Addicted Book 3: Life And Death[COMPLETED]

Chapter 21: "Let Me Help You"

~Symphony~
°A Week Later°

~7:24pm~

I laid in bed, music playing louder than normal on my stereo. It was the evening time and my entire house was dim. Kalani was spending the week at Kiara's and seeing Kyjuan.
I had to admit, my house and I reeked of marijuana and alcohol. I was drunk right now, come to think about it. I hadn't seen daylight in almost a week now, the house was a mess, and I wore nothing but a robe thus far with a decline in eating becoming the cherry on top. Oh, I forgot to mention me lying and calling in sick every day since the incident happened.
How the hell could this happen...? We had been closer than the fingers on your hand for basically all of our lives and he just... treats me like some random girl? Was I doing something wrong? Did I lose my luster? Was I not alluring or doing my job the right way anymore? Regardless, I wasn't enough... again. Like always. With everyone.
I stumbled out of bed and rolled a blunt, smoking it immediately after it was rolled to numb any oncoming pain. I turned the stereo off and turned the television in the bedroom on to SpongeBob and laid flat on my back across my bed and smiled, shortly after I began chuckling. The feeling of euphoria coursed through my veins with the alcohol and marijuana tag freaking my system. My alcohol of choice was Balkan 176 Vodka, one of the strongest alcoholic drinks I've ever tried that contained 88% alcohol.
My head spun, and I quickly put my blunt into the ashtray and ran for the bathroom, throwing up heavily. I didn't care though. Less weight. I went back into my bedroom and smoked. The pictures on the wall caught my eye. The pictures of us on dates that were framed, us in highschool, things like that. I looked at them and smiled, running my hands down them. I quickly came back to the realization that I lived in. He's just like the rest, get over yourself he betrayed you. I screamed and smashed the photos onto the floor, shattering the glass in the frames. I took the photos out of what was left and ripped them to pieces, leaving them scattered. I chuckled and took a long drag.
I felt an enormous heave in my chest, causing me to gasp for air and cry. I collapsed to the floor beside the bed, knees pulled to my chest as I repeatedly took drags one after the other. I cried harder.
You're never gonna be worth anything to anyone. See where trusting someone gets you, you idiot?! Get the fuck up.
I lifted my head and wiped my tears. I felt my swollen eyes as I wiped. I took a deep breath, stood up, and began to walk around the house. At all of the torn down furniture, holes that had been punched in the wall, broken pictures, disarrayed items that had been thrown around from the continuous mental torture that just about completely enveloped me. I then went back into the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror. The dried tears on my face. My frizzy and tangled up hair. The loss in weight. The bloodshot eyes and the rest of the evidence of a broken heart.
What are you doing, look at yourself. Why do you constantly let other people ruin your life? You're acting so weak! Where's the other Symphony at? Nobody cares about this snivelling crying nonsense. I looked around again at the house, taking more drags. Symphony... get it together. Bring the bitch back. I sat on the couch, staring around in the dim living room.
"Fuck it." I mumbled. Fuck everything. But most of all, fuck Kyjuan. I wasn't losing myself over anyone.
I got up, still smoking, and began to get everything back where they needed to go. I opened the windows in every room, letting out this stuffy and smelly air that sat in here for almost a week. The fresh breeze felt relaxing against my skin.
I began to pick up all of the broken glass and messed up items and throwing them all away. I then put everything that was thrown from something back where they belonged. I moved photos of the children over the holes in the walls. I cleaned up every room and I swept, mopped and vacuumed afterward and sprayed air freshener throughout the house. My spirits lifted a bit after the place looked better and not so depressing. I shut the windows, blinds and curtains around the house.
I began to look through the internet on my phone while sitting on the couch, finishing up what I was smoking. Maybe going out for a change will do the trick? I found a club in the next city over that had great reviews and from the looks of things, looked really popular. Clubs hadn't really been my thing, but what have I got to lose?
I made myself eat a decent amount of food before I proceeded to pampering myself for the night out. I took a long and hot shower, washing, conditioning and detangling my hair in the process. I shaved my body completely smooth aside from anything on my head and face of course, and absorbed the warm beads of water being shot onto my skin.
I got out and brushed my teeth. Then proceeded to blow-dry and straighten my hair. Afterward I lathered up and put on a fresh layer of even makeup. I got dressed last, putting on a very revealing long sleeved white and light grey striped crop top that covered only my arms and breasts, grey jeans that did wonders for showing off my hips, ass and thighs, and a pair of rhinestone incrusted silver sandals. I admired myself in a nearby mirror, taking in my toned stomach and hourglass type figure. I applied a coat of lip gloss and combed my fingers through my hair. I sprayed a bit of perfume on and went into the bedroom.