Roses & Ruin

Chapter 65 (Lexi)

         "It's one thing to send me off to Italy to live out my pregnancy. It's another to sell me off like cattle" she bit back. I laughed which threw her off. "I agree," I told her. She seemed surprised by that. "I have a little sister" I found myself coming out and saying.

What the hell is it with me and Giana? I always end up telling her way more than I ever told anyone else. I don't even know this chick. I'm not even sure if I like her, actually. "They gave me a choice. Just a bad one. Me or her. She's 18, a virgin, and clueless about the world. She's been sheltered her whole life. They'd eat her alive" I told her. Giana considered my words. 

"Yeah, your dad really is a dick, huