Runaway.. (Jacksepticeye X Reader)

32- I deserve this

(Trigger warning: self harm)

Please do not read if triggered easily.

Your P.O.V

"YOU FUCKING LYING BASTARD!!!!!"

I quickly shot up and ran over to Sean, grabbing his shoulders trying to push him back into the room.

"Sean, go back in to the room so we can talk about th-"

He just kept screaming at Mark trying to get at him, who was just sitting speechless and quite terrified. Fucking gobshite.

"SEAN GET BACK IN THE FUCKING ROOM WHERE WE CAN BE CIV-" I was cut off by being flung against the door, hitting my head hard. Sean had shoved me into the door in anger.

I slid down the door, my legs unable to carry my weight. My vision was blury, but I saw the outline of Sean grabbing Mark's shirt. I weakly lifted my hand and lightly touched my aching head, It was bleeding. I tried to get up, but suddenly every went black, and I lost consciousness.

"I'm home.." I shout, hoping someone else would be home as well. It was my 13th birthday after all, I didn't want to spend it alone.

Nobody answered, which was unusual, I'd normally here Cora's voice. Maybe she's asleep.

I walk in to the sitting room that stinks of smoke and alcohol, to see my mother, smoking a cigarette on the couch.

She sighed in frustration and rolled her eyes when she saw I was home.

"Where's Cora?" I asked quietly.

"Gone." Her croaky voice replied bluntly.

"Gone where?" I asked curiously.

"Away." She replied again, taking a drag of her cigarette.

"Away wher-"

"STOP FUCKING ASKING QUESTIONS ABOUT CORA, OK?! SHES GONE. WE PUT HER UP FOR ADOPTION. WE DON'T FUCKING WANT HER, AND WE'LL DO THE SAME TO YOU IF YOU DON'T KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!"

I put my hand over my mouth and run up to my room. I cry and I cry and I cry. They took away my sister. My poor little sister. The only thing I lived for in this world was gone, thanks to my pathetic sick parents. They probably didn't even do it legally, they probably just dumped her outside the adoption centre and left.

I have no family left..

They all hate me...

Everyone hates me...

My pathetic little life means nothing to no one..

I hear my stomach growl. I haven't eaten in 36 hours...

I pull up my top to look at my bruised stomach..

Maybe I should eat something..

But then again, maybe I shouldn't.

Maybe I should suffer

I'm just a pathetic little bitch anyways.

I couldn't even protect my four year old sister..

I don't deserve food..

I walk into the bathroom and pick up the small blade, tears staining my face.

I deserve this.

"This one is for being a shitty sister..."

One..

"This one is for being weak.."

Two..

"This one...is for lying to Sean.."

Three.

I run my bloody arm under the tab, trying to wash the blood off, but it kept bleeding.

I deserve this..

Sean asked my if anything was wrong today, I answered no. I lied to him.

I walk back into my bedroom, And cry for the rest of the day.