Unwanted Mate (WROTE WHEN I WAS 14 DONT TAKE IT SERIOUS ITS SO BAD BUT FUNNY

Chapter 39

Aiden

  I didn't accept. I didn't because I belonged with Adelaide and nobody else. But I needed to let her go, I didn't want to hurt her and I didn't deserve her. But I'll always know Adelaide was the one for me, the feelings I felt towards her were still there but weren't as strong because the bond was now broken because of me. I loved her, just a bit too much that it ruined everything.

But even after all this I still wanted to hurt her. I held back because this was my fault in the very beginning, I had a chance to get my shit together but I ruined it. There was no use in trying for her anymore. If Adelaide didn't do what she did, she could've been dead. Just like my mother.

I was just like my father. I have so much hate and evil built up inside of me exactly how he did. And I don't understand why.

I know Adelaide couldn't help me, I know there's no fixing for me. So I let her go, but yet I still was willing to wait for her to love me back even though I knew it was impossible.

The scary thing is, I didn't want to be fixed. There was something about being evil that I absolutely loved.

Before Adelaide left the moon goddess told me that there's someone out there for me still. I didn't understand how that could be since I didn't accept but I knew it was because the moon goddess wouldn't hurt me completely. She still gave me a chance because somewhere in her heart she still believed I can get better just not with Adelaide. I didn't want another mate, I didn't want to hurt anyone else. I also couldn't imagine me with anyone else except for Adelaide.

The moon goddess is so stupid to think I can get better. I knew I wasn't going to get any better if I had another mate. If my first mate couldn't fix me then nobody could.

This was me and forever will be me.

I was screwed for eternity, but surprisingly not completely.
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How are you guys feeling about all this??