Chapter 15 - Departure

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I sniffle as tears prick my eyes. I was curled up on Niall's lap, sitting in the airport lounge. His strong arms were wrapped around me as we wait.

Waiting for what I like to call six months of hell to begin.

Six months of cold nights in bed alone, tossing and turning. Six months of aching for a kiss from Niall. Six months of trying to match up the time zones to call and Skype and text each other. Six months of waiting for the time to pass by. Six months of wedding planning by myself. Six months of love-sickness.

I am so not ready for this six months.

Niall's breathing was slowing as his face buried deeper into my hair on the top of my head.

We stayed up for hours last night. Making love from, with a good estimate, possibly 10PM to 4AM. I kept telling him to go to sleep once we finished, but he just shook his head, pressing our sweaty bodies together. He said that those last three hours of us together before the tour meant the world to him. That he better not waste it.

He even apologized for his occupation, for having to leave for tour. I told him to not ever dare let the words pass his lips again. If it weren't for him having this job, we would have never met.

He would never have went on the XFactor. He would have never lost to have been put in a band. He wouldn't have ever met the guys, never having met Zayn. He would have never seen me walk through the crowd at the airport. He would have never of in love with me. I would just be a broken girl living with a family that was unknown some time ago. But pushing me aside, he would have never became one-fifth of One Direction. There would be no One Direction. Niall wouldn't have- none of the guys would have saved all of the lives they did.

Niall may mean a lot to me, it may hurt like a bitch to see him go and to lost him for some months, but the fans deserve to see him more. They brought him this far. I can at least give them that much.

I can imagine just how tired Niall is. Staying up until the minute we had to get ready to go to the airport.

I remember vividly how his fingers traced my spine while he talked about the most nonsensical of things. Random thoughts or things he loved most about me or even what he was looking forward to after our wedding. Absolutely anything but tour. I remember how he sang to me as well, when he ran out of things to say. He sang Daylight by Maroon 5. That song seems to have fit perfectly with our situation.

Somehow, even after a fulfilling day like ours, I'm still not tired. I'm just sad. Extremely sad.

It's always hard come time for tour. Being away from someone you love so much for such a long time. Long distance relationships are hard.

My fingers gathered up the chest of his t-shirt, resting my temple on his shoulder. My knees against my chest. The tears drain down my face.

I ignore the yelling paparazzi and screaming fans. Some holding up posters they made specially for the boys.

The smell of Armani, Axe shampoo, and plain old Niall commixed to create such a wonderful scent that was currently burning in my nose; I loved every second of it though.

"I'm gonna miss you so much," I whimper.

"I know you will," he mumbles. His voice was thick with grogginess. He cleared his throat, pulling his head up to crack his tired sapphire eyes open to look at me. He held a tiny frown. His entire face screamed exhaustion. "I'm gonna miss you, too, darlin." He removed one hand from my hip to wipe away my tears. The saltiness lingered on my lips. "But ya gotta remember," he began, "we gotta make this work. We WILL make this work. Skype chats. Phone calls. Text messages. Letters. Whatever." He held up his pinkie, laying his temple against my forehead to stare at his hand. I crack a smile and giggle, sniffling. I lock my pinkie around his. I touch my lips to my pinkie as he does the same with his. Then he kisses my forehead.

"I love you," he mutters against my skin. My repeated words are unspoken but I know that he knew that I returned his love. His lips touch mine into a long soft kiss. The saltiness picks up in it. My hand goes up to tangle into his hair at the nape of his neck.

The taste of minty Crest toothpaste lingers in my mouth as we separate. Our foreheads rest against one another. I open my eyes to see his closed. A tear of his own slipped down his cheek.

I think that was one of the top ten things I loved most about Niall's personality. He was sensitive. He was always opened up. He didn't refuse anything when he needed to cry. He might be really hurt and try to act mad but he let his tears fall. He wasn't afraid of his emotions.

Most guys act all macho, like they don't have any emotions. That they're too manly to cry.

In my opinion, there's nothing manlier than a man who cries. Who isn't afraid of being sneered over for their tears.

I raise a shaky hand to wipe it away with my thumb. He opened his eyes to meet mine. I took my bottom lip between both teeth to chew on.

My eyes shift to the other couples, doing their own thing. After a minute, I look towards the flight schedule board.

Flight 142; 8:45AM.

(A/N: I've never road a plane or have been in an airport so I have no idea how to write that)

We got here at 8:15AM. We had a good five minutes left, at best, if I'm correct.

I look to Niall again to see him analyzing my face. "I'm gonna miss so, so much. Seeing that gorgeous face when I wake up; Cuddling close at night; the dates. All of it," he mumbles to me.

"I am, too." My voice is raspy. I purse my lips. I swallow the lump in my throat.

Yeah, I'll see him. Through television and computer screens. Looking into a camera will never feel the same as being there with them. Over a damned computer screen, I can't touch his skin or kiss his lips. I can't feel his body heat. I can't lay down in his arms.

It's never been easy with the long distance relationships. It's always been hard on both of us. We barely handled it the other times.

One of the things I'm ecstatic about: I'm a writer. That's my job. I don't have to be tied down to one place. After our wedding, I can go on tour with Niall if he wants me to. I won't have anything to keep me from going.

"Babe," he began just before the lady called his flight number. "Shit," he grumbled. I crawl off of his lap to stand up. He followed.

A deep ache inside of me began to burn, yearning for his body against mine; to feel his body heat.

He took my face into his large hands. The calloused rubbing against my skin. "Babe," he repeated. I look up into his big azure eyes, swallowing. The tears stained my cheeks. "When you get home, I got a present for you in the library. You need to get it immediately when you get home. I got it to.... keep you company. I got it the other day and I got-"

His flight was called again.

Present?

He swore under his breath. "I got Sam to drop it off after we left so it'd be a surprise," he said quickly.

"Niall, we gotta go," Paul sighed, running his hands over his tired face. Niall called over his shoulder for them to hold on. He looks at me again.

"Hurry to get home, okay?" There was a look in his eyes. Something stern and warning. "Ya gotta rush."

What gift was so important that I had to rush?

I nod against his hands. I sniffle. "I love you. I'll call you as soon as I get there," he said urgently before kissing me goodbye. He rushed towards the gate with his things. He looked at me over his shoulder before he disappeared.

What the hell just happened?

I share a confused look with Eleanor, Perrie, and Payton. Danielle was going on tour with the guys.

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