My Funny Animal Jam Stories/ Trolls

The Survey of Absolute Doom

As you probably know, I love effin' around with hackers and scammers. I'm actually quite surprised how, after almost eight years of my animal jam career, I've never been scammed or hacked before. I guess I'm careful. Or just carefully making fools of everyone.

Bare with me as I type this eating peanut butter ice cream.

This event happened about a week ago. This hacker was one I would consider a top-level hacker. Flippin' dangerous to those unaware of what they're doing. Luckily, this one was not one to taint my hacker-free career.

I was takin' a-walkin' in Jamaa Township doing literally nothing of importance besides checking out random people's dens to see if I could nab a few items from shops, when I got an alert for someone in my den. I was like, "I thought I locked that gobblam thing what the freak man" and I went there. Turned out, there were actually two people there, not one. But the icon still said I had one person in my den. Immediately, I pulled out my virtual pocket knife. There's some shonky business going on here, mate. I already suspected someone was gonna try to scam me outta something right when one of them said "hi" to me. The two people were a nonmember tiger with a new jammer username and a member eagle with a username I can't remember. Bunch of dumb gobbledegook. Who cares. Anyway, the eagle flied around randomly as the tiger asked me to search up a youtube video with an oddly specific name. I did it because I wanted to see what they had to offer for a scam. I would then put them in my mental dictionary of "scammer tactics and personas". The youtube video was a couple seconds long with text talking about how important reading the description was, so I read it. There was only a link that said something about taking a survey. It wasn't a .com link or anything, but something weird like a download. A virus. Me, wanting to see how much work this idiot would put into a scam, clicked on it. It opened a new window of my browser, where this hacker had completely recreated the Animal Jam homepage almost perfectly, but instead of a log in to your Animal Jam account, it wanted you to type in the password and username of your Gmail account. Definitely not the AJ we know and love. I quit out of the tab and deleted the downloaded content. Surprised that it actually worked. I still have no virus from it. Anyway, I told the tiger, "I'm not doin' it, pal." They probably knew at this point I wasn't gonna do it, so they called their second account of the eagle for plan B. Th eagle immediately started screaming about how they got hacked, and the tiger left. It was obvious that both accounts we being controlled by one person somewhere in the world with a neckbeard the size of Texas's capital. Anyway, The eagle then started yammering about wanting gifts and a friend, but I wasn't fooled, brotha. If they actually got scammed, they probably would have started begging right when they got to my den, not right after I told the tiger I wasn't gonna do the survey. Anyway, after trying to coax this dummy that everything was gonna be fine, I buddied them, gave them a rare item monday, gave them a jam-a-gram ordering them to shove off, locked them out, and un-buddied them. Now THAT'S how to conceal yourself and be an isolationist in this corrupted world.

Moral of the story: Don't do drugs, don't do surveys for slugs. G'night everyone.