She lives in only the dark. [pitch black x reader]

28

Once we were all back at the pole I ran straight to my room, my hands shaking as I pulled the blanket from my bed in a quick motion and wrapped it tightly around my shoulders.

Loki eventually trotted into my room and joined me on the bed, curling into my blanket-huddled side, and immediately fell asleep, me watching over him with slight awe and love, smiling softly while shaking my head.

I head footsteps make their way in the direction of my room and I look down, carefully picking up Loki and setting him in my lap, running my fingers slowly through his fur.
He woke for a moment, but was otherwise undisturbed as he moves closer to me, and I ignore when someone walks into my room, keeping my gaze on the small orange fluff.

"Sheila..."

"You were gone... I don't understand."
I sniff slightly, hugging my pillow close to my chest.
"You can't just... you can't just  come back after.."

I shake my head, turning my head to the side so he doesn't see the tears stinging my eyes, biting my lip.

I hear him walk towards me slowly, his hind quarters thumbing quietly against the wood floors, sitting on the end of the bed while facing me, shaking and placing his paw gently over my knee, the sudden motion making me flinch slightly.

"He put me through trials and... I don't even know if this is real.. I don't know what's real anymore but either way it doesn't fucking matter because-..."
I cut myself off as I feel myself grow more angry, at myself, at the world, at Pitch and others, the thoughts of wanting to die were back but I didn't know how to distinguish them.

"Why doesn't it matter (Y/n)?"
He whispers lowly, his accent thick as his ears tilt back slightly, both in worry and defense, watching me closely as I avoid his gaze.

"It just doesn't... please, I just want to be alone."
I feel my shoulders shake slightly as I feel silent sobs run up my throat, bringing my hand up to bite my thumb, trying to stop.

"If you're alone you'll do the most damage to yourself."
Bunny slowly grabs hold of my hand, gently taking it away from my mouth and frowning deeply at the bite mark left behind, small bruises already becoming visible.

"I don't care. Just get out."
Hot tears stream down my face, not taking my hand away from his as it shakes, glaring at my duvet painfully.

"Just leave me alone, and spread the message for me."

I look over his shoulder at the sound of new footsteps, Jack slowly appearing in the doorway with a bewildered look in his eye, holding his staff tightly in his hands.
I feel the tears run faster and I growl, glaring at the both of them.
"Now!"

At that Bunny stands and takes giant steps to the door, trying to avoid the rapid flames growing from my shoulders, my body shaking more and it even wakes Loki, who runs to take shelter under the bed.

I hear the door close and I slowly uncurl my fists, panting as to keep myself together, my body being tense, and my breathing hard as I start to sob, sliding down the side of my bed, my knees held tightly to my chest and my shoulder in the wall, hiding my face in my arms.

'You're a fucking mistake and you know it! They see you as a threat! You're nothing other than a waste of time, they just want you back for your powers.'

the sobbing grows harsher as I falter, the thoughts consuming me as I shake my head, both trying to get hold of my thoughts and tears, clawing at my sides as my arms are wrapped tightly around my torso.

I spend the rest of my night like that until I pass out, my crying having slowly calmed, and my body slumping into the wall slightly, waking late in the morning with Loki at my  side, and a fluffy, warm blanket placed securely over my shoulders.
(Much to my confusion)

I look down to Loki and sigh, shaking my head at his loyalty to not leave me, a sad smile on my face as I place my fingers through his hair, scratching his side gently, being careful around his wings.
"I don't deserve you little guy... or anyone else."

'I stayed in my room the whole night, almost undisturbed, and I was going to make sure it stayed  like that during the day too.'