Winter [Completed]

TWENTY FIVE

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December 27th
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"You don't have to accept the things you are not okay with."

—unknown

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Kelly POV

It's been two days since Imani and I had our heart to heart. Two days since Jordan and I...Two days. 48 hours. 2,880 minutes, and already so much has changed.

I've done a lot of thinking over these past few days, and I've realized that I'm tired. I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted, and being angry or bitter just isn't worth my effort. What Imani and Ethan did to me was bad. They lied to me, and I'm still a little hurt by that, but if I've learned anything from this experience, it's that life is too short to hold onto anger. Even though they deceived me, I don't want to be mad at them. To preserve my welfare, I must move on and forgive.

"Hey, Kelly." Ethan sits down beside me on the couch.

Ethan has been acting strange ever since Christmas, and I know Imani told him about our talk. We've spoken from time to time, but we never really addressed the issue, and I feel like he's been walking on eggshells around me more than usual.

"Hey," I say, glancing at him briefly as I turn the TV channel.

The couch dips as Ethan shifts awkwardly beside me. "So, um, how've you been feeling lately?"

Sighing, I pause the TV and turn to him. "Ethan, I'm not mad at you, if that's what you're wondering."

Ethan furrows his brow as he runs a hand through his hair. "Oh...okay."

I'm about to press play again when he speaks.

"Kelly, I um, I want you to know that I really am sorry for lying to you...and for what happened before." He glances at a spot over my head, unable to meet my eyes.

I shut my eyes before glancing away from him as well. "Ethan, you don't have to do this—"

"Yes, Kelly, I do. I need you to know how bad I feel—"

"Okay, I get it. You told me, alright? Are we done?"

I don't need this.

"Kelly..."

I cross my arms over my chest and lean back into the couch as I blink back frustrated tears. "What?"

"I'm sorry."

"Okay!" I snap. "Ethan, what do you want me to say? That I forgive you? That it's okay? Because I can't..." I wipe away the stubborn tears that cling to my cheeks. "I can't just tell you what you want to hear, okay. You don't just get to apologize and be absolved from your guilt...it doesn't work like that."

I grab the remote and press play, ignoring Ethan's stare burning into the side of my face.

I thought I was okay...that I could move on, but I guess I was hurt deeper than I was willing to acknowledge. I want to be done with this. To move on and focus on my healing. But, it's clear that Ethan and Imani still have a hold on me.

"Thank you," Ethan says after a moment of silence, and I frown, confused.

Turning to him, I squint my eyes in suspicion. "For what?"

"For your candor. I know this is a hard time for you—"

"No. You can't begin to imagine the emotional turmoil you two have put me through. All the nights I cried myself to sleep. The days where I felt trapped inside my own mind with questions and worries and doubts. The pain in realising that two people you cared deeply for were lying to your face for months..." I shut my eyes, biting my bottom lip when I feel the tears coming again. "Please...don't act like you understand. I don't need your empathy."