You Better Know (Red Velvet Irene/Reader/Twice Sana)

Chapter Twenty-Four(Alternate Ending)

“No! No!” Sana yelled as she shuffled in her sleep. “This-this can’t be--No!”

Her movements made me slip out of my own sleep rather quickly. “Sana” I spoke softly to try and not startle her.

“Wake up babe. Wake up” Sana had mentioned her nightmares but I had never actually been present during one. “Sana, its only a dream. Wake up babe” I put my hand on her shoulders and shook her gently.

Two beautiful eyes opened, full of worry but quickly scanning the room.

“What-what are you doing here?” Sana looked at me in shock.

“I’ve been here Sana. I came to visit remember” I smiled trying not to add to her already worried mind.

“You’re-you’re real?” Sana placed her hands on my cheeks, desperately tracing over my face with her fingers. “You’re right here?” she asked. “You’re here with me?” she said stopping on lips.

“I’m right here baby” I smiled again. “Another nightmare?”

She nodded timidly when she realized it was in fact another nightmare.

“I didn’t think they happened this often” I confessed to her.

And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel guilty. This had been happening ever since my surgery. It had been more than two years and with Sana and I, in different colleges, there wasn’t much that I could do. She especially didn’t like to talk about it.  During the surgery I had come close to I guess you could say, “come close to dying” And it took a clear toll on Sana, plus all the other things before that. Granted, she now had my full commitment, although, I was sure that the nightmares Sana had, had in part to do with the doubt that I wouldn’t remain faithful to her not to mention the chance that my heart could still fail at any moment.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“It’s the same one” she said just above a whisper leaning into my shoulder. “Its so real. I’m in that lobby again and I’m waiting and waiting and then my dad comes and tells me that there was nothing he could do. And gosh, I just want to—”

“Hey, hey” I interrupted her, “It’s not real. I am alive and I am here with you” I said wrapping both of my arms around her. “I’m so sorry Sana”

“Why are you apologizing? You have no control over my dreams”

“No, I don’t. But it is my fault Sana. I put you through all that shit in high school, plus my heart and these are the repercussions. Trust me, I wish I had control over your dreams. I’d fill them with rainbows and unicorns that fart cotton candy clouds and with trees made of candy and strawberries”

I heard a weak laugh coming from Sana and I took it as a small victory. “I just wish there was more I could do. Find a way to stop them or assure you that I’m all yours. I won’t let this old thing take me from you that easily”

“Just hold me. You can do that for now” And I did. I held her as close as possible against my chest and we lay there in silence thinking about all we’d been through.

Almost two years later and it still wasn’t easy for Sana and I. Somehow, it seemed that the odds were always against us. She was in New York and I was in California, different colleges that were thousands of miles apart. The only time that we got to see each other was for a few days at a time through out the semester, were days like this when one of us had a chance to miss classes without getting behind. The only time we got to see each other, for longer periods of time were at the end of the semesters when break began and Sana and I practically jetted to Miami. It also didn’t help Sana’s insecurity that I went to college with my ex-girlfriend. Things between Irene and I were completely over. We’d made amends and had complete closure but she was still one of my closest friends. I understood Sana’s doubt; after all I put her through in high school.  I could feel her doubt, every time I held Sana, she’d never mention it, but I could feel how she never wanted to let me go. Almost afraid that I wouldn’t come back to her. Just like she was right now. When the only thing that I wanted was to go back to her.