Hostage

If I Have You

Twenty minutes ago, I would have been excited for the life of me.

Nineteen minutes ago, I would have leaped for joy because Keenan being vulnerable in front of me was one thing I had always wanted.

Eighteen minutes ago, I would have yes without even second guessing.

And I still could.

I still could if he hadn't made a complete fool out of me. I could if he hadn't let me make a complete fool out of myself.

I could say that my mother was to blame for everything that happened. I could say that she didn't always make the best choices and that she would have wanted me to stay with him. I could say it over, and over again until I believed it. I could say that he had only done it for his family, and that he wasn't a bad person.
I could say that he would never hurt me, I could say that I would stay because I loved him, and because he loved me too. Because he wanted me to stay, because he asked me to.

If he hadn't made a fool out of me.

Opening my eyes slowly, I sniffed and then turned to face him. I flicked my tongue over my lower lip, running my fingers quickly over my dress when a tear drop fell on it, leaving a water stain mark.

"The detective said that you were sending huge amounts of money into Izzy's account." I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "He said Isabel visited your office frequently. He said she was in a bad mood most of the time when she left." I faked a smile, placing my hands nervously on my thigh. "A-and I told him that you weren't responsible for her death." I bit down on my lower lip. "I told him that you were with me around the time of Isabels murder and that you had nothing to do with it. 'I want justice for Izzy just as much as you do.' I said that to him. And I told you that Mrs. Brown was going through a serious problem with depression." I said, chocking back a sob as I raised a shaky hand to wipe my tears away. "Keenan, tell me you had nothing to do with it and I promise to stay by your side no matter what ." I sobbed, breathing through my mouth as I finally turned to face him. "Tell me that the detective was wrong and that I didn't let Isabels murderer walk free that day." I slurred, my eyebrows narrowing. "Tell me that I was right for believing in you." I watched him open his mouth to say something and then shut it before he flicked his tongue over his lower lip.

"Kimberly-" He started.

" 'You were right for believing in me.' Say that." I cut him off. I watched him lower his gaze and then run his fingers through his hair, tears filling his eyes. I'd never seen him look so helpless, so defeated.

"I can expla-" He started

"'The detective was wrong.' Say that, Keenan!" I added, raising my voice a little. "'You didn't make a mistake.'" I breathed. "Say it." I added.

"Kimberly, I can explain." He started and I winced, feeling my heart shatter because I found my answer in his hesitation.

I was wrong.

I was wrong and the detective had been right.

Fuck!

I had vouched for him.

Trusted him blindly.

I had let the murderer walk scot free.

I could feel the walls tighten around me, as everything else faded out into oblivion, Keenan's next words barely audible as I turned to face him, his very existence a blur as tears clouded my vision.

"Open the door, Keenan." I muttered weakly. "Open the goddamn door." I sobbed.

"Hear me out first-"

"Open the goddamn door Keenan!" I told him, finality in my voice as I looked away. He was quiet for a few seconds before I heard the doors click open and the moment I did, I pushed the doors open and I climbed down.

And I was running towards the gate.

Away from him.

He didn't chase me, no. I doubt he even alighted from the car. It was as though he had expected my reaction, like he had been waiting for it all along.

And as sad as it was that I couldn't stay, that I had reacted just like he had expected me to, I was sickened by his story to the point that I could feel bile rising in my throat but I held it down.

I kept it all down until I was out the gates, off Keenan's property.

And then I let it out.

I bent over and then emptied the contents of my stomach to the ground.

Roxi's POV

"Fuck!" Will breathed, rising up so he was standing on his feet. He stood still with both hands on his waist, his face morphed to show the horror he was feeling inside. "Fuck, Xi!" He exclaimed, looking down at me and I stared back at him, my face tear-stained and my mouth parted slowly. To be honest, it was impressive that he had been able to sit still, listen and not interrupt me even once until I finished.

I was fully aware that our marriage contract would expire in less than a month. And if he decided to leave me afterwards,I would completely understand.

But I wished for him to stay.

I wished that he would say something other than curse.

He turned away from me, both hands still on his waist and then took a step forward before he stopped and then turned back to face me.

"Roxi, I- " He paused, his eyebrows furrowing and I stared back at him, awaiting his judgement.

At this point, I didn't even care if he judged me, just as long as he would stay afterwards.

"Shit!" He cursed under his breath before he took a step towards me, and then another, bending down so he could close the distance between us. "Attorney Gonzalez." He breathed, meeting my gaze once more. "I'm going to call him, Xi. H- He has to do something. If there's a way around this, if there's a way t-that we can fix this, he will have the answers."