Demolition Lovers [[GERARD WAY FANFIC]]

Words That Were Never Meant To Be Said

-Beth's POV-

I couldn't sleep.

I mean that was no surprise, but tonight it was for a different reason.

Orientation was tomorrow and I was stressed beyond belief.

At first, I'd been excited to attend college. I'd been excited to get away. I'd been excited to leave everything behind.

But apparently bad things just follow me. Nathan was here know, and apparently they went to the same university? I don't know what the odds were that I chose the same university as my brother who had stopped talking to me three years ago, but it had happened.

I didn't want to see Nathan.

Or Brendon.

Or Frank.

...

....

.....

Or Gerard...

I shook my head to myself as I say up in bed. I needed to stay away from him; I knew I needed to, but he was just so... Intimidating. Whenever he started talking to me, I immediately wanted to get away, but then he would just look at me with those hazel eyes and...

I shook my head again. I was just weak. That's it. I was just weak.

I was anxious because I was worried I would run into one of them at orientation... And I really wasn't up for a conversation with Nathan right now.

I checked my phone for the time and found it was 6:49. Orientation started at 8:30 am for freshman. I still had a little under two hours, but at this point, I wasn't going back to sleep.

I let my mind wander back to late yesterday, when I had come back from sitting from the bench.

When I had come back from talking with Gerard.

And I had yelled at Eric.

I had been angry with him.

I mean, I was angry lots of times, but I never let it out. The last time I remember telling was at Nathan....after mom...

I normally don't like yelling.

It usually just made me feel more guilty.

But this time---

This couldn't have anything to do with what Gerard said, could it?

No.

I couldn't let him get to me.

There's something wrong with that boy; I felt it. He was angry too, but he let his anger out...

But he was also so much more less scared of the world.

Rather, the world was scared of him instead.

I wonder what that felt like...

I wonder what if felt like to be the one in control...