Where we belong

Chapter 23

Jessica's POV
I wake up with tears stained eyes and my mouth dry.
The spot on the bed next to me is empty and cold. As I pass my hand thro her spot a tear falls down my face. It runs so fast, like my checks being wet has became such a regular thing that the tears just flow.
Her spot still has her scent. A scent I got used to way to much. A scent I learned to only depend on. A scent I would recognize in the middle of millions. A scent I thought would be mixed with mine forever.
She was my oxygen. My only need. The one I only depended on. She was my home, my pare shoot.
And now she's gone. My oxygen is gone.
When I get the courage to leave the bed, I walk inside our closer, my closet, our closet.
Some of her clothes are still hanged on the hangers. My favorite ones of her are still here.
The black dress she wore for our first date, her red v-neck shirt, that was the shirt she was wearing the day I met her. The day I fell in love.
Her black leather jacket that I like to steal from her from time to time is on the couch, I wore it the last night we spent together. We went clubbing. We made promises we swore we'd never break. I wonder if it was in that night that she felt the need to get away.
As I pass my hand thro her clothes all the memories I have of her and I together with her wearing that clothes come up to my mind and I can't help but smile.
I remember us dancing in the middle of the road on September 20th, we left work so late that there weren't any cars on the streets. Sara stopped her car in front of mine and got out. I followed her and she put the radio music loud enough and then took me by the waist and we danced. We had eternity in that moment.
I remember the first time I cooked for her. The first time she cooked for me. May 6th, 2010. Our husbands weren't home and I left the kids with my mom. She made lasagna and it was perfect. That night I knew deep inside that she felt the same about me.
And I remember the last time we were together. Just us two.
We went to the cabin a few weekends ago. The kids were with Christofer and we took the weekend to date.
It was cold so we stayed inside the hole time but we didn't mind. Sara started a fire and I covered us with a blanket. We watched movies and drank hot chocolate, my favorite. We danced and sang as we drank red whine, her favorite.
I remember that weekend, I remember all of them. I remember every time you hugged me at work before we were together. I would count the times you would smile at me and die the days you didn't.
I remember every month, every week. Every day. I remember it all. And I know you do too..
Where are you this morning? Are you cold? Are you dry? Is someone looking after you?
I get changed and pass the girls room, empty. Luke's room, empty. I panic a little until I hear the tv downstairs and then I calm down.
As I walk down the stairs I hear sounds coming from the kitchen. Cooking sounds.
I pass thro the living room and the kids are all watching tv. Who's cooking?
I get into the kitchen quietly and watch.
I watch as the silhouette I know so well stands in front of me.
"Sara?"