CAN DIVIT CHRONICLES

If You Love Me Don't Let Go (2)

Thank you all very much for your patience, all the votes, and comments. I hope you like what I've done here...this isn't the fairytale love story we're used to, not yet. Stay with me?

"Sanem! Wait! Don't leave like this," Can shouted as he trailed behind Sanem. Instinctively, he reached out to grab her arm as she darted past him and out the door of his hotel room.

Then abruptly turning to face him, she belted out, her voice pained and shaky, "tell me you didn't have sex with that demon! Tell me you didn't throw away any chance we had left at a future together!" Sanem shook her head and looked at him, not an ounce of forgiveness in her eyes. "Can, let go. Let go, don't touch me. Don't you dare touch me again." Her body was shaking and her nose was running as tears fled down her cheeks.

Can could see the utter devastation in her eyes and knew he was losing the love of his life!

"Look what you did, Can! You killed us...you could never be my Albatross!"

The childlike sounds she made as she wailed made something sink deep inside of him. He gave her an earnest look, onyx eyes unmasked and filled with tears. "No, Sanem..don't say that. Don't say that. This isn't what you think, I swear!" Aware of his strength and propensity for aggressiveness, Can stopped mid-stride and restrained the urge to pick Sanem up and dragging her back inside the room. What made him hesitate is when he saw fire in her eyes and he removed his hold on her, reluctantly. Then almost instinctively, he attempted to reach out yet again in an effort to wipe the tears streaming down her face despite the warning. Can tried to touch her cheek but her head jerked away from him. Her mouth trembled as she looked into his inky gaze.

"It's not what I think? What is it then, Can? Is that not Polen sprawled naked on your bed like a hyena in heat? That wasn't her who just ridiculed me for being stupid enough to think you might have some semblance of respect and care for me? I'm sorry, I don't believe a word you say. I give up! I'm tired of throwing my self-respect out the window and chasing after you, Can. I'm tired of being just an inconvenient option for you. Have Polen. Have all the women you want. I'm done! I'm done with you!" She said and oddly it wasn't the words that hurt. For the most part, he was used to angry Sanem spewing angry, shallow words she didn't mean when they fought. It was the calmness in her tone this time and the coldness in her delivery. It was then he realized this time was real. He might have lost her for good.  What had he done to them, to his sweet love?!  He went to reach for her as she stood there shivering but she pulled away, arms folded tight to her chest.

All he could do was shake his head, staring down at his feet. He felt like such a hypocrite and a fraud, then finding the nerve to look her in the eyes, he tightened the grip he had on her arm and tried to bring her closer to him. "Sanem, I....I can't tell you those things. I'm so sorry...She means nothing to me, you're everything to me. Everything. Allah, help .us, I beg," he said, turning his face away from her, ashamed and sobbing. Wiping his face with the sleeve of his shirt, he forced himself to face her again. "I swear it. I'm sorry I've hurt you, Sanem. Please for--"

"That's right, Can...you talk to Allah because I don't want to hear your lies," she said sharply, hurtful eyes staring straight through his own.

Noticing some of the other guests that had started to gather outside of their rooms, Can tried to lower his voice, modulating his tone.   He frowned when he saw how swollen and red her eyes were. "Sanem, I love you more than anything in this life..."

"You don't know what love is," she said cutting him off, the hurt he had caused written all over her expression. "So let me get this right... Suddenly your love for me means so much to you? You didn't get to manipulate me that way, Can. You did exactly what you wanted to do, and with HER!" She cried out, wiping her nose and her face with her palm. She had broken down in a way he had never seen before. He had broken his Sanem and would never forgive himself for this pain he had caused. The crazy thing was when it was all said and done, none of the other stuff mattered, he had forgiven her the night they had broken up in his head, his heart just hadn't caught up yet. He thought if he could just hold her, hold her tight in his arms they could somehow talk their way through this.  Just when he reached for her again to pull her into his arms, Polen suddenly appeared in the doorway, wearing nothing but one of his t-shirts despite the fact he had been gone for hours and she should have been long gone.

"The DEVIL!" Was all Sanem said as she glared at Polen, hot and angry, her eyes watering uncontrollably as she turned and stormed off. The neighbors had spilled out into the hallway to gawk and gossip which made everything a thousand times worse. If anything going after her now would be humiliating for them both so he let her go, a decision he would soon regret. To stave off the rage he felt bubbling up in his veins, as well as keep himself from lunging at Polen's throat, he turned and punched the wall, an eery involuntary moan leaving him as he continued to lash out, punch after punch. He was so outdone that he was numb to the fact he had broken his hand. "LEAVE HERE, NOW!  I don't want to see you here when I come back," he growled, oblivious to growing crowd and he changed his mind,  charging past them all, looking for his Sanem. Trembling and breathless by the time he reached the street, Can let out a string of curses as he spotted Sanem ducking inside of a waiting taxi, quickly speeding off.