Superimposed

3 & 4

"But you've done it all the time I've known you, which was before exam season started" Jefferson persists, her eyes are kind and her words are spoken with good intentions. But they just hit into Taron like bullets to his chest.

"I'm fine"
Tarons voice was colder and emotionless, he wasn't conveying anyone. He just wanted Ms Jefferson to drop it now.
"I won't force you to open up to me, but if you ever want to talk about it my door is always open. You're a kind student who has great potential and if you're struggling it's okay to ask for help"
Ms Jefferson looks at Taron carefully, but with a bit of pride - almost like a mother looks at her son.
"I'm seeing a therapist" Taron confesses, "Well mum wanted me to see a therapist so I go to make her happy"
"It doesn't help you?" Jefferson walks over to her desk at the front of the studio and sits down.
"Hard to tell" he shrugs and Ms just smiles sympathetically.

"Okay class, break over!" Jefferson shouts, giving Taron a knowing nod to which he walks back to the back of the class.

CHAPTER 4

Taron still didn't know what to make of the conversation he had with Ms Jefferson, he kept playing it over in his head all week.

He didn't know whether to actually speak to her about some of the things on his mind, or whether to deal with it on his own - as he always did.
But maybe Ms Jefferson could be someone who he could talk to, someone who he could at least be himself around. Everything she had told him came across with care and good intentions; a trustworthy character she seems. But what would he say to her? How would he start a conversation like that? This is when a script would be of great help.

After some more thought, Taron decided that he did want to speak to Ms Jefferson and thought that Friday would be the best day. Simply because it was the day that his mum and Phil weren't expecting him back till late because he usually hangs around the block with his 'friends'.

"Miss Jefferson?" Taron peered into the room from the slightly opened door. His voice was quiet, almost scared.
"Taron! Do come in!" Jefferson stood from her desk and welcomed Taron into her classroom with a big smile, "What brings you here?"
That question seemed a little pointless to Taron because their conversation was fresh in his mind, yet it did happen a week ago. Ms Jefferson probably doesn't even remember offering time to talk. Maybe this was a bad idea.

"Um- I came to ask about the play" Taron lied, nerves getting the better of him. Yet Jefferson saw through it, she knew why he was here - she didn't need to ask the question, she just didn't know how else to start the conversation.
"Taron, I'm so proud that you came"
Her response didn't correlate to Taron's, yet it made perfect sense.
"I um-" Taron stumbled on his words and adjusted his cap nervously, "You're the first person to properly ask if I'm okay and I thought that maybe I could talk to you - properly" He quickly added smiling slightly as his confidence was regained. But this was his own confidence, not from putting on an act.
"I want to get help, but I don't know the right way to go about it. The therapist thing is stupid - I'm not myself with him because I can't properly tell him everything because I, um-" He trailed off, looking up to meet Jefferson's eyes since his had momentarily drifted to the floor.
Jefferson looked fully invested, like she was really interested in what Taron had to say so when he hesitated she nodded as a reassurance. As a way of saying that was listening and she did care.
"Because Phil threatened me, sayin' that if I did tell my therapist about the shit he does then- then he'd kill me" The last two words were almost a whisper, as if Taron was ashamed of being the victim. But the truth was, he always was the victim he just played as the villain - strong and courageous, feared and aggressive. But he was none of that, he was an 18 year old boy who was struggling, he just never let himself admit it.
"Phil?" Jefferson asked, cutting Taron's train of thoughts
"My step dad"
"Oh, I thought he was-"
"My real dad? Yeah everyone does, my real dad left a long time ago. I have no idea where he is" Taron picked at the skin around his nails, trying to focus on anything but the fact that he'd just told someone all of this. Actually spoken the words and it felt good.
"Sit" Jefferson instructed to which Taron nodded and took the seat opposite her desk, "Take the hat off"
Taron gave her a confused look, but proceeded to do as he was asked. Ruffling his hair a little and running his hand through it in an attempt to fix it up.
"Now I actually feel like I'm talking to Taron Egerton"
Taron smirked a little, almost welling up at how much Jefferson already knew.
"How long have you known?" He asks her as she too sits down at her desk, facing Taron

Ms Jefferson didn't have to do much talking after that, Taron just talked and talked, saying everything he'd never said before. It was the form of therapy he never knew he truly needed until now. Jefferson was content in listening, in just being the ear that Taron hadn't had from anyone before.

It's not like he could talk to his mum about half of the stuff he told Jefferson because in a horrible way she was part of it. Part of this ordeal that Taron went through every day of his life.

Taron had been talking for about an hour when Jefferson came to the conclusion, "So this is why you are like this?"
"It's not by choice, I don't like all this" Taron looked down at his outfit, fiddling with his cap in his hands, "Being like this just helps me"
Jefferson nods sadly, she was finally getting an insight into the student that she'd wanted to understand for so long.

But there was one part that Taron never told Jefferson, not to its full extent; which was Phil and how bad things were at home. It wasn't that he didn't want to, it was more that he was scared of what might happen if he did.

He did tell her how much he loved his mum and how much he wanted the best for her. Really singing her praises and telling Jefferson all about how he wanted to leave this town and get into drama school; living with just his mum.
So although Taron never voiced it, Jefferson got the idea that Phil didn't mean much to him - the way he corrected her at the beginning about him being a stepdad spoke volume in itself.

"Do you see your real dad Taron?" Jefferson looked intently at him, reading his body language and every change of expression in his face.
"No"
"Do you want to?"
"It's been so long, I don't think he wants anything to do with me. Probably doesn't know who I am"
There was a sting of pain in Taron's voice as he said those words, he stared down at his shoes and avoided eye contact with Jefferson. The truth was he wanted to meet his dad more than anything, but he left when he was so young. He wants to have a proper father figure in his life, he wants his mum back - the way she was before Phil. A strong woman who looked after Taron and who didn't compromise for anyone, now all she does is compromise. So does he.

Ms Jefferson noted that Taron cleverly avoided answering the question and was surprised at how strong Taron was at telling her all of this, once he was into it he didn't hesitate. He never teared up and his voice was overall a strong one, he was sure about what he'd been through and how it made him feel. He knew that he has a coping mechanism and he embraced it, knowing it was helping him.
Jefferson felt immensely proud of him, a student who was excelling in what he was doing at school and yet went through so much outside of it.