GROUNDING 🏈 Nick Bosa

#THIRTY EIGHT.

"Me too. I can't see him, oh my god." I start freaking out again.

"We gotta hide. Follow me." Joey answers.

Nick and I run after Joey and hide behind a shed that was in the corner of the backyard. For some reason, it was a little fun. This made me feel like a teenager again.

Nick starts laughing and Joey covers his mouth. "Shhhh.." he says.

"It's just funny we're hiding from our own dad like, is going to kill us?" Nick replies, in a chuckle.

"He will kill us, bro."

"What?!" I ask, frightened by that comment and at the moment, lack of understanding that he was being sarcastic.

We hear the sliding glass door open. "Nick!" He shouts out again. He then goes to the gym and looks around inside— or at least that is what we were all assuming. Finally, after not finding anyone their dad leaves.

We all lean our backs against the shed, breathing out sighs of relief and also, just generally cracking up like little kids over the fact we were three grown adults hiding.

*

I wasn't sure how many hours had past of us being outside, but we eventually all decide unanimously to go back in the house. We all get glasses of water once inside and sit down on the couch.

Nick turns on a movie and sits next to me, putting back on his sling. I was worried that now that we were all coming down from being high, he'd bring up Joey and I again, but he doesn't.

We were all exhausted from what we had just experienced so, the three of us ultimately pass out.

*

Nick wakes me up.

"Hey, Liliana. It's time to go." He says, lightly shaking me.

I open my eyes and look at him, he looked... sad.

"What time is it?" I ask.

"It's seven pm." He replies.

"Damn, already?" I stretch. "Can I just spend the night? I feel a little hazey." I ask him.

"No, you really can't. I don't at all feel comfortable with that." He answers.

"Oh, okay. I get it." I say, sitting up and fixing my hair.

He walks me out to my car and I stare at him for a moment. "Are you okay?" I nervously, ask.

"No, I'm not oh fucking k, Lili." He says, harshly.

"I understand.." My eyes start to tingle with tears again. "—But are we okay?" I ask, hesitantly.

"No, Liliana. We are done." He bluntly, says.

"Done?" I gasp. "—Like really done?" My stomach starts to turn in circles.

"Yes, you fucked my brother. There is no way I'll ever get over that." He answers, avoiding my stare.

"No, wait..." I clench onto his t-shirt just below his sternum, I can feel his heart beating really fast. "Nick... I can't do this... please don't say that. I can't be without you." I confess.

"Then, you should have thought about that before you did what you did, Lili."

"What I did?" I huff. "What about what you did?"

"What did I do, Liliana?"

"You said things that I thought I would never get over, but I forgave you, Nick. You also hooked up with some girl... I don't know. I feel like you're being unreasonable right now." My tone of voice sounded like, I was begging for him to understand, and I hated it. I sounded desperate, I was desperate.

"You fucked him, Liliana. You fucked Joey and he is a permanent fixture in my life. He is never going to not be here. Do you understand that? Can you even think for one second about how I feel? You think I could go on loving you and being around my family, knowing what I know? My brother was inside of you... you think I'm going to what?— Marry you or something after that, are you fucking delusional? There is no future between us."

I start to cry. A cry you rarely hear, the kind of cry that truly comes from a broken heart.

"No... please. Don't do this to me. I love you." I hold tighter to his shirt, but he quickly removes my hand.

"Lili, stop. Go home." He sharply, sighs.

"I don't want to go home." Tears soak my entire face.

"You have to go home." He answers.

"No, please." I beg him.

"Liliana, get in your car and go home. You have to, there's no other choice." He says.

"Nick..." His brown eyes finally look at me, but they weren't soft like most of the time, they were dark and cold.

"Lili, go." He opens my car door and ushers me in.

"Fine, Nick!" I scream at him, angrily. "If that's what you want, this was never meant to be anyway!"

*

When I get back to my apartment I feel sick. The guilty memories that my apartment now held, made it that much harder to be there. The entire place was just so empty, just as I felt inside. I was alone and it was quite and dark, I felt miserable.

I fall into my bed and scream into my pillow.

Second worse pain I'd ever feel was loosing him.

Song for this chapter: Billie Eilish- When the parties over.

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