Needing You - Sequel to Wanting You

Chapter Twenty Nine

He hadn't spoken a word since coming home.

He had only been at the station for two hours but in those two hours it felt like a lifetime, his mum and sister weren't speaking or telling me anything. They were just as upset as I was, asking me if I knew what it was about, thinking that I knew and wasn't aloud to tell them.

Was this why he wanted to fly out of the country in the morning, to hide from it all and not face facts.

I ended up going to bed, this was all to much for me, loosing the babies and now my ex boyfriend was dead, this was a nightmare.

I had woken up not long after falling asleep and thrown up, noticing Blake wasn't in the bed or the house I walked outside to find him.

He was laying out the back watching the rain, empty beer bottles around as he tiled his head back an sculled another one, took him four large swigs until he tossed it to the lawn with the others.

I made my way slowly towards him and my heart broke even more when I realised he was crying, hard sobs breaking through as his body shook. He hadn't realised I was near him until I sat down on the same lounge chair as him and brought my hand up to his arm, he looked over, eyes red and bloodshot “why aren't you asleep?” he frowned looking annoyed.

“I was sick and couldn't find you” I rolled my eyes about to take my hand back when he pulled his arm around my back and pulled me over so I was laying next to him, pulling me closer to him as my leg went over his “I love you so much Lex, I'm so sorry I wasn’t there for you when you had the babies” he broke down crying again.

“we will get through this together ok” I looked up bringing his face to meet mine.

“it just hurts so fucking bad” he closed his eyes grabbing my face as he leant his head against mine, I look at the man I love who was hurting more than he let on, here he was pouring his heart out to me in nothing but tears.

I had never seen a man cry like this in my life before, I never even thought they knew how to, but seeing Blake like this was absolutely heartbreaking, I cupped his face rubbing his tears away with my thumb “Blake” I whispered, his eyes opened looking straight towards me as more tears leaked down “we will get through this together, it may take ages but I need you, I don’t have anyone else but you and I know you try to act strong around me and you don’t need to, I love you so much just don’t push me away, let me in so we can help each other” I watched as his eyes closed then flicked open.

His hands slid up around my neck and pushed my head forward to his, his mouth over mine firmly as we kissed in a hungry passion, I whimpered as his tongue swept against my mouth, pulling me closer into him as his body half lay over mine, I ran my hands through his hair as I kissed back needing him desperately.

We pulled apart slowly, still nipping little kisses against each other as neither of us wanted the kissing to stop, it had been so long since we kissed like this and I missed it, I missed this closeness we shared so well together.

“I didn’t mean to push you away, I love you so much and I just didn't want you to see this side of me Lex, I'm mean to be the one who's strong for you, not the other way around” he sighed.

I shook my head as I ran my hands through his hair “don't be, I want you to talk to me about anything, I will always listen to you” I assured him.

“come into the house, there's some things I need to tell you Lex, but please don't speak until I'm done, I need to get this out and it's going to be hard to explain if your yelling at me, I know your going to hate me and possibly leave and that's why I haven't said anything to you about what happened with Jenny yesterday” he looked at me as he waited for my response and when I nodded me placed another kiss to my lips and moved off me.