All I Want Is You

Declan's Near Breakdown

Chase

It had been over a week since my run in with Taz at her father's birthday, I had stayed a while drinking tea and watching Thomas with his new car, I still had to argue a few more times with him, assuring him I would not take it back under any circumstances, if he didn't like it he could sell it, because it was his to do with what he liked.

Taz had returned downstairs after a while but was very quiet and subdued and no amount of coaxing from her parents or me could get more than the odd one syllable word from her, and a smile was out of the question.

After a while I made my excuses and left, I didn't want to be the one to spoil Thomas's special day.

But now I was feeling frustrated, depressed and angry, I had tried and failed to impress Taz, I was no further forward than that first dinner date with her parents and it was getting to me and a purely flippant remark from Andy at band practice the next evening, pushed me over the edge.

"Hey cool it man, for christ sake" shouted Daniel as he and William pulled me off Andy whom I had pinned to the wall and was in the process of throttling.

The red mist cleared and I released my hold and stepped back.

"You have no idea, no fucking idea" I bellowed with such venom I actually leant forward as I spat it out.

The rest of the band stood mouths agape staring at me, never had they seen me like this before, I started to pace the room like a caged tiger.

"I am a fucking rockstar for Christ sake, I have tattoo's all over my goddamn arms" here I pointed at my left arm for emphasis.

"I have my future in the palm of my hand" again I emphasised this by holding out my hand and slowly curling it into a fist.

"And then I royally screwed it up, why!" Now I was full on screaming.

"Because I'm no good, a fucked up ex drug addict and drunken bum that's why and do you know something I should fucking be dead, I'm a worthless piece of shit"

Whereupon I collapsed on the edge of the sofa holding my head in my hands, muttering to myself.

"Fucking worthless piece of shit"

"Hey" came a soft whisper as Andy Cooke slowly sat down next to me placed an arm round my shoulder.

"I'm sorry I didn't know this girl Taz meant so much to you"

I looked Andy in the eyes, fighting back my tears.

"Andy, I am so goddamn in love with her, I'm constantly in physical pain, I can't sing the songs I wrote about her because it makes me fucking tear up, me! a man in his mid twenties, a rock singer, fuck! I can sing about anything death, sex, drugs, violence no problem, but I can't sing a few songs with the word Taz in them because I start crying like a baby"

I bent my head down and shook it side to side.

"Shit man what is wrong with me?"

"Well man you have hit the nail on the head, you are head over heels for this girl you have it really bad, I don't know what you did to piss her off and I don't want to know, but for what it's worth the guys and I are behind you one hundred percent, ain't that right guys?"

Enthusiastic words in the affirmative were mutter.

"Hell yes" yelled Daniel "If this chick is the one that inspired you to write all those fucking awesome songs them, I'll do whatever to help you man"

More mutterings of agreement.

I looked up and saw the determined looks in the guy's eyes and knew they mean it.

"Thanks guys, I really mean that and appreciate your offers of help, but it's something I must figure out on my own"

"Hey" William interjected. "Have you tried flowers, presents, wining and dining her"

I nodded affirmative to all his suggestions.

This then opened the door to more of the guys ideas for getting Taz back.

"Put her photo out with a declaration of your love" Daniel offered.

"No way!" I stamped on that immediately. "She would hate that, Taz is into hiding and staying out the limelight, if I did that I would lose her for good and you guys mustn't say anything"

"Well considering we've never seen her, that's​ hardly likely now is it? Besides we would never do that we are mate's and mate's stick together right"

"Right" I mumbled, feeling stupid for doubting them.

"Hey, I've got it" and all our eyed turned and focused on William.

"Her mate's, I mean friends, get them on board and they will work on her for you"

"Nice try Will but I don't think she has any, not that I've seen anyway"

"Well what about the one's from before when you first met her in London are they still on good terms?"

"I don't know" now my brain was whirring.

"Back then she had really close friends, I'm not sure they kept in touch"

"Well man, there you go, find em, win them over with the Chase charm and you're in" Andy whooped.

Like the rest of the world the guys didn't know the full story of Taz and me, I was to chicken to tell them the truth only the Chase version.

"It's not that easy" I didn't know how much of what really happened they knew, but hell if this was the only way to get a second crack at Taz, I would face the wrath of her ex besties.

And now my brain was working and an idea was forming, Will was right I needed help and getting her back with her friends was a great idea, but it was only part of a great idea.

I needed to go all out, I needed everyone that Taz knew to like me, so that meant I had to prove to them that I was worthy of Taz giving me a second chance.

My heart lifted as it all came together in my mind, I would win over the whole goddamn community if I had to.

No way on this planet was I giving up, I was back on track, I want Taz back in my life, permanently!

I reached into my pocket and wrapped my hand around the small box that nestled there, stroking my finger back and forth over the mottled surface.

One day Taz, I pray to God one day I will when the time is right.

But for now Game on!