Earth's pull seems to hold us down but my wings don't give up that easy. I can fly endlessly to reach my dreams and my main one involves you being with me. I know it's difficult and I wish things were different but even when the gravity seems to some days get stronger and hold me down, I still get up at the urge of seeing you again. Seeing your face, eyes, and that beautiful smile. When my ears are full of sounds and things trapped in my mind your exquisite laugh barrows through to clear my mind from time to time making my thoughts finally traverse through the back of my mind where they have been stuck pulling up all the memories I still have of you, of us.
I still love you endlessly, and at times I know I don't show it as strong as I could but it's cause I didn't want to make things awkward with you going for someone else. Even though I know that I could find someone else in this world, I want what's best and best isn't the money you make or what you wear it's all about happiness and who's willing to give their time and effort in the same as you, and knowing you I feel like you wouldn't do any less than that. I hope one day, soon hopefully, I get back on track and get myself to become more of the man you need and I pray that you see this and know I'd try my hardest each and everyday to make you happy and proud and become everything you wanted to be. I still dream about the day where we can find our own little wood lodge or house and live happily and be in a happy household where we wouldn't have to worry about the abuse or pain no more, just the damn electric bill from all the music you play on the tv or shows that we watch while we comfortably sit knowing we've found peace. My mindset is focused on improvement and the thought of seeing you more than the last.
I want to grind with you, deal with all the problems with you, I don't care if some days you don't feel like yourself I know I can be there and comfort and ease you down to a comfort where your worries disappear. I pray one day we can show our parents what real love should look like. I love you so much, and the countless tears I streamed at my own mistakes will never make up for what I hope to accomplish with you one day. I know I lost some trust at one point and you may seem like I don't think I care but deep down I cared more about you than anyone I know, including myself. I hope I become everything you want me to be....
