Hope Out the Window

Mocked

"Okay, they sent me their orders." Debby set her phone down once we started down the road.

"Good, good."

"How are you, Tyler? Like really?"

"I'm good. I think."

"You think?"

"I don't know. Maybe?"

"Talk to me. What's going on?"

"Nothing in particular." I tried to be nonchalant about my answer, but Debby knew something was up already, and didn't break the silence until I was honest, "Fine. I don't know everything just feels weird. I'm sad for no reason, or I stay up all night for no reason, or I'm anxious for no reason. It's not that I have anything to be upset over, I just am. Everything feels weird. I feel like I don't even know who I am anymore. I feel like I have to be sad, I have to be anxious, I have to have some sort of problem because that's how I've been for the past ten years. I feel like I have to be fucked up because that's how I always was. I don't know how to be normal now that everything is okay. I don't know who I am." As soon as I opened my mouth the words didn't stop, barley leaving pauses to breath. "Over half my life I've been depressed, and anxious, and schizophrenic, and just insane, and now that I've got my shit together, I don't know how to act." I exhaled.

"Feel better?" Debby smirked when I finished my rant.

"Much." I smiled a little.

"Good. I know it's hard dude. You have to pretty much find yourself all over again. I know that when you get in a bad mental health cycle you forget who you are and what you like and stuff like that, but I'm here for you, Jenna and Josh are here for you, and we will help you rediscover yourself."

"Thank you."

"Anytime."

We drove down the cloudy, rainy streets of Columbus until we got to a white building called "First Watch".

"Shall we." I smiled at Debby as the rain picked up.

"We shall." She laughed. I got out ran to her side of the vehicle, opening the door for hers "Thanks." She laughed as we ran through the rain.

"Hi," The women chuckled at our giggling, "what can I do for you two?"

"We have a pick up order for "Joerydun"." Debby turned to me, "I mushed all of our last names together." I shook my head and laughed.

"Alright, I'll get that for you guys." The lady left from behind the desk but soon returned with drinks and two bags of food. We payed, grabbed our stuff, then rain back into the rain.

"This smells so good." Debby groaned on our way home.

"It really does smell amazing." I took a turn on the slick road.

"Right?" She agreed.

Just as I took the next curve a truck was swerving to the our side of the road. I glanced behind us as quick as possible and saw no one there, "Hold on." I quickly pumped the breaks and jerked the wheel so we would turn into the grass beside the road. I honked at the truck as it passed us, which made whoever driving realize that they were on the wrong side of the road and they moved back over.

"Are you okay?" I unhooked my seat belt and turned to face her.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." She seemed a little shaken up, but snapped out of it, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, fine." We both took a couple deep breaths before I pulled back onto the road and finished getting us home. "Are you sure you're okay?" I asked my shaking friend before we got out of the car.