Rachel's Turn

Chapter 41

Sunday passed by too fast and now it is Monday morning. Rachel sat in her car debating the best course of action to steer Cole away but not hurt him.. It seemed the more she thought about the situation with him, the more annoyed at herself she was for being so rude to him. She had to do the right thing and that was to apologize for her behavior and be honest with him. If he just wants to be friends then he will have to understand. Easy right?

Prying her fingers from the steering wheel, Rachel made her way out of her car and across the parking lot to the school buildings. Her senses were heightened as she wondered when Cole would pop up. She usually sees him by the lockers every morning but he was not there today. Maybe he is running late. Well, if he doesn't come it will be easier for me.

Rachel's sat through all her morning classes and never caught a glimpse of Cole. He definitely must not be here or I would have seen him. She thought. It was srange as he never missed, but maybe he caught a stomach bug that has been traveling around school. Trying to clear her thoughts, she made her way to the cafeteria to find Amy.

Sitting at the table with Amy and a few others, Rachel scanned the room one last time before starting to eat. "Rachel, are you still down? I thought we talked about everything and you look off. Did something else happen?"

"No, nothing else has happened and I am 100% confident that talking to Cole is what I need to do, but I guess it won't be today."

"Girl, you have to talk to him and get this over with before it becomes a bigger issue than it already is. Just go talk to him." Amy tried to urge her friend to take a stand and take hold of the situation just like they had discussed over the weekend.

Shaking her head with a grin, Rachel replied. " I am going to talk to him, but since he is not in school today looks like I can't very well talk to him now can I?"

Amy sat confused. "Um, Rachel, are you sick? Cole is at school so you better not be trying to fake a mental illness to get out of talking to him."

Now, Rachel was confused. Cole would have passed her at least four or five times just during lunch, but she had not seen him all morning and he was not in the lunch room either. "Amy, he is not here today. I have not seen him all day. Have you seen him?"

Nodding her head yes, Amy took a sip of her drink and motioned toward the window. Rachel was shocked at what she saw. He was sitting outside under a tree in the grove eating his lunch. Cole never ate outside anymore. As if he felt her gaze, he looked up and for a brief moment they made eye contact. He shook his head and walked off. Is Cole Baker ignoring me?

Before Rachel realized what she was doing, she was half way down the path to the choir room all the while looking for Cole. Her frustration fueled her steps as she reached the doors and stomped down the steps. The door hit the wall as she stormed through with the sole purpose of pulverizing Cole. Luck was on her side and there he sat alone in the back row with his headphones clamped to his ears.

She ripped the headphones off his head. "Geez Rachel what the hell?.....Ouch!!! You slapped me!!!!" Yep, she did it, she slapped him.

"How dare you walk around ignoring me all! I thought you were all hell bent on being my friend, so I guess you got tired of waiting and decided to go back to treating me horribly and ignoring me? Great Cole, just great, and here I was going to apologize to you and now I see that I have been right this whole time. You never wanted to be friends." Rachel stood in front of Cole unleashing her pent up rage.

Cole rubbed his cheek where she had slapped in moments prior and the warmth of her touch burned into his skin as his temper rose. "Ignore you? IGNORE YOU? I thought you did not want me around you anymore. If I recall two days ago you yelled at me and told me I was ruining YOUR life. And many times before that, you keep telling me to leave you alone or disappear. You have been nothing but rude to me." He was now pacing back and forth in front of her and running both hands through his hair. "I am trying to be your friend but you won't let me. I haven't done anything mean to you and have apologized for before and you have the guts to tell me I am ruining YOUR life? I am trying to stay out of your way Rachel because I do not want to ruin your life and even though it's killing me to see you so crazy lately, I am trying to do the right damn thing for you and stay away. Damn it what do you want from me?"

He had never exploded this severely before and her heart raced and tears battled to breach her eyes. She was so tired of all the yelling and frustration and just wanted to stop everything. He was right. She had been mean to him and rude and slapped him. Oh my goodness, I really slapped him. Realization of just how far this situation had gone overwhelmed her and the tears she was fighting won over and spilled down her cheeks.

Cole hated it when Rachel cried. She had shed too many tears and he could not help himself. He walked to her and gently wiped a tear from her cheek, which made her jerk away. "Sorry, Rachel. Just don't cry ok. I hate seeing you cry. Look I am sorry I lost my head just now, but I don't know what to do here. I don't want to fight with you anymore. Please, tell me what I can do to make this all better. How can I get you to trust me again? Please Rachel. Just tell me." At this point, Rachel and sat in a chair and he was situated in front of her on his knees.

With tear stained cheeks and glistening eyes, Rachel lifted her gaze to him. She was unsure what to say but her mouth formed them for her as she spoke. "I don't want to fight either and I don't want to ignor you or you ignor me. Cole, I just don't know how to handle this without making everyone mad at me.I am so confused."

Picking up on what Rachel was neglecting to add, he asked, "You mean you don't want to make Ryan mad?" Rachel nodded and he felt like he had been kicked in the chest. Seeing this fragile partially broken girl in front of him, he realized that this was not as much about her and him, but with her and Ryan. "Rachel, you don't have anything to be upset or worried about, Ryan cares about you and trusts you. You have not done anything and Ryan would not be mad at you for having a friend. It's not like you still like me anyway." Cole half giggled at the last statement hoping to lighten the mood.

Caught a bit off guard by his last statement, her eyes met his and it seemed as if her inner most thoughts were being exposed. Do I still like Cole? Does he think I do? Have I been acting like I do eventhough I am with Ryan? Ideas flooded her mind but she remained still.

"Rachel, hello. You in there? Did you hear me? Ryan has nothing to worry about right? You don't still care about me? Right?" Their eyes did not falter and remained as if trying to decipher the others thoughts. Rachel looked up and her doe eyes sent shivers down Cole. Did she still like him? He had to know but before he could make another sound, the bell rang and 20 choirs members began to fill the room, giving Rachel her chance to take a seat in her section and avoid his questions.

****** What do you thing so far? Should she go to Cole ? Thanks for reading and keep commenting. I need feedback.