Number 47 | ON-GOING

CHAPTER 24

Quick Lapse

DMITRI.

I woke up in the morning forgetting everything. I didn't even knew why I was here. I don't know what was I fighting for.

Teka, ano nga ba ang pinaglalaban ko?

I didn't even remember what had happened yesterday when I passed out.

It's just that. . . I'm lost somewhere I don't even know.

Despite the oblivion of everything happened yesterday or the past few days, week, and months, or years, all I can groped inside my head was that me and my familiy was downtrodden by Homer Duque, a Police Lieutenant Colonel. There's no way I can forget his bloody name. Ang pugitang 'yon. . .

And by remembering that traumatic past again, a tear escape from my eyes, then I let myself sob as I bury my face on the pillow. The only thing that was with me when I'm alone. I cried and cried, longing for the presence of my family beside me. Namimiss ko na sila. . .

Bakit pa ba ako nandito? Bakit pa ba ako nabuhay? Ayoko nang ganito. Ayaw ko ditong mag-isa sa napakamalamig at malungkot na kwartong ito. Naaalala ko lang sa kwartong ito ang karanasan ko noon mula sa mga kamay ni Homer. He tied me on a metal chair using thick and heavy chains. He even electrized me with a high voltage after pouring a cold, cold water to me. Ayoko na. . .

I turned to the other side of the bed, and was shocked when I saw a blurry figure of a woman wearing a nurse's uniform. It wasn't really necessarily a nurse uniform, but a white skirt and blouse.

Immediately wiping my tears because of embarrassment, I rise up quickly and leaned closely to the wall while hugging my knees.

Napalunok ako, "s-sino ka? A-anong g-ginagawa mo dito? 'Wag m-mo akong p-patayin."

Nakatingin lang sa akin ang magandang babae sa mga mata niyang nanunubig. I can see happiness from her eyes but at the same time, loneliness.

"D-Dmitri," she mentioned my name, voice slowly cracking and tried to reach her hand to my cheek but she stopped midway when I avoided her with a little fright. Doon na niya pinakawalan ang mga luhang pinipigilan niya.

Sino ang magandang babae? Bakit kilala niya ako? At bakit siya umiiyak?

Tinignan ko lang ang magandang babae habang umiiyak siya. She lift her left hand to cover her mouth, while her right hand was still on top of the bed, clenched into a fist.

Sino ba kasi ang babeng ito?! At anong ginagawa niya rito?! Papatayin niya rin ba ako gaya ng ginawa ni Homer sa pamilya ko?!

Dahil sa isipin iyon, ay nagalit ako sa babae. "Sino ka bang magandang babae ka?! Papatayin mo ba ako? Sige, gawin mo nang sa matapos na ang problema ko!"

Kung papatayin niya talaga ako, sana hindi niya akong hinintay pa na magising at sinaksak na lang ako sa puso. Sa paraang iyon, hindi na ako maghihirap pa araw-araw.

I don't want my last sanity becomes an ash just because of remembering my traumatic past. I won't let the last piece of my heart becomes a black hole, wandering alone on the astronimical landscape. I don't want the beast to consume what's left inside me; my last hope on living.

At kapag papatayin ako ng magandang babae ngayon, maililigtas ko pa ng sarili ko mula sa pagkakalunod sa kadiliman.

"Ano pang ginagawa mo d'yan?! Patayin mo na ako!" Sigaw ko pa sa babae na patuloy pa rin sa pag-iyak. I rearranged myself, came close to her and quickly grabbed her arm to make her face me. She was still looking down at her feet while crying. May mamamatay tao bang iyakin?!