Ushijima x reader (Revisions Discontinued)

•ᴠɪɪɪ

It was the next day and you were feeling quite down today. As expected, you were not at your best performance during practice. The feeling of guilt filled you up ever since you witnessed yesterday's match. You couldn't help but feel bad for yourself, and feel bad for for what you've done to Oikawa.

"F/n-chan, the score." You flinched when Coach Saito spoke all of a sudden. You weren't paying attention to the practice match at all, but you still quickly changed the score board.

Ten minutes had passed and the team is now on a water break. You hand the water bottles to each members. On a normal day, you'd be pretty pumped up and be energetic, but now, your energy seemed like it flat lined. You were devoid of enthusiasm and both Tendou and Ushijima quickly noticed that.

"F/n-chaaann, you seem down today. What's up?" the red head asked, he put his arm around you and attempts to cheer you up. You notice Ushijima looking away and you suddenly realized. You lowered your head down, trying to remember the day Ushijima looked as if he was hiding something.

"Hm?" Tendo looked at you and notices the change in your expression. He quickly removed his arm upon realizing.

"Wakatoshi... you knew all along?" After what you felt yesterday, it was no surprise that you'd feel negative. Realizing that Ushijima, the straightforward and honest guy , lied to you about something so significant made you feel a lot worse.

Ushijima's eyes turned towards your direction. "There was nothing I can do about the situation. It's not my fault you still haven't moved on from him f/n," he replied.

"Tendou let's practice your tosses." Avoiding your question, Ushijima walked away. Your eyes followed him as he went along his marry way without providing much of an answer.

Ushijima isn't the type of person to completely disregard something so significant to you. You started to feel angry that your face heated up and your blood boiled at his response.

"Wakatoshi! Don't ignore me in this situation! you—" For the first time in two years, the manager, finally lost her cool in front of the team. Tendou quickly stopped you from going berserk and causing havoc as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders.

"N-now, now,  F/n-chan. Let's calm down okay, and I'm sure Wakatoshi-kun has his reasons." You quickly realized the situation and began to calm down. Looking around, you see the worried look of the coaches and the team's faces. The red head lets you go with a warning. You let out a calmed sigh and closed your eyes.

Tendou sighed and looks at you in the eye. His serious expression caught your attention. " It doesn't make sense, f/n-chan. I get that you're mad because Wakatoshi-kun said that and kept it as a secret... but why exactly are you so mad about it?"

The question made you think. Why did it matter anyways? Why are you so mad about it? Why would you care this much about a junior high relationship? These questions ran around your head. And soon, you realized you don't even know the answers to those questions.

Tendou noticed your confused expression and places a hand over your head. "It's time you clear your head, F/n-chan. Stop and think. And stop bottling your feelings, they might explode any time." Tendou nodded and let out sigh before leaving.

'Stop bottling my feelings.' You thought about Tendou's advice throughout the practice game.

You realized that you were indeed bottling up your feelings, completely disregarding how you feel to make other people happy. You started questioning about your own happiness. You recalled the times you faked your optimism but deep inside you were truly suffering. How many times have you held back from telling Ushijima your feelings? How many times have you told Oikawa to 'Do his best' when he's out practicing with his best friend— even when you wanted him to spend more time with you? You were the best lier out there— even fooling yourself, that's how good you were. One thing was clear, you were sick of prioritizing other people's happiness over yours.

' I want to prioritize mine' you whispered to yourself. As the practice ends you went home feeling feeling woke, and as if you had finally opened your eyes. It was like a piece in you had just been completed.

You went inside your room and took a deep breath. You quickly opened the hidden drawer where you keep important things inside.

With your cold hands, you took out a pile of news papers and magazines about Ushijima. The same magazines you look at to keep yourself in check whenever you felt like confessing.

"Powerful opposite of Shiratorizawa, Ushijima Wakatoshi. New captain, Ushijima Wakatoshi, takes the lead," you read the magazine titles out loud.

"What's so good about confessing my love for you with these magazines when I could just say it to your face? Urgh! Your cool expressions on these photos just pisses me off, damn it!" You stared at the Ushijima in the magazines. It was time to let it go. Finally gaining the courage, you stood up to throw the magazines in the garbage bin. Rubbing your hands together, you sat back down to look at remaining things in the drawer and realized that you still had that photo.

A photo of you and Oikawa, happily eating ice cream together. You gathered up the courage to stare at it.

"This was when we went out for the first time— probably the only time we went out together." You chuckled bitterly at the realization.

"Well, in the garbage bin it goes."

You stood up with the photo in your hand  and walked toward the bin. " I wanted us to spend more time together. Shittykawa, the ice cream wasn't even that good in the first place." You took a deep breath. The flimsy photo glid itself through the air and into the bin where it held the magazines.

"Actually, the ice cream was pretty good." You rolled your eyes and laughed at yourself.

You finally felt free. And you realized that you were the one holding yourself back all along. Letting go of your past self felt amazing.  You were no longer that junior high school student anymore, thanks to your friends. You basked in the feeling of glory until you get a notification.

From: Super Volleyball Idiot

F/n, I apologize for being inconsiderate earlier. It wasn't my intention to mock you like that. Pls forgive me 人(_ _*)

Your heart fluttered for a second as your face starts to blush. Trying to hold back your smile, you immediately sent a reply.

To: Super Volleyball idiot

Hope you choke on a takoyaki Wakatoshi. I got super mad at you y'know? You damn idiot, your stoic expression pisses me off all the time, when you're insulting me at least say it with an expression. I forgive you, in the end I'll always forgive you and thats what pisses me off ~(>_<~)

You launched yourself unto the comfort of your bed as you continued to stare at your phone.

From: Super Volleyball Idiot

Your insults are always descriptive, and interesting, F/n. I'll make it up to you tomorrow by winning tomorrow's game (>_<)

You laughed at Ushijima's use of kaomojis.

"What a weirdo." You chuckled and smiled.

To: Super Volleyball Idiot

I cant imagine you using emoticons Wakatoshi, it's kind of creepy and weird.

From: Super Volleybal Idiot

(* ^ ω ^) (￢‿￢ )(￣▽￣*)ゞ they're pretty cute to look at. I'll have to keep using them (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)