Soundtrack of my Summer

4. Strength and Dignity

I didn't know what to say to that so I just started working on removing the stain. But no matter how hard I rubbed the damn thing, it wouldn't come off.

'You need a girl's touch. Here,' she smiled and walked over to me, taking the cloth out of my hand. She worked at it patiently while I just watched. We were centimetres apart and I could feel my skin burning from our close proximity.

I wanted to pull her close, run my fingers through her hair, brush her soft cheeks with my thumb. I mentally shook my head. This wasn't right. I had to stop thinking like that or I'd go crazy and do something that I really shouldn't.

'So what's with the best friend?' she asked, snapping me out of my reverie. She looked at me with a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

'You mean the slightly psychotic, over-confident flirt who thinks he's God's gift to earth?' I grinned back at her.

She laughed. 'Yeah, him.'

'He's okay. I mean yeah, he's an ass but it's part of the package. Oh and you have to get used to his annoying personality and weird sense of humour. But once you know when to tune out to him, it kind of becomes an automatic response.'

She laughed again. God, she had an amazing laugh. This girl was captivating me and she didn't even know it.

'He knows about us.' It wasn't a question; it was a statement and it caught me by surprise. It was a turn I hadn't been expecting.

'Yeah.' I shrugged. 'But that comes with the territory of being a best friend right?'

I looked at her and she didn't say anything; instead she silently handed me back the now pure-white top, her eyes downcast and shadowed with a curtain of pain. And that's when it hit me. She hadn't told anyone, hadn't turned to anyone. She had been suffering in silence. I felt my heart plummet into a pit of darkness. Guilt and shame surged over me. I had put her through so much and I could never take any of it back.

'Thanks,' I muttered, taking my top from her. As I was putting my shirts back on, I noticed that she was watching me with an almost wistful expression.

'You've changed,' she said quietly, her tone echoing sadness.

'Someone's in a perceptive mood today,' I said hesitantly. I had no idea where this was going. 'In what way?' I asked cautiously.

'I don't know, you just have.'

'Is that a compliment or an insult?'

'I haven't figured it out yet,' she admitted.

I gazed at her and her eyes searched mine for something. Strength. Hope. Could I give that back to her?

'You're wrong you know,' I told her. Her eyes were swept with confusion. 'About being another girl on the heap,' I clarified.

A hard flint clouded her eyes, a mixture of defiance, bitterness and anguish.

'Drake, I said-'

'Are you not going to hear me out or listen to what I have to say?' I asked, desperation tainting my voice. If she could give me a chance, just one chance...

Her expression altered at my tone and she softened.

'If you can give me five reasons why I should listen to you, then maybe I'll consider it.'

'Even if I can give you those five reasons, it's still not a guarantee?'

She gave me an even look.

'No. Just like you weren't my guarantee.'

She had me there. How did she do that? She had a way with words that hit me with a sharp jab every time, bringing to the surface memories that I wasn't proud of. I was going to get her to listen to me. I had to.