Voltron Oneshots

Truth

(Original Colors)

~Lance's POV~

"Hey, Lance! Could you try this food I made?" Hunk asked me. We were sitting in the kitchen, talking.
"Of corse! That's my job, isn't it?" I responded, acting happier than I actually am. Hunk smiled, handed me some food that looked like a pineapple, and watched my expression as I ate it.
"OoO! This tastes super good! Kind of like a space pineapple," I exclaimed. Before I knew it, I was talking about subjects that I would have never confessed, "Geez, I wonder how many calories that had. I'm gonna gain, like, a pound! I'm so fa-" I slapped my hand over my mouth, my eyes wide.
Saying Hunk looked shocked was an understatement. He looked astonished. Mortified.
"Well, I'm gonna go hide in my room and probably cr-" I cut myself off again. Nope, nope, nope! I don't want him to know about that!
"Bye! See ya later!" I exclaimed, panicked, while running out of the room. As I was running down the hall, I ran into Keith.
"Sorry! I'm trying to go hide in my room so that I can have a mental breakdown alone," I exclaimed with wide eyes. Why is this happening?!
"What..?" Keith responded with a confused, concerned voice.
"I'm depressed!" I yelled before I could cover my mouth. Without another word, I took off. Keith started to yell after me, telling me to wait, but I just ran faster.
He was probably about 5 feet behind me, so as soon as I entered my room, I closed the door and locked it. I let out a sigh of relief, slowly sliding down the door.
"Lance! Let me in!" Keith yelled, banging on the door.
"If I let you in you're just gonna pity me!" I exclaimed.
I heard another pair of footsteps run towards my door, followed by Hunk yelling, "Lance?"
  "Why am I saying everything that comes to my mind?" I yelled, pulling my hair.
  "I guess something was wrong with the food I gave you. I'm sorry!" Hunk responded, behind the door.
  "Just go away! I'm about to freaking loose it!" I yelled, pulling my hair, tears in my eyes. I was trying not to cry with everything I had in me.
"Then let us help you!" Keith yelled, still banging on the door.
"Stop banging on the door, dang it!" I yelled as loud as I could, "I don't like it.."
He immediately stopped, but I knew they were still there. I heard more footsteps outside my door.
"What's happening?" Shiro asked.
"I accidentally gave Lance a fruit that makes him say whatever he's thinking, and he said some.. alarming stuff! He won't let us in!" Hunk exclaimed in a shaky voice.
  "Lance? Can you let us in?" Shiro asked softly.
  "Why should I? I'm just a burden! Wouldn't you like it if I was suffering?!" I yelled, tears dripping down my face. I covered my mouth with my hand, realizing what I said.
  Outside the door was silent for a minute. Somebody else walked up, "Guys, be quiet! I'm working on finding my family!" Pidge yelled.
  "Pidge, open Lance's door," Shiro commanded in a panicked voice.
  I staggered up and stumbled to the bathroom that connects to my room. Pidge started grumbling, but my bedroom door soon opened. I locked the bathroom door right before I heard footsteps running towards it.
  "Lance let us in!" Keith yelled, banging on the door again. I covered my ears with my hands, trying to block out the noise.
  "What is going on?!" Pidge exclaimed.
  "I gave Lance some food that makes him say whatever is on his mind, and he's been saying some alarming things.." Hunk responded, his voice filled with guilt.
  Memories of my childhood started to fill my mind. My father pounding on my bedroom door, trying to find me after I hid from him. My mother screaming at him to stop. My little siblings crying as I protected them from the monster of our father.
  "Papá, lo siento.." (Papa, I'm sorry) (A/N: Sorry if that's wrong; I used google translate XD) I cried, scratching my ears. It's too loud.. Far too loud.
  I was sitting against my bath tub in the right corner, my knees tucked into my chest, my head buried knees, and I was rocking back and forth, shaking.
