To America

Chapter 35

Clarke's POV

"Engagement?" Lexa asks me with a shocked expression, "you're getting engaged... to Bellamy?"

"Lexa, it's not what you think." I shake my hand and walk closer to her. She backs away from me and puts her hand out, telling me to stop.

"What is it like, Klark? Was that just a petty kiss?" Lexa asks me and I shake me head.

"No! No that what's a petty kiss, Lexa." I shake my head and get closer to Lexa.

"You're right, petty isn't the right word. Goodbye. A goodbye kiss." Lexa turns to the window.

"Lexa wait!" I grab her arm while she has her legs out the window. She turns her face to look at me and I can't help but kiss her.

When I pull away she just stares at me. Her eyes show so much. Anger, love, trust, hurt. Lexa and I stare at each other for a moment before I speak.

"Can we go somewhere else?" I ask and Lexa nods. I grab a unlit lamp as she leaves through the window and then helps me out of it. I take her hand while she holds me steady on the roof. She then stops by at tree that has a branch that is close to the roof.

"You are going to have to jump and trust me." Lexa says as she jumps over to the branch. She lands perfectly as she holds onto the branch above her. I look down at the ground in between the branch and roof.

The branch isn't too thick. I don't know how Lexa landed so gracefully. I take a deep breath and then jump to the branch. I feel Lexa wrap one arm around my waist as she holds me steady on the branch.

Lexa helps me down the tree. I give her a warm smile and take her hand. She looks down at your intertwined fingers and smiles, "Lets escape for a little. Let me explain what happened." I whisper to her. I don't want to be caught. All she does is nod and pull me towards the forest.

We stop before we enter the woods. Lexa pulls out so matches from her pocket and helps me light the lamp. Lexa holds the lamp in her left hand and I hold her right hand.

We walk through the woods. Lexa tells me when I need to step over roots and she helps me navigate through the trees. She stops by one tree and sits down. The lamp is placed next to her. Her back leans against the tree as she looks up at me. Lexa pats the ground in between her legs.

I sit in between her legs and lean against her body. I don't want to hurt her so I look back to assure myself she is okay. Lexa nods at me like she can read her mind. My back leans against the front of her body and I blush at the thought and feeling of our bodies pressing together.

Lexa puts her hands on her legs but I take them and put her hands on my lap. I should probably start explaining.

"Bellamy and I went for a walk... he was talking about stupid little power hungry things." I start. This has nothing to do with the story but Lexa is listening while I trace my finger over the scars on her hands, "I asked him to buy the crew so we didn't have to search for people to work the stalls and farms. He said we will do it only if I marry him."

Lexa's hand turns into a fist. I open her hand again she see her nails dug into her skin, leaving a little dent. She really needs to cut them, I know long nails annoy her. I know a lot of little fakes about her that no one else knows.

"I said yes because I couldn't deal with losing you." I say and turn my head to look at Lexa. She is looking away from me. The light from the lamp reflects on her eyes and I can see tears threatening to spill out, "I did it because I love you too." I whisper and she looks at me.

"You... love me?" Lexa asks and I nod. She smiles and looks away again.

"Look at me." I say and she slowly turns to look at me again, "He is going to want to hurt you. He is going to want to beat you because I love you." I say and she nods.

"There is nothing he can do to me that hasn't already been done." She says and my heart breaks. I don't want anything bad to happen to her... ever.

"You know this is going to be hard. Sneaking around... being in love while I get married." I explain to Lexa and she nods. I can see the gears in her head turning and I don't know what she is plotting, "Don't do anything stupid."

Lexa chuckles a little, "Whats more stupid than falling in love with a woman who is getting married to a man." Lexa shakes her head and I stop her by kissing her. I feel her lips melt into the kiss and I can feel her emotions.

Some are happy and relieved but she is mainly hurting. She is hurt because I am marrying Bellamy. I don't know how to show her that I don't want to marry him. I want to marry her.

I pull away from the kiss but Lexa follows my lips. I give in and kiss her again. The kiss gets deep but we hear footsteps. Both of us quickly pull away from each other.

Lexa stands up then helps me up. I hide behind the tree and Lexa stands with her lamp, looking into the forest. The footsteps get closer and my heart beats faster.

"Hey, Lex." I let out the breath I was holding when I hear that voice. I come out from behind the tree to see Luna and Raven looking at us, "And Clarke." Luna smirks.

"You scared us." I say and go to stand by Lexa.

"Maybe next time you shouldn't be making out in the middle of the woods." Raven says to me and I roll my eyes.

"And what are you two planning to do out here?" I ask Raven who turns beet red, "Exactly."

"We are going to go somewhere else." Raven says and she drags Luna away from us. We can here their giggles fade as they get farther away.

"Well that happened." I laugh a little and Lexa turns to me, "So what's your job going to be here?"

"Stables." Lexa answers. I stay silent waiting for more of an answer, "Um... I am going to take care of the horses and all the other animals. I'll milk cows and um.... My big job is to um..." Lexa scratches the back of her head.

"Is to what?" I ask with a small smile, telling her it's alright.

"I'm going to have to kill everything you eat." Lexa says and I frown. She is going to have to kill an animal everyday. Lexa's kind is going to turn cold with each kill.

"I'm sorry Bellamy assigned you to that." I walk closer to her and put my hands on her chest. My fingers trace her collar bone. Lexa hands go to my waist.

"Actually... Titus assigned me to that." Lexa says and I frown at the thought of Titus being back too, "Can you promise me something?"

"Anything." I respond and Lexa nods.

"Promise me he won't change you. Promise me you'll still be the artistic and brilliant woman that I met the first day you came on the boat. You might be losing your freedom, but I don't want you to lose yourself." Lexa says and I pull her head down to kiss me.

I can't get enough of her. With every kiss we share I want another one. I don't want to let go of her whenever I am holding her strong body close to mine. I don't want to lose her, "I promise. Bellamy won't change me. He might take away my freedom but I was never truly free until I met you."

Lexa smiles and kisses me one more time, "I should probably get you back to your room. We both have a big day tomorrow."

"What do you mean?" I ask her as we let go of each other and she picks up the lamp.

"I mean we have to act like we don't notice each other." Lexa responds and I nod. That is going to be hard. I am drawn to look at her. Her jaw and eyes. Her smile, which you don't get to see often, and her muscular body. She is just gorgeous.

"That's going to be difficult." I say and she nods with me. We make it out of the forest and Lexa blows out the lamp. She helps me up the tree and then onto the roof.

Lexa keeps me steady as she walks me back to my room. I climb in with her help, "Thanks for understanding." I whisper to her. I don't want anyone else to hear.

"I understand but I don't agree. Klark you know I am not going to stand for this... he won't be marrying you." Lexa says and I kiss her one more time.

"Yes he is." I say and close the window. Lexa gives me one last glance before she walks away. I sigh and lay down on my bed. All of this feels like a dream. This whole thing doesn't feel real. Since the first time I stepped on that boat nothing has felt real.

Nothing but Lexa.