winds.

So many things were wrong and could go wrong, he could end up hurting the two people he most cares about if he let himself be selfish and yet... a lump rose in his throat.

He longed for it.

He'd dreamed of it for as long as he'd lived. The simple thought of losing the opportunity to take hold felt like losing his family all over again.

Jungkook was mostly a mystery. Taehyung couldn't understand the pull he felt toward him, and he also couldn't stop it. He didn't want to stop it. Therein likes his mistake. He should be the responsible one, the teacher, the father of two, and put his foot down in the name of keeping not only his children but Jungkook safe as well. Now that his head was cleared of Jungkook's magic, he knew what he had to do. For their safety. For Jungkook's safety.

Taehyung turned around to take his briefcase... and then he noticed Jungkook's sketchbook beside it. Taehyung kneeled in front of it and took it softly in his hands. A tear rolled down his cold cheek.

It caught him by surprise. He lifted his hand to dry it and noticed the handkerchief still in his hold. Then another tear fell. And then another.

He clutched at his chest with that same handkerchief in hand, feeling like his heart might tear open.

The truth lies within these tears. He didn't want to get away from Jungkook. Not even if it was right. Not even if it would be safer. The way he looked at him, talked to him, held him with delicate hands, artist's hands, scarred hands; the way he desperately clings to him as if he was his savior, the light that would end the night that was his life, and the way he said his name, rejecting his title, wishing to be with the person inside the suit and tie.

Jungkook will be his doom. He already was. One morning was all it took for him to have him kneeling in his own tears. His beauty, his mystery, the guy that chose him and was determined to keep him will be the reason he lives and dies if he refuses to stand back up this instant. Because Taehyung knows what infatuation feels like, and this is not it. He knows this will not be fleeting if he crosses the line and remains on his knees.

But even if they could play pretend that the rules don't apply on hidden corners, that won't keep them safe for long.

Save, save. Safety sounded like chains sliding across the floor.