Cut to the beat

Meet me

"Wake up! Patrick wake up!"

Patrick opened his eye to squint down at the small woman smacking his chest to wake him up. He smiled, he had missed waking up to Ellen all those years ago. She was so peaceful when you woke up before her. He yawned, rubbing his eyes and then it hit him. This comfort should not be there. It was probably why Ellen was hitting him up instead of leaving. They were not supposed to have spent the night together in an on call room in the pediatric ward. Not at all.

"I think I just had the best sleep since..." Patrick began to say since Everett was born but that can't be right. As if he had actually lost slept because of Everett. He had but not as a father caring for his son. As a father longing to care for his son. The absence of his son causing it. Ellen sat up, pulling the sheets to cover her breasts in a moment of modesty.

"This wasn't supposed to happen Patrick...I mean I don't-"

"Our focus is Everett let's forget about us today." Patrick interrupted her, reaching out to cup her cheek with his hand. Ellen held his hand, pulling it back. She shook her head.

"That's my problem. I don't want to forget us but everything is telling me to." She said softly, afraid to even say it out loud. Patrick took a deep breath. He moved to kiss her, stopping just as his lips brushed hers. His mind screamed no, but he could already taste the sweetness. Ellen leaned into it, their lips crashing for a moment before she pulled away. "Damnit." She whispered, getting up and sliding into her clothes from last night. Patrick watched her get dressed, reminiscing. He hadn't seen her do that in years. Just the simple task of sliding on a sweater and slacks. She walked to the bathroom to fix her hair. Patrick got dressed himself, going into the bathroom to spray some water on his hair and freshen up.

Ellen was staring into the mirror. She just didn't understand. Here she was sleeping with her ex while her son was dying. She rubbed at the circles under her eyes, sighing. Her phone rang in the bedroom and before she could protest Patrick picked it up, handing it to her.

"Ellen? How did everything go last night?" Chris asked between cries of a fussy Stella in the background. Ellen bit her lip, unsure what to say.

"Not the best but what could I expect. I'm staying for a while. I'll come home around lunch maybe. I have to spend time with Everett," she replied.

"Did Patrick show up?" Chris questioned. Ellen looked over at Patrick, focusing on his soft hair, and the way his arms were crossed over his chest. He was frustrated.

"Yes. I should go." Ellen said, hanging up. She wanted to go home. It sounded like Stella was having no fun with Chris, and this week was the week off from the nanny. But she couldn't leave, not now.

"Are you ready?" Patrick asked softly, dropping his arms. Ellen looked up at him sadly. Was she ready? Ready? She made a scoffing noise, turning away to leave the on call room. Patrick followed, placing his hand on her shoulder before she left. "Ellen. It's us. We're in this together, please. Come on. Don't push me out this time."

Ellen turned, her hair flying as she glared at Patrick. She had no words for him. She kept regretting last night, her heart ached. She didn't trust him not to leave her again. She didn't want this. She opened the door and turned down the hall to find Everett's room. He was more important.

---------

"Good morning Ellen, Patrick," The Doctor smiled, extending his hand as they walked into the private room. "I just finished rounds on Everett here and he's done really well. No further complications as of now."

"Thank you." Patrick nodded at the doctor, shaking his hand. Everett's adoptive parents came over, pulling them to the side.

"Let us introduce you to him." Mrs. Miller pleaded, "He knows nothing right now. He knows he's sick."