Rivals 🌈 ✔

75 - Friendship Means Nothing

Motionless, Juice stood beside the hospital bed. He had no idea for how long. He just couldn't bring himself to move. He hadn't even touched his boyfriend yet.

If they hadn't told him this was Raine, he wouldn't have recognized him. His face was a dark, swollen mass—which he could only see through the breathing cap. There were bandages around his ears and neck, and his hands resting on the sheet were also wrapped in bandages.

Silent tears slid down his cheeks.

He wished they'd never met in this cursed hospital. Then Raine would just be sitting in the clubhouse right now, surrounded by his brothers. A game of darts, a round of cards, his arm wrapped around a cute girl. Instead, he was now on a ventilator, tube fed and mutilated by people Juice had not long ago considered family.

There was a good chance he would never wake up. That Juice would never see him smile, never hear his voice, that they would never hold each other again.

And even if he did come out of his coma, there could be a lot of complications. Paralysis. A mental disability. He might never be able to live a normal life again. And of course Juice would take care of him, but their relationship would change immensely. Maybe Raine would wish he had died now.

And maybe that's exactly what would happen.

Juice looked at Raine's bandaged hand. They said sometimes people in a coma were aware of their surroundings, right? Then he shouldn't be standing here like a puddle of misery. Instead, he had to be strong and give Raine the strength to not let go of life. He took a step forward until the hospital bed pressed against his waist. He placed his hand over his friend's. Through the bandage, he felt no trace of warmth. With trembling fingers, he slid up the sleeve of the hospital gown until he reached the tattooed skin halfway up his forearm. He stroked the ink before sliding his fingers around his arm. The skin was warm. Finally, Juice got the feeling that his friend was really still here. No matter how bad the prognosis might be: right now he was still here.

"Hey." Those three letters were enough to make him snap again. Before he could speak further, he had to let out a few sobs. When he regained a little control over his grief, he continued, "I don't know if you can hear me. But I promise you that I will stay with you. Until you wake up—or until you..." He pursed his lips. "Just until you wake up."

As he gently stroked Raine's skin with his thumb, he thought about what he wanted to say. A thousand apologies burned on his lips, but he knew Raine would wave them away. And saying them anyway when his friend couldn't object felt wrong.

"I'm not Son anymore," he said eventually. "Of course not, after what... what happened. But... but I wanted to say we're another step closer to our future together. You can even stay with the club. If you still want to. I don't think... I don't think they'd mind. They're all here, you know. In the waiting room. I know they've acted like assholes, but they're all here now. And they're all praying you'll wake up. At least now we... we don't have to wait another year before we get married." A faint smile showed itself at the corners of his mouth. "I can't wait. We should look for a nice wedding location soon. Maybe the forest, or the beach. Or maybe in the park where the benefit was held. Do you remember that day? How I ran away? I don't think I ever told you why. When you took off your shirt, I was so impressed by your upper body... and I was so relieved when you thought it was because of your tattoo." He chuckled softly, but the corners of his mouth sank back down when it remained awfully quiet. With a suppressed sigh, he bowed his head. Tears stung his eyes, but he fought them off successfully. "Well," he continued, because filling the silence by talking himself was better than the beeping of the devices. "I was shocked. That I was thinking like that about a man, wondering what it would be like to be tattooed by you. Stupid of course—it's not like it would hurt any less. But I still want a tattoo designed by. So when you wake up and we've found a home... you should design something. I'm sure..."

Juice immediately cut off his sentence as the door opened. He let go of his lover and stood up, grabbing for Chibs' weapon which he'd tucked behind his waistband. The sight of the leather kutte made his heart stop for a beat, until he saw the Mayan logo. 

Though this guest was not much more welcome. Esai walked into the room and cast a disdainful glance at Juice, as if he were a nurse he could dismiss with a nod.

"Your playtime is over, pendejo. I will stay and watch over him."

"I'm not going anywhere," Juice answered. To make that clear, he leaned over the bed and slipped his fingers around Raine's arm again.

Esai raised his eyebrows at the sight of that gestire. "Do you really think that's helpful"

Juice shrugged and turned his face towards Raine. "It helps me." He had no energy to start arguing with Esai. Even if the jerk put a gun to his head, he wouldn't leave.

The Mayan snorted.

Despite his intention not to get into a discussion, his skin prickled with irritation. "Then why are you here? To tell him he's cheated again, the moment he wakes up?"

"Apparently I need to come up with something better."

Juice clenched his jaw. Stay calm. "Whatever."

He didn't like to turn his back toward the man, but he didn't feel like looking at him either. He just wanted to pretend the jerk wasn't around at all. He didn't seem like a persistent type; after an hour he'd probably be gone.

Then Juice would slide the chair over to the bed and attempt to catch a few hours of sleep. Who knows, Raine might wake up in the meantime.

"You know it's your fault, don't you?" Apparently, Esai had no intention of waiting quietly. "If you hadn't been such a sissy, they never would have suspected you of betraying them."

"Someone put a tracker under my bike." Juice looked over his shoulder. "Was it you? Would you rather see your best friend dead than happy with a man?"

Esai let out a scornful sound. "I have yet to decide whether you are indeed a man." 

Juice took a deep breath. How on earth could this asshole be Raine's best friend? Shaking his head, he turned his face away. "I could say the same about you. You act like a teenager instead of someone who should be twice that age."

And just as one would expect from a teenager, Esai grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and yanked him towards him. The neck cut into his flesh and Juice pushed the man away.

"Was this supposed to prove me wrong? No wonder Raine is so done with you."

The Mayan's blue eyes spat fire. "You don't know anything about Raine and me."

"More than you know about us, so it seems." He straightened his shirt and cast the other a dark look. "Why are you here?"

"To make sure none of your little friends come and finish the job."

"And you can't do that from the hallway?"

"No. Fuck off, man. I have as much right to be here as you."

"Because you're going to marry him too?"

"Like that outweighs years of friendship."

"Yeah." Juice squeezed his fingers into a fist. "Friendship means nothing." He felt anger course through his body. "This day proved that."

Miraculously, those words were greeted by silence.

. . .

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