Karma's Happenstance Part 2 (Nikki Sixx/OC/Guns n Roses)

Sixx's waking soul

Tour Bus
On the road
4. May 1988

Nikki's POV

I awake to the soft sound of an acoustic guitar playing some soft little melody. I know without looking it's Izzy. I don't hear anyone else so I know everyone else must be asleep. Since I'm not fucking sleeping much these days I decide to roll out of my bunk for some company. I know Izzy and I haven't had the best friendship, but honestly, he had grown on me. I think it had a lot to do with that damn drink.

"Hey," I say and pop down next to him.

His eyes are slow to meet mine. He stops playing for a moment and reaches for a bottle of whiskey.
"Hey," he says as he takes a drink.

"Thought you were trying to be sober these days," I note and think about the baby I'm not supposed to know about. Fuck why do I care about this shit? Goddamn that fucking drink.
Izzy just nods and stares down at his guitar.

"Everything ok?" I ask him noticing his odd behavior.

He shrugs with a sigh, "MJ's having a baby."

"Do you want it?" I ask him curiously because his attitude suggests this isn't really a good thing.

"We haven't been together a year even. I'm still doing dope..." He pauses shaking his head,
"How am I supposed to be a good parent and be like this?"

I honestly have no fucking clue what to say. But I completely get his fucking point.
"I'm sure Yakinamundo would tell you this is meant to be."

Izzy rolls his eyes, "Like he doesn't know, right?"

I smile. Silence fills the air as Izzy takes another gulp.

"You know," I say, "I think you'll do just fine Izz. You're really pulling your shit together." Wow Did I say something nice? What the fuck is wrong with me? "MJ's the best, and she loves you so much."

Izzy looks at me strangely. "You on ecstasy man?"

I slightly chuckle, "No, I'm just happy for you guys. I kind of feel like I played a role in all that shit for you."

Izzy smirks, "You coming to collect that first born of mine now?"

I squint my eye and look up, "Mmmm, I dunno, you think it might be a girl?"

Izzy's eyes cut over at me. "You know I'd fucking kill you in your sleep if you ever look at a daughter of mine, right?"

"I'll be sure to sleep with one eye open then, "I smile with a cocked eyebrow.

Izzy smiles and looks back down to his guitar. "Guess I'm gonna have to ask her to marry me huh?"

I sigh, "I think MJ wants that, yeah. What about you?" Fuck me, what am I, a fucking counselor?

"I love her, I do, but every thing's happening so fast. I thought we'd be together a while before this shit happened. My life is too crazy for this shit right now. I wanted to be settled, have a house, be financially stable and shit before marriage and babies."

"You're not ready are you?" I ask. And I actually care. Jesus Christ!

"I don't know...fuck it's still a shock I guess. I love her so fucking much...I just don't wanna let her down."

"You're always s hard on yourself man," I shake my head. "Stop trippin, you'd never let MJ down. I say go for it, marry her and have a dozen little Stradlin's."

Izzy eyes me suspiciously again. "What the fuck are you on? You never talk this way."

I sigh and think a moment. I guess if there was anyone I could tell about Yakinamundo it would be Izzy. Hell he's the only one who could possibly understand. "I went to see Yakinamundo again..."

Izzy's eyes snap up to mine. "And?" He asks with a dry gulp.

"He told me I had to find my soul mate. He did say you had found yours."

Izzy smiles.

"He gave me this drink...and he told me it would open my eyes, make me drop my walls, and start feeling. He said I lived like I was always on a stage. Told me now I could stop living above everyone and learn to live with them. He wants me to fall in love and shit."

"Well," Izzy sighs, "I think whatever you drank must be working, you're losing the asshole in you."

I smirk, "My head is so fucked up man. I fucking cry watching shit on TV now like a girl. I'm sitting here giving you advice and comfort and shit...It's fucking scary to feel every fucking thing."

"No shit," He smirks, "And how's the search for Mrs. Sixx going?"

"Not great," I shrug "The only chick I am remotely interested in is..."

I stop myself and think hard. Holy shit. Is it Amy? Is she the one? Izzy is hanging on my words waiting for me to finish. My lack of speech must tell Izzy what I can't.
"You know Axl would fucking kill you right?"

"Am I that obvious?" I unsurely ask him.

He just nods. "And I think she has a thing for you too...but like I said...Axl. Will. Fucking. Kill. You."

I sigh, "Yeah...but fuck she drives me wild man. You think she's why Yakinamundo did this shit to me?"

"Hell I don't know, but I kinda like the new and improved Sixx, you seem more real."

"Well I fucking hate it...I mean fuck I'm not even wanting to get high and shit...I don't know what to do, what to think, what I feel...It's super fucking confusing when I've spent so many damn years avoiding feeling anything at all."

"It's not so bad feeling shit you know," Izzy shrugs.

"It is to me Izz. It's foreign and uncomfortable. I've never been so fucking scared in my goddamn life. I don't understand any of this shit. And this fucking shit with Amy...I mean fuck why is Yakinamundo rushing me? I'm only 29."

"I'm only 25 man, look at what's on my plate, marriage and babies right as this band if fucking finally taking off. Talk about timing to someone else," He frowns.

"So you are going to ask her to marry you?" I ask him.

"Well yeah, I just wasn't planning on it so soon you know." He says and offers me the bottle of whiskey.

I stare at it. I don't even want it. "I'm good," I shake my head.
Really?? "So you like grew up with Axl and Amy, right?"

Izzy nods and lights a cigarette.

"What's she like?"

Izzy shakes his head with a smile, "Well she was raised in the same house with Axl, what do you think?"

"So she's crazy too?"

"Not like Axl," he sighs, "But she is a fiery red head. I can't tell you much really, I always tried to avoid her so Axl wouldn't think I wanted to fuck his sister or some shit. If you were wise you would do the same."

"I wish I could man. But I just can't stop thinking about her. I keep almost kissing her and shit. I mean, what if she is the one I'm supposed to be with? I mean why else would I actually keep turning down pussy? The shit is thrown at me, and the chicks are fucking hot!"

"Well if she is the one you better be ready for the gates of hell to release all of Axl's fucking rage."