mine - j.g

thirty five;

two weeks later...

isabelle;

"it's fine, you have to tell him." alexandra said to me, "come on isabelle, you have to."

"but what if he looks at me different? what if... what if he leaves me?" i cry.

"well then who gives two fucks, isabelle!?" my sister yells, "if he leaves you for some stupid bullshit like this, then he's gotta fucking go and never come back! and if he leaves you, he'll be hearing from me!"

"you're right, you're right. thank you." i say, hearing jack come in the door, "he's home. i'll talk to you later, love you."

"love you too, call me when it's done, okay?"

i confirm i will, "alright, bye."

"bye." my sister hangs up the phone just in time.

jack comes into the kitchen, where i stand, holding my waist, "hey babe."

"hey." i softly speak, getting out of his grip to sit up on the counter, "uh.. i have to talk to you about something."

"okay? talk to me." he takes my statement lightly.

"jack.. it's serious. to me it is especially." my eyes tear up again, "you might leave, you might stay, you might think that.. that i'm worthless."

"hey, hey. you should know for a fact that i'd never leave or think you're worthless. why would i–" i cut jack off by kissing his lips hard, hungrily and passionately. letting him kiss back, makes me quickly release, "why'd you do that?"

"it might be the last time. and it was my way of saying shut up in a kind way." he nods, allowing me to speak, "um okay. so, i... uh, so while you were on tour, my period came. so, i'm not pregnant. and then i.. i went to the doctor, to see if i had a problem, or if something happened."

"and did something?" jack looks at me with concern, rubbing my thighs to keep me calm.

"i guess? jack, i can't give you what you want." i sighed, "fuck." i run my hand through my hair, "i can't have children, jack. i just can't." i sob, letting my head fall into my hands, "i'm so sorry." i cry harder again.

"stop crying, isabelle. baby please. don't apologize, okay? please don't apologize." he embraces me and after a few silent minutes, he speaks up again, "stop crying, baby." he kisses my neck, "it's okay, i promise."

"but.. but you want a family." i sob harder, "i can't give it to you."

"you're wrong, all i want is you. yes, a family would be nice, but isabelle... all i want is you. that's all i've ever wanted."