Through the Years with Nick and Charlie

You're not here

Charlie

    Day 7 was filled with packing and cleaning before we headed off to the airport to go home, which is where we are now...well one of us.

    Once we had arrived in England, Nick ordered us an Uber to take home. By time the driver arrived, it was already 12:43, and since we had an hour long drive ahead of us, I went to sleep on Nick's shoulder, my personal pillow.
     When we finally arrived back home, Nick woke me up and gave me the keys to the house while he got all of our bags, this was one of the few times I didn't mind not helping. Once we both got into bed, I don't remember a thing after, so we must've went to sleep.

    But!! Jump to now, 11am, I'm in our bed by myself. At first, I just went back to sleep thinking that Nick would come back to bed, but after more than 20 minutes passed, I got concerned.
    Now I'm getting up to go greet him downstairs. I grab the nearest jumper of nick's, my slippers, and my phone. As I pick it up, I realize it's from Nick. I sigh already having a feeling what it's about.

Nickyy😛😍

(6:50am)- hi love, coach called me in today so I'm at training rn

(6:50am) - so sad I couldn't wake up with u today... I love you lots

    "the fuck" I mumble under my breath while plopping back onto the bed. I message him back

Me:

(11:04)- hi... will u be back soon or it's a full session

(11:04)- u promised we would go to the shops for baby stuff

(11:05)- I love youu
     

   I closed out of the iMessage app not expecting a text back so soon. I went on my socials trying to keep my mind off of the situation but, you know me.
    I know that I should be so grateful for everything that Nick does for me, us, and I am. It's just the things like this that make me upset and worried. I know that we literally just came back from a week long holiday, just the two of us, but I was really looking forward to this today, and, in my defense, he did promise.
     I try not to think so selfishly because I know that he wants to be here and doesn't purposely choose not to, but I also know how much being on the Olympic squad and rugby in general means to Nick. I know what I signed up for when I agreed to stay with and marry the rugby star but, these are the times that I selfishly wish he had a "normal" job.
    
     I felt a couple of tears start to shed as I got far too deep into my thoughts.

     I told Nick a few years back that I didn't want kids if I had to go through it alone.
    Now that im pregnant, he won't be at any future appointments, I won't see him for days at a time starting next month, it's not guaranteed that he'll be at his own kid's baby shower not birth, and now, we can't even make a trip to the shop's together. And it's all because of this dumbass sport that my husband plays, making me watch nearly every weekend, and somehow, I still don't understand all of it.

   After sitting with my thoughts for a little longer, I realized an hour had already passed, so I decided to do something with myself.
    Getting up, I checked my phone once more, reading the text that I just received. I didn't have the energy to respond to Nick right now but I did anyways as I didn't want him to think I was mad

Nickyy😛😍

(11:53am)- baby I'm so sorry but I'll be back at 8...probably will be too late by then
   

Me

(12:01)- that's ok...we'll go some other time😁

   After I responded, I decided that I would get ready for whatever the day brings me. I took a shower and threw on joggers and a different random jumper of nicks. At first, I was gonna fix up something to eat and watch Tv but, we had absolutely no food since we cleared everything before our holiday. I decided that I would make a quick trip to the shops.