ruined, but is it?

don't know what to say

Moving his head up and down his pillow, rain Furrowed and un Furrowed his brow to then smack his lips, to slowly open his eyes to dart them about to make a face, wincing a bit, he then went from his side to his back to then make a harder face.
Why is my lower back hurting so much?
Rains eyes then started to widened a bit more to then turn his head to shake a bit, payu was to his other side to be fast asleep to his side facing rain without a pillow wall.
Rain then moved up a bit to quick to then place his lower hand to his back to wince to groan.
Payu gulped to then slowly open his eyes to look about to then eye up. Yawning, he then turned to his back to move his head to the side to look to the clock, to then go back to his side to then place a hand to rains chest to start to push him back down.
"Nn...too early... Lay.... Hey!"
Payu then landed to the other side of the bed to his ass to then wince, rain had moved has fast has he could to kick payu out to then land to his back to wince in pain.
Payu then got up to eye over rain to have his hand to his lower back to rub.
"What was that for?"
Rain turned his head to the side has he made the mistake of looking down, payu wasent wearing any clothes, he then moved about to place his blanket over him has he had seen he was naked has well.
"God! Get out of my bed you disgusting faggot!"
Payus eyes widened to scoff.
"Are you serious right now!? Your the one who.....ugh!"
Payu then went around to then leave in a bit of anger, rain then placed his hands to his eyes to groan.
Why did I! I don't even know! What the hell is wrong with me! I'm not into fucking men!
Rain then placed his arms about himself to go to his side with a sullen face has he was trying to make sense of this.
To the living room, payu found his bag to then grab his clothes to then go to the couch to lay to his back to wrap his arms about himself to eye up.
I should have listened to myself and stopped this! What is happening Right now is much my fault has it is rains. This never should have happened again.
Payu then placed his hands to his eyes.
The next day, rain was over his sink to be brushing his teeth with a long face to then spit to look himself over.
Sighing, he then placed his tooth brush away to then turn to leave, he was starting to get hungry.
Leaving his room, he then looked about, to then eye the kitchen, he started to breathe heavily has he didn't see payu.
Rain took in a deep breathe to then start to go about, he then went to the weapon room to then open the door to eye the back corner to actually breathe out in relief.
He saw payu to the corner to be sitting to have his eyes to a gun to be cleaning it.
Rain took in a deep breathe.
"Um...."
Payu stopped to dart his eyes about.
"What do you want rain?"
Rain hung his head to look to the floor.
"Mm.... Breakfest?"
Payu rolled his eyes.
"Couldn't go back to sleep, so made breakfest early, it's in the fridge."
Payu then looked back to the gun to finish cleaning it.
Rain looked about payu.
"Um..... We usually...."
Payu took in a deep breathe to then slowly look to rain to tilt his head to the side without much of an expression.
"Rain....... You made me promise not to let my hands on you again then last night you jumped me. You know....I don't usually cuss but.... What the fuck!?"
Rain made a hard face to then grit his teeth has he continued to eye the floor.
Payu Darted his eyes over rain to sign has silence filled the space between them.
"Rain?"
Rain turned his head to the side a bit.
"Rain..... Are you.... Really straight?"
Rain snapped his head up to look to payu.
"I am not a disgusting queer like you!"
Payu narrowed his eyes.
"Then why!"
Rain made a long face to then look back to the floor to shrug his shoulders.
Payu rolled his eyes to then go back to the gun to continue to clean it.
"This really isn't fair rain."
"I.... Know...."
"Then why did you do that?"
"I.... Really don't know..... It was a huge mistake."
Payu shook his head to continue to clean his gun.
"Go away rain."
Rain looked back to payu.
"But..... We usually...."
"I don't want to eat with you. Can barely stand to be any where near you. You say such hurtful and hateful things to me then do what you did and can't tell me why you did it. This is so not fair. Just go away!" Payu said in a stern voice.
Rain took in a deep breathe to then turn to place his hand to the door nob to eye the action.
"I.... Really don't know what to say payu."
"Just go away."
Rain then went forward to then close the door behind him to then place his back to the door to look forward.
I really don't know what to say about this. Payu was having those horrible nightmares like I used to about my parents, then the way he told me what he did for me to make then go away......I don't know why I jumped him like that...... Just......I couldn't think of any other way to tell him.... Thank you.....
Rain then placed his hand to his forehead to eye the floor.
You didn't need to sleep with him though. You did make him promise you then you did that. What in the fuck is wrong with you! You really are a horrible person.
Rain signed to then go straight to the couch to lay to his side to have a pillow to his body to squeeze to himself to look forward to then squeeze his eyes tightly shut to go without breakfest, rain couldn't help but punish himself for what he did to payu.