Let's Hurt Tonight

50

Bro I spent all day writing this chapter and then deleted the whole thing to write this lol I hate spending hours on a chapter and then hating how it comes out

...

Amelia

It's later in the day when I find myself out with Gemma in the middle of London. Anne had taken us out to get our nails done and then we went for a bite to eat afterwards. As we were leaving the restaurant, she got an urgent phone call and told Gemma to take me around the city as my 'tour guide'. I don't doubt that she had an important phone call, but I have my suspicions it was a ploy to get Gemma and I alone together. I don't particularly mind, however. I've found myself enjoying her company as the day progresses. 

"I'm glad it's a nice day out at least," Gemma says. The two of us walk through town, passing various shops and cafes. It's cute here. Busy, but very different from New York. I find the people to be more pleasant and the architecture of the buildings are less intimidating, and more beautiful. "It's been nasty the past couple of days." 

"Today's like the ideal weather. Cool enough for a jacket but not humid or overly hot," I comment, just trying to make conversation. 

"Exactly. A lot of my friends love the summer, and I do too don't get me wrong, but I've never been a fan of extreme heat." 

"Neither have I. Especially in New York City. I don't know how it is in London but we never get a breeze in the city because of all the buildings, so when it's hot, it's hot," 

Gemma laughs. 

"Oh I believe it. I've been a couple of times in the dead of July and it was torture," she says. "It's not awful here. I think we're a little more spread out than New York, plus we don't have nearly as many skyscrapers and tall buildings." 

"Maybe not but it's beautiful here. I would move here in a heartbeat." 

"You should," Gemma says seriously, catching me off guard. 

My thoughts jumble at the thought of moving to London. I wasn't necessarily thinking when I said that. It's just something people say. I don't know if I could commit to living in London because my entire life is in America. 

"I don't know...I mean my life is back in New York," I tell her. "Starting over somewhere else scares me. I'd have to leave my friends and family behind. Plus I don't know what I'm doing work wise so I wouldn't know what to do if I lived here..."

"I get it," Gemma says. "Did you want to stay in New York permanently?"

I hesitate before answering. I hadn't really given it much thought. I can barely figure out what I want to do next year let alone where I want to live the rest of my life. 

"I'm not sure. I'm comfortable there right now and my family is there, but I don't know where I see myself," I tell her. I sigh, feeling my mind begin to wander. "Is it bad I also want to be where Harry is, though?" 

Gemma grins as the two of us cross the street, walking towards the river that runs in the middle of the city. She gestures to a bench looking out on the water, and the two of us sit down. 

"It's not bad," Gemma continues our conversation. "It means you're thinking of him too, which is important in a relationship."