Werewolf and Vampire Mate [Book 1 Complete]

chapter thirteen.

April

Leaving the barn behind, I run past the log cabins and playing children and into the woods, veering off the dirt path and collapsing against a tree on a soft bed of ferns and moss.

Drawing in oxygen is impossible. It's like a fist has seized my lungs and holds them as tightly as possible.

Harper has panic attacks sometimes and I've brought her out of a few, helped to calm her down.

But I've never had one of my own, except for perhaps at the motel room when I first found out about werewolves.

I let my head fall between my knees and I press the heels of my hands to my eyes.

"April?"

I look up and Reed is rushing toward me. In an instant, he's in front of me, crouching down.

"Sweetheart? Are you ok?"

Tears crest my cheeks and splatter onto my hands as I clutch my knees and shake.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, this was too much too soon," he says. Pain twists his features, like the panic I feel causes him an equal amount of distress. "What can I do to help?"

I can't speak, but I crawl toward him and without hesitation, he wraps his arms around me and cradles me against his hard body.

"You're ok," he murmurs into my hair, rocking me gently back and forth as my breathing starts to become less choppy. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to. I promise."

He strokes my hair and lets me wet his shirt with my tears. Eventually, he leans back against the tree. I'm not ready to let go of him though, curling up further in his lap, my head resting against his shoulder.

I sniffle, unable to stop the gasping breaths that jolt through me after a big cry. "I don't know if I can deal with all of this," I whisper.

"You don't have to," he is quick to say. "I've put too much on you, I'm sorry. I swear it won't happen again. The last thing you need right now is to be bothered by politics."

The crying and gasping finally over, I wipe my cheeks with the hem of the shirt I wear and momentarily press myself against his warmth before pulling away. "Reed, I understand you have responsibilities here. And I understand that you think that I'm...destined to be with you. But I have a life. I have plans and friends and I don't know how you can expect me to just give that up."

He leans his head back against the tree trunk and closes his eyes, letting out a long breath. It gives me a moment to unabashedly take in his features. I study the strong column of his throat, the powerful flex of his arms. Dark stubble has begun to pepper his jawline. "I didn't think it would all be so complicated," he says.

I move to sit beside him, my shoulder pressing into his bicep. "What do you mean?"

His eyes open and, as he looks up at the canopy shading us above, I see how well he fits in here, in the forest. Even his eyes match the leaves. It's like he was born here, in the dirt and earth and grass.

"My father has drilled in this innate sense of duty into me for as long as I can remember," he explains quietly. "I needed to be the perfect leader, so I always planned everything carefully. When I was twelve, a vampire attacked our pack and killed...someone close to me. Everybody was so angry; they wanted all the vampires dead."

"But you didn't?" I question softly.

He shakes his head. "I was angry. But I wanted the bloodshed to end. So I started thinking of ways to stop the fighting. I drafted the first version of the truce when I was thirteen. I always knew that I wanted to create peace. And now I've gone and done the opposite."

"Because of me," I faintly mutter.

"It's not your fault." He turns his head to look at me. "You know, I had other plans too. I planned that when I found my mate, everything would be perfect. I would be nothing less than what she deserved. I would be kind and honest and supportive and I would never let anything hurt her." Pain hardens his jaw. "And the first thing I ever did was hurt you."

"It was an accident." My voice is a whisper in the wind.

"It doesn't matter." He stands up and his expression is the most closed off it has been since I met him. The open honesty that he greeted me with in that motel room is gone. He holds a hand out for me and helps me to my feet. "In the morning I'll take you home. I'll set up a roving guard near your house so that you'll be safe from the vampires, but I..." He looks away, swallowing. "I'll stay away from you, April."

"Hold on." I shake my head. "I didn't say that was what I wanted."

"Isn't it, though?" There is a hint of desperation in his eyes, like he wants me so badly to refute him, to say that I want to stay.

But...Maybe he's right. Maybe it is better if I put all of this behind me. In less than a year, I'll be in Yale Law and this entire ordeal will be like a bad fever dream.

Why does that particular future seem so desperately unappealing?

"I need to go home," is all I can say.

He nods and leads me back to the trail and through to the clearing with the farmhouse that I woke up in this morning.

There are still many people milling about as the sun draws lower in the sky.

"Orson! There you are, I've been looking for you." A woman hurries over to us, carrying a crying baby girl in her arms, a young wolf pup trailing at her heels. She looks frazzled, her hair a mess of curls around her flushed face. "The water stopped working at the cabin again and I swear I've tried everything and the baby needs to be fed and–"

"It's alright, it's ok," Reed stops her, his voice soothing. He reaches out for the baby and takes her in his arms. "I'll come and fix the water now, I promise."

"Thank you," the woman sighs in relief and then her gaze lands on me. "Oh! Are you...?" She looks between Reed and I.

"This is April, my mate," he introduces and the woman's eyes go wide.

"Oh it is so lovely to meet you," she says warmly and I manage a smile, hoping my face isn't puffy and red from crying. She touches her cheeks in embarrassment. "And I'm interrupting your first day together, I'm so sorry."

"No need to apologize," Reed says strongly. "You asking me for help is never an imposition. Let's go back to the cabin and I'll have a look." The baby now settled and looking sleepy, he hands her back to her mother and turns to me. "Are you going to be ok in the house on your own for a bit? I won't be long."

I nod. "I'll be fine."

"Help yourself to whatever you want. North is around here somewhere, so you can ask him—or anyone—if you need something," Reed says. I don't think North likes me much, so I probably won't be asking him for anything, but I agree anyway.

Reed squeezes my hand, sparks fluttering up my forearm, and then turns and leaves me.

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