Chapter 43

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Alex pov-

Samatha lead me down the hallway to the entrance she stayed silent the whole time not asking me anything. we reach the double doors before I could tell her goodbye she engulfed me in a hug and pulled me close to her it surprised me, "I'm sorry" she whispered sadly in my ear Samantha pulled away from me her eyes were filled and she immediately walked away from she didn't even wave or say goodbye. I was confused why did she hug and why did she apologize.. then it hit me maybe she saw my dad's true color, I give one glance at the hallway where Samantha went off to and left the hospital.

it took me a while to find my dad but I saw him sitting in the driver seat he was in a white sedan...he must had to burrow it from someone since he sold our last car for beer and money. my eyes caught a bud light in his hand he was drinking it, this car ride was going to be hell I slowed my pace... I didn't want to go home with him someone please help me I then thought of Jason I wanted him here with me now... I wanted him to take me away but he's gone now.  I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't know I was at the car, "hurry the fuck up Alexander and get in the damn car already" my dad yelled irritated because of my slow pace.

  I jumped at his loud voice but I didn't get the car right away my eyes caught a pink crumpled paper on the ground.  I reach down and pick it up I stuffed in my jeans pocket and got in the car my dad started up the sedan and backed out the hospital parking lot, it made me unease at my dad's silence he didn't even pick up his can of bud light. as we drove down the road home we stopped at a red light my dad finally spoke. "so what was it this time girls making fun of you or the bullies beating the shit out of you or was your fucking mother" he asked annoyed, I tried to answer and explain what happened that night but he snapped when he I open my mouth." No! I don't want to fucking hear it Alex you're just going make up a damn excuse if you wanted to kill yourself do it at your on time and leave me the hell out of it I'm tired of you fucking moping around the house because of your mother not around."

I flinched and cowered in my seat I didn't say anything  "I had to waste my damn time to get you from the hospital"  he mumbled as he grabbed his bud light and took a sip.  he put his drink down and continue to speak to me it made want to cry from his harsh words, my dad then glared at me when we turn down a road "don't you have a razor with you Alex aren't you going to cut to make yourself feel better" my dad teased as he chuckled he chuckled  louder when he saw my body tremble against the car window.... I wanted to get away from him but I was trapped in this car. my dad soon stopped laughing and stared at me I could see hatred bloom in his eyes, "once we get home I'm taking you to a psychiatric hospital so they can watch you for suicide" he said angrily my breathing stopped as watched the road we drove on blur. my dad would usually make his own suicide watch lock me up in my room for weeks with no food he may sometimes give me water he'll only let me out until he sees or cares if I was feeling the urge to not kill myself anymore he didn't even let me out of my room when I had to go to school. 

that was father cruel method of a suicide watch....but I wasn't feeling suicidal that night I wanted to go home but luke and his friends had to butt in and make my day FUCKING WORSE.....and now my dad taking me to a psychiatric hospital because he thought I tried to take my life that night but it was luke who was trying to... a psychiatric hospital  to me was an asylum to keep me nothing but quiet.  my dad stopped talking rest of the drive and continue to drink his beer I stayed  quiet wishing that was nothing but a dream and I would wake up with happy family again, but it  wasn't a dream nor did wake up it just felt like I was in a nightmare that I couldn't escape from it made the inside of me tear apart as I stared out the window.

we got home in 30 minutes my dad parked the sedan in front of the junkyard I stared at junkyard it was my last time I'm going see this place again before I leave to that damn asylum. my dad then ordered me to get some clothes and my things, I got out of the car went to the trailer my dad just stayed and the car waited for me to get back. I open the door to the trailer and went inside the trailer was filled with some smoke but it wasn't a fire it was Emma smoking a blunt on the sofa as she read a magazine, she then stopped reading and removed the blunt from her mouth she winked at me and blew me a kiss. I didn't show any emotion to her and quietly went to my room and locked the door behind me, I didn't get any clothes and grabbed what I needed I just went to my desk and knocked everything off the surface as it made loud thud when it hit the floor but I didn't care about that right.... I wanted to know was on the paper I place my plastic bag on my bed but the picture of Jason and my sketchbook was in the car under my seat so my dad wouldn't be curious and found my mom letter in the sketchbook or asked about the picture.

I stared at the space at my desk I took a seat...Jason scent still invaded my senses if only he was here I would feel happy again I missed him.  but I stopped thinking of Jason for a bit and take out the pink paper from my pocket, it was crinkled up and slightly torn but my curiosity got the best of me and gently uncrinkled the paper. I felt a warm feeling growing in my chest as eyes drifted to a name on the paper....it was a phone number but what made it unique that phone number belong to my Luna.












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