I did not sleep that night. The fear of going to sleep to face Lilith was overwhelming and it kept me awake tossing and turning. So when breakfast came around and the start of the first day of games began i was already exhausted.
I had breakfast with my group before going outside with everyone. As everyone gathered around the make shift arena for the games. Basically it ends up being a more down graded version of last years black games. They had a small arena and were to go capture the small but aggressive creatures in the space and also eliminate each other. Takes half the time to complete but its what they do.
I however kept my distance and found a place from a great distance to observe everything going on. I aimlessly walked around in the snow making a pattern with my feet to entertain myself. Olivia approached me but also kept her distance because some people were watching us.
"Hey love did you sleep last night?" She asked me. I stopped walking and looked at her
"I think i saw Dante last night but i dont know." I told her she was surprises.
"I thought he was still in lockdown in heaven since they havent opened back up yet." Olivia asked confused by the situation.
"I thought so too but if it was him he was cast from heaven and is slowly becoming a demon because of hid diet." I explained to Olivia no emotions in my voice as i turned to look at the grey sky. "He was scared and said he had something to tell me but he disappeared before he told me what it was and i dont even know if it was actually here because it was so quick it felt like a hallucination." I mumbled mostly but Olivia heard me. I know she did because of the next question she asked me
"Have you been hallucinating?" Olivia asked i looked at her unimpressed by her question.
"For the past ten years apparently." I told her reminding her when i could see things no one else could see. My ghost vision is very weak now but its still there it's always been there. Olivia didnt like my comment "its common for me to see things normal peopl;e can't. I have always been able to see past that veil. Now i can travel past the veil but can't see past it so i dont know if Dante was a glimpse from behind the veil like before but i dont know." I told her feeling defeated my shoulders dropped and tears pricked my eyes as i turned my attention back to the sky
"So what's bothering you?" Olivia asked me when i dint keep talking
"I feel like Dante was going to ask me to kill him." I whispered not actually wanting her to hear me.
"Gem i can't hear you" Olivia told me slightly annoyed because i was avoiding talking to her.
"I think Dante came too ask me to kill him." I told her loud enough for her to hear me now. Olivia looked at me "but that's just a feeling i have. I have no idea what he wanted but he was scared about being caught talking to me so i dont know. It's all speculation.' I added before i walked towards her
"Would you do it?" She asked me
"I dont know." I answered her truthfully. "I dont want to. He is my best friend. I want to help him its in my power to help him but i dont understand why he rejected my help." I spoke as she walked with me
Olivia dint answer me as we walked it was a comftable silence and i think she knew i didnt want to talk. Sometimes I just need to think it though and dwell on it for a while to understand.
"You should go rest you dont look too good." Olivia said using he back of her hands to feel my face as if she was checking for a temperature.
"I have a mild headache. Nothing I can't handle." I said with a smile as i looked at her. "I love it when you baby me love but i am capable." I reminded her. Olivias eyes looked sad as she looked at me and it made me question my own wellbeing. Was i really not okay? I felt mostly fine. Other then being a little sleep deprived i was fine. Right? Apparently not.
It came so suddenly I couldn't fight it. Lilith. She got into my head again. Tore it apart to Get inside my mind. I hate it when i am right. But i felt her threats i dint brush them off so i was prepared for her. I was prepared to fight her but not for her to tear though my mind to get into it.
I was in the veil now. But i was stuck in the veil unable to get out. Nothing around me but darkness. I felt like i was floating. I felt Lilith presence all around me now.
"Welcome back." Her voice echoed thought the endless darkness and i was unable to locate where she was. It sounded like she was coming from everywhere.
"I felt you. I felt your threats and i was prepared for you to try something." I called out into the darkness
"Im flattered." Her voice echoed before she appeared in front of me suddenly frightening me. I flinched backwards and prepared to fight her which made her laugh manically as she grinned at me "i pulled you into my mind this time. You wont be able to get out until i let you out." She informed me amused
"I have been practicing for shit like this." I told Lilith and began o pull back on her hold over me.
Lilith was visible struggling against me and the mental battle we had in place she became aggravated and began to attack me. I protected myself as she stable me me hit me burned me and whatever else she could do to hold me down in her mind. But i kept pulling with every ounce of mental strength i had in me trying to get free of her grasp. I could feel what felt like fibres slowly tearing apart around me.
"You can't escape me!" She yelled laughing maniacally as she continued to hurt me i didnt feel the pain of her hits so I was unbother by her attacks and focussing on getting out of here.
"I wont let you hurt me anymore!" I screamed at her shoving her back away from her.
I lost sight of Lilith in the darkness that surrounded me. It was growing darker if that was even possible. I could no longer see my feet below me or my arms outstretched in front of me. It was like the darkness was a liquid and filling the space. I took a deep breath to calm myself down. Closing my eyes i cleared my mind because calling forth my power.
"My goddess lend me your power." I called out before feeling the flames of Freya's power engulf my body.
Opening my eyes the flames illuminated the space around me. Lilith presence was fading was she running away? Looking around the space i used my flames to illuminate the darkness. I couldn't see or feel Lilith presence anymore so i continued to try and get myself out of the veil.
I dont know how long it took to pull myself back to my own body and mind, when I opened my eyes i was greated with the blinding light of the sky. Leaning over me was Olivia and she looked somewhat annoyed with me.
"One of these days you will listen to me." She spoke with annoyance
"I was fine." I spoke sitting up holding my head
"You passed out," she reminded me
"Because Lilith got her claws into me again." I mumbled because my head was pounding
"What?" Olivia asked alarmed
"I feel a little less crazy now knowing that she still has a hold on me and I wasn't just imagining it." I spoke relieved now. I was actually happy to know she did have a hold on me. All this time i have been feeling like im going insane with the nightmares and flashbacks. It could all literally be because of her.
"Why do you sound happy about it?" Olivia asked surprised
"Because for six months everyone's been calling me crazy because i still felt her connected to me. No one believed me when i said she was still there tormenting me." I told her like it was obvious and i was frustrated because she was also one of them people who made me feel crazy even death made me feel insane. "I dont want to get angry with you love but you have been doing it too lately. I can over look the lack of understanding of my ptsd but making me feel crazy for what im feeling doesn't help me." I whispered not wanting to fight with her but needing to tell her how I was feeling.
"Im sorry i made you feel crazy." Olivia told me moving closer to hug me it was comforting "ill listen better. I forget how connected you are to everything around you sometimes because you always hide it when things bother you." Olivia whispered to me and kissed my temple making me smile at her
I was feeling so much better then this morning. I didn't feel so drained anymore. The heavyweight that had been sitting on my chest was gone when i woke up. Maybe i managed to get ride of her completely this time. God i hope so. I dont want to deal with that psycho anymore.