  "Too loud.. He's gonna be mad.. Too loud!" I cried loudly, tugging my ears. I felt blood start to drip onto my hands, but I didn't care.
  The loud banging on the door subsided, "Lance..?" Keith asked softly.
  I didn't have to answer; Pidge, somehow, opened my bathroom door from the outside. My teammates rushed to me.
  "He's gonna find me.." I said quietly, still rocking back and forth, "Not safe.. Not safe.." I repeated like a broken record.
  Somebody put a hand on my arm, "Don't touch.. I'm sorry! Don't touch me!" I screamed, moving closer to the wall.
  "Lance, you're hurting yourself!" Hunk exclaimed worriedly.
  "I don't care.." I responded quietly, "No, don't care.."
  "Lance, what're you talking about..?" Pidge asked softly, sitting criss-crossed in front of me.
  "Papá.." I responded quietly.
  "Your dad? What.. did he do?" She asked softly.
  "He hurt me.." I whispered, still rocking back and forth.
  "Why don't you like loud noises?" She asked.
  "He was a loud person."
  "Can I touch you?" She asked.
"No.."
  "How can we help you?" She asked sadly.
  "Turn off the lights.. Be quiet.. Don't touch me.." I responded slowly, looking up. I was still scratching my ears, and, at this point, I had a huge headache from it.
  I removed my hands, and looked at them. They were covered in blood. Shiro handed me two towels, so I put them over my ears. Hunk turned off the lights, and we all just sat there in silence for half an hour.
  After awhile, Shiro asked, "Lance? Can we turn the lights on now?"
  "Sure.." I responded quietly. Hunk turned back on the lights. I looked up slowly, and my teammates were all staring at me with concerned faces.
  "Let's clean up your head," Keith suggested, breaking the silence. I took the towels off my ears. Dried blood was crusted on the towel, my head, hair, and hands. I slowly got up, walked to the sink, and put one of the towels under the water. Softly, I started to clean the dried blood off my head; I would have to take a shower to get it out of my hair.
  "I'm sorry.. I was being too loud.." Keith apologized after a minute.
  "It's fine. You didn't know.." I responded softly, still cleaning the dried blood off my head.
"How long am I going to say everything that I think?" I asked quietly.
"I would assume for another hour or so," Hunk responded softly.
"Mhm.. Can you guys leave me alone?" I asked, still quiet.
"Will.. you do anything to yourself?" Shiro asked worriedly.
"Probably not. I was just going to take a nap; I'm tired."
"You have to promise us before we can leave, Lance," Keith said softly.
I sighed, "I promise.."
"You're sure?" Hunk asked after a minute.
"Hunk, I can't really lie because of the food you gave me," I retorted, folding the towels, "If I don't sleep, I'm going to shower."
"Okay.. See you later.." Pidge said softly, walking out of my room with the rest of my teammates. I let out a sigh of relief I didn't know I was holding, turned on the water to the hottest temperature, stripped my clothes, and stepped into the shower. The hot water hit my back, causing me to hiss in pain, but I eventually got used to it.
  After awhile, I stepped out of the shower. I put my boxers on, then my blue, fluffy pajama pants. Before I put on my typical long sleeved, blue shirt, I looked down on my arms. White and tan scars were littered all over my wrists, ranging from my elbows to the start of my palms. I haven't cut since we got to space, but I, honestly, desperately want to. Mamá made me promise that I wouldn't cut anymore. Since I can't cut, I usually take hot showers, trying to burn myself. Sighing, I pulled my shirt over my head. I started at my reflection in the mirror.
  "Disgusting.." I mumbled, "Fat.. Useless.. Worthless.. 7th wheel.." I let out another sigh before walking out of my bathroom. Sluggishly, I walked over to my bed, laid down under the covers, closed my eyes, and, eventually, I fell asleep.

