42. Shower Often

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To say that I was depressed after the Momoko mission would be the correct sentence to describe how I felt. On the way back to the village and even when we reported our mission to Tsunade, I was quiet. The others could tell that I was sad. Lee and Guy Sensei tried to cheer me up, but it did not work. I was in a funk. When I thought about how much I failed Momoko, my chest began to hurt from guilt. 

I failed the one person I promised not to fail. I thought as I rolled around my bed. 

The past week, I was in a down mood and nothing made me feel better. I barely ate and only felt sadness. When I thought of how Tsunade probably heard of my failure, my chest hurt more than before. Somebody had to break the news to her about how I was. My guess was either Kakashi Sensei or Guy Sensei. 

That did not matter much to me though. I was still a failure. When I looked back at my time in Konoha, I felt embarrassed and miserable. 

All I have done is make a joke out of everything. I thought that if I made a joke out of everything, nothing would hurt much. It looks like pain is something nobody can escape, even if they go to a whole different world. It was when that thought came to my mind I broke down and started bawling. 

"I have to say, I never thought I would see you cry." I heard a voice say from the window. When I looked up from my pillow, I saw Kakashi Sensei. "I thought you could use some fruit because nobody has seen you in the village this past week." 

"Thank you for the kind thought, but I am not hungry." I said and buried my face back into my pillow. 

A heavy sigh was heard from Kakashi Sensei as I could hear his footsteps come close to me. He pulled my head up from the pillow by my hair. "You should not shut everyone out like how you are doing at the moment. Everyone is going to be more worried about you."

"I don't want to face the world. I want to stay curled up under my blankets forever. Now let me be." I said and tried to pull my head down to the comfy pillow. "I can't face anybody after how bad I messed up." 

"You are not the first person to not be able to keep a promise about someone's safety." He said to me and I froze. 

Obito and Rin. I forgot. I thought in my mind and felt my stomach be upset. How can I be so selfish? How can I barely have any motivation to do anything when Kakashi Sensei has lost so much but continues to go on? 

"How did you continue to go on then?" I asked him as I sat up to look at his face. He gave me a closed eye smile as he replied to me. 

"I just kept moving forward and accepted the new people in my life. Even if Guy can be overbearing, he is a friend of mine." He then sighed as he added on, "It did take me a while to learn how to go on though. However, you have a sensei that has been through difficulties. I plan on training you how to get through life." 

"Do you think I will meet somebody just as cool as Guy Sensei? You do know how cool Guy Sensei is, right?" I asked him with a small smile on my face. 

"From what I have heard, you already have somebody like that in your life. Two actually: Rock Lee and Ryuu." Kakashi said and I grinned. "I am sure that Lee would be ecstatic to help you train or to challenge you to a battle."

I was silent for a few moments with a thankful smile on my face. "Thank you Kakashi Senpai." I said and I heard him sigh. He messed with my hair and scrunched his nose. 

"Have you not taken a shower this past week?" He asked me and I could sense the disgust in his voice. 

"In my defense, I have been in a very bad mood where a shower was just unthinkable." I explained and I could see that he was still scrunching his face. "Fine, I will take a shower. I just hope you know that you are forming me into one of society’s dolls and the man is going to put us all down. This is exactly what he wants!” I yelled and when I saw his face, I wrinkled mine. “I expect you to still be here so we can talk more. You are my life training sensei, after all." 

I saw that he rolled his one eye and he walked into my peachy living room. I gathered some clothes from some draws and marched into the bathroom. It was about a twenty minute shower. That shower consisted of a lot of soap and me inhaling my new fresh scent. 

Once I was done with the shower, I changed into some fresh clothes, and walked into the living room. Kakashi Sensei was there reading Icha Icha Paradise. As soon as he saw me, he wiggled his nose around. "You smell much better." 

"Thank you; it is how I attract my men." I said with grin on my face. "I just go up to them and they smell me. They fall for me right away." 

"It is nice to see you joking again." Kakashi Sensei said to me with a closed eye smile. 

"I figured it would be a step in the right direction." I said and the smile was still on my face. "So tell me how to get through life." 

He exhaled loudly and tried to get his thoughts together. "Do not take for granite the precious people you have in your life. You need to continue forward no matter how difficult it can be. If you do not, you will miss out on some things that could really help you. Those are some of the many things I regret in my life." 

I was quiet for a few moments as I took in all of the advice. "You know how we are trying to get Sasuke back, I see why he left. At first it all looks so black and white and people think that he just did it for power. Now I know how Sasuke feels. I just want to cause pain to the people that gave me pain, as if that will help in some way. Like those people should be punished for what they have done." 

Kakashi Sensei leaned forward and set his chin on his hands. "Mika, if you follow down the same path that Sasuke has done you will never live a happy life." He said to me in a serious tone. "I allowed one of my students to go that path, but I will not allow that to happen to another one of my students." 

"I know that and there is no way I can leave the village. Now I have too many things to do here and scores to settle. It's just that, if I am strong enough and get the chance, I want to destroy Orochimaru for everything that he has done." Determination and hatred were burning in my eyes as I held up a fist.  "This is going in his butt hole." 

He sighed at my explanation. "I cannot control everything you do. As long as you are not leaving the village like Sasuke did." His eye brow was then raised at me. "What do you plan on doing for helping retrieve Sasuke back?" 

"To be honest, I have no idea. I think I will still try to stop him so you do not go further down his path of destruction. I do understand where he is coming from, but that does not mean I approve of everything he has done." I explained to Kakashi Sensei who nodded his head. 

"I see," he said and leaned back. "As long as you are not leaving the village, there are some things that just are what they are. I think I can accept you wanting some revenge, as long as you never go to the extreme that Sasuke has." 

"Do you think Naruto would even let me? He would pull me back my teeth if he had to. I am pretty easy to spot so he would not have a difficult time trying to find me. All of you guys would pull me back by my hair." I said and smiled gently. "Thank you Kakashi Sensei. You guys have really become my family. Even if we are dysfunctional and there is some hard core incest going on, I still think of everybody like my family. Sasuke gave up more than he thought he did." 

"Naruto is not letting Sasuke give up everybody." Kakashi Sensei pointed out. 

"Neither am I." My hands were on my hips in a determined manor. 

Sasuke, I can't let you go through all of this pain alone. I will help you find happiness, even if I have to break all of your bones in the process. 

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What did you guys think of this chapter? What did you think of what Mika said about getting revenge on Orochimaru and helping bring Sasuke back? c: I apologize that it was kind of heavy, but ALL THAT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT THOUGH! LOOK AT THE BEAUTY THAT IS MIKA'S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT! I honestly adore character development in characters. c: 

The next chapter will actually be the last chapter of this book in the series. Then I begin on the next and final book in the series. c: It will be a time skip into the future just before Naruto comes back and I will recap what had happened to Mika during that time skip. 

Have a swell day and smile! ^w^ Farewell.  P.s. The video on the side is bootylicious. I thought you fellow booty lovers would want to see it. c: 

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