Avengers Texts

Part 51, Tony, Steve, and Peter: Warning- Plums and Puns Ahead

-Well if you haven't read Harry Potter then you might want to murder me after this chapter- 

-That's my version of a minor spoiler warning btw- 

Steve: Do any of you know where I can get plums 

Tony: Go find them yourself 

Steve: I can't, Bucky and I are watching Harry Potter 

Steve: I made everybody else go out and get them though 

Peter: Is that where everybody else is? 

Steve: Yes 

Tony: ... Steve, why are you like this 

Steve: Why am I like what? 

Steve: I'm #perf 

Tony: nOt aGaIN 

Peter: How many times has this happened? 

Tony: Enough to scar me 

Peter: Oh noooo 

Peter: I feel like I should be trying to escape right now 

Tony: YOU CAN'T ESCAPE 

Steve: HAHA YOLO 

Tony: NOOOOOOOOOOOO 

Peter: MAKE IT STOP, PLEASE 

Steve: Wait 

Steve: Wait guys I have a problem 

Peter: What is it? 

Peter: Is it that you have serious issues? 

Steve: No. Bucky ran out of plums. 

Steve: QUICKLY YOU GUYS I NEED TO KNOW WHERE THE CLOSEST PLACE I CAN GET PLUMS IS 

Tony: Why does he need plums 

Steve: I DON'T KNOW BUT I NEED TO GET THE PLUMS ASAP 

Peter: Is he going to set them on fire again? 

Steve: I'm sure that now he's done that seven times, he'll learn from his mistakes 

Tony: Wait wait wait. SEVEN times?! 

Peter: Yeah, I thought he'd only done that once. 

Steve: IT'S HIS LIFE 

Steve: HE CAN DO WHAT HE WANTS 

Steve: INCLUDING SETTING FIRE TO PLUMS 

Tony: SO THE FIRE ALARMS ARE WORKING PROPERLY 

Peter: Are you kidding me? You made me work on those for three hours this morning to see what was wrong with them. 

Tony: Ahem 

Tony: Character building? 

Peter: AFTER ALL THIS TIME, YOU'RE STILL USING THAT EXCUSE? 

Tony: Always. 

Steve: Are you serious? 

Peter: No, I'm Peter. 

Tony: You little rat. 

Peter: Oh deer. No need to get so upset. 

Tony: DON'T THINK THAT YOU CAN WEASLEY YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS ONE 

Peter: I'M NEVILLE GOING TO STOP 

-Steve has changed his name to Stevearooni- 

Stevearooni: THIS IS TURNING INTO A HARRY SITUATION. I'D BETTER HEAD FOR THE GRYFFIN-DOOR WHILE I STILL CAN 

Tony: YOU SLYTHERED-IN TO THIS CONVERSATION, AND NOW YOU CAN'T LEAVE 

Stevearooni: I JUST WANTED PLUMS AND NOW I'M PLUM TIRED 

Peter: But did you get the plums? 

Stevearooni: Well I stole them from a restaurant 

Tony: STEVE! PAY THE BILL! 

Peter: Yeah, he works at a bank, so he won't be happy with you. 

Stevearooni: JUST STOP 

Peter: No, I'll be with you to the very end 

Stevearooni: AAAAAAAAAH 

Tony: IF YOU TRY TO LEAVE THEN I'M GOING TO RAVEN-CLAW YOUR FACE OFF 

Stevearooni: Now I'm scared. 

Peter: But are you... petrified? 

Stevearooni: AAAAUGH 

Peter: J.K, man. I'm just kidding. 

Tony: I'm Rowling on the floor laughing. 

Stevearooni: Noooooo 

Tony: Yer an idiot, Steve. 

Stevearooni: ;-; 

Tony: #burnedlikefawkes 

Peter: I've seen Granger things. 

Steve: If you guys don't stop you're going to be deader than Harry's parents. 

Peter: Are you kidding me 

Tony: No, he's Sirius. 

Tony: Dead Sirius. 

Peter: duDE 

Peter: TOO SOON 

Steve: YOU'VE CROSSED A LINE 

Peter: I'M GOING TO HAVE TO MURDER YOU NOW 

Tony: But the real question is, would you kill me and push me out of a tower? 

Peter: !!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Stevearooni: KILL! DESTROY! 

Tony: How about just seriously injure? 

Peter: MURDER 

Tony: Oh deer 

-Tony has closed the chat- 

Overall pun/reference count: 26, unless I counted wrong 

Please don't kill me