  When I awoke, I heard the voices of my teammates at the foot of my bed.
  "He's always acting so.. happy. Carefree.." Shiro stated sadly.
  "Is he not actually happy? Is it all fake? How the heck did we not notice?!" Keith asked, his voice filled with frustration, guilt, and sadness.
  "Once at the Garrison he told me the people who act the happiest have the most problems.. Do you think he was trying to tell me something?" Hunk asked, not really looking for an answer. I, actually, remember telling him that. It was right after I had a breakdown. He was asking if I was okay, and I simply told him that and walked away..
  "Guys, he's awake. It's not easy to act like you're asleep," Pidge stated.
  I opened my eyes, sat up, and put on a fake smile, "How'd ya know?"
  "I was watching your breathing pattern. It quickened, so I assumed you woke up," She said in a matter-of-fact voice, pushing her glasses up on the bridge of her nose.
  "Ah," I nodded, getting out of bed, "How long was I asleep?"
  "2 hours? We decided to just let you sleep; you looked too peaceful," Keith admitted, chuckling.
  "So the food most likely wore off," I said to myself, "What are we gonna do?"
  "What do you mean..?" Shiro asked, cocking his head like a confused puppy.
  "Are we going to train? Do a bounding exercise?" I asked, "Because I need to know if I should change into my armor or not."
  "Uh.. I was thinking we'd just.. talk.." Shiro responded.
  "So bounding exercise!" I exclaimed, grabbing my everyday clothes, "I'm gonna go change!"
  I walked back into my bathroom and changed. Right before I walked out, I heard my teammates talking.
  "How is he acting like everything is fine..? He had a huge breakdown earlier.." Hunk asked, his voice filled with concern.
  "I don't know.." Shiro responded, his voice sad.
  Before they could continue, I walked back out. I threw them all a fake smile, "Let's go!"
  They all smiled at me sadly before beginning to walk. We awkwardly walked to the training deck, the air filled with a tense silence. When we arrived, we all sat on the floor in a circle.
  "So.. Lance.. What was that about earlier?" Keith started.
  "What do you mean?" I asked, trying to act confused.
  "You know.. The whole breakdown thing.." Keith elaborated awkwardly.
  "Ah.. What do you want to know? I'm not promising I'll answer all your questions, by the way."
  "What did you mean by, 'I wonder how many calories that had,' after you ate the food I gave you?" Hunk asked.
  "Back on Earth, before the Garrison, I had anorexia.. I guess the thoughts I had never really left; I still struggle with eating, not worrying about calories, my weight, how much exercise I get. I guess that was just one of the times I had those thoughts," I responded truthfully, moving my hands while explaining.
  "Why didn't you tell anyone?" Shiro asked, his eyebrows furrowed.
  I shrugged my shoulders, "Didn't think it was important. We're trying to save the universe; we don't need to deal with my personal problems."
  All my teammates looked pained by my response, "Lance.. Your problems are important; you don't have to hide them. We're here to help everyone in the galaxy, including each other." Shiro responded in a sad voice.
  I shrugged my shoulders again, "Do you have any other questions?"
  "You have depression?" Keith asked.
  "Mhm," I nodded my head.
  "You have other problems, don't you?" Keith asked.
  "Suicidal thoughts," I admitted, looking down.
  "Any.. actions?" Pidge asked.
  "No, not anymore!" I exclaimed, waving my hands in the air.
  "What do you mean anymore?" Pidge asked.
  "Well, I mean I take really hot showers in hopes of burning myself, but that's it! I don't cut anymore; I promised Mamá I wouldn't!" I exclaimed, still waving my hands in the air.
  Shiro hesitated before asking his next question, "Can we look.. just to make sure?"
  "Do you not trust me..?" I asked in a pained voice.
  "No! No, we do trust you! I just.. I need to make sure, Lance.." Shiro exclaimed.
  I sighed, "Fine.."
  I hesitated before rolling up my sleeves. All my scars.. They would see all my scars.. I shook my head and quickly rolled up my sleeves before I could stop myself again.
  My teammates gasped, "Lance.." Hunk said sadly.
  "Hm?" I hummed, not looking at them.
  Hunk engulfed me in a bear hug, squeezing me as tight as he could. I quickly rolled down my sleeves, and I slowly wrapped my arms around him.
  "What is it?" I asked.
  He didn't answer; he simply continued to hug me. After a minute, he let go and wiped tears, that I didn't notice, off his face.
  I sat there in silence for a minute, "Any.. more questions?" I finally asked.
  "Why were you scratching your ears?" Pidge asked, "I know I asked earlier, but I want more information.."
  "My father.." I stated quietly, looking down again, "He would always come home drunk. He was always mad. If he wasn't sleeping or watching TV on the couch, drinking beer, he was hitting Mamá or I.. He could have hurt my siblings, but I would always hide them. I tried to hide myself sometimes, but he would always hurt Mamá more if I did that. Eventually, I just let him hit me.. As long as he didn't hurt Marco, Luis, or Veronica.."
  It took Pidge a minute to respond, "So.. Why exactly don't you like loud noises..?"
  "He would always bang on the doors, yelling. He was loud. Very loud. If he couldn't find any of us, he would walk around the house, banging on each door. If he heard a squeal or cry, he would start yelling at us to come out.." My hands started to reach towards my ears just thinking of the memories, but I stopped myself. It's not loud. He can't hurt me in space. I'm fine. It's fine.
  "I'm sorry!" Keith exclaimed, "You told me to stop banging on the door, and I did but I eventually just continued! And we were yelling at you! Oh god, I'm sorry, Lance!"
  "It's fine.." I replied, looking up, and smiling at him softly.
  "Is that all your questions?" I asked.
  "Yeah.. But, Lance.. If you ever need someone to talk to, to lean on, we'll always be here for you. We're your team; your family.." Shiro told me softly.
  I looked down, smiling, "Thank you.."

Sorry I haven't been updating a lot! I can't come up with any good ideas :P
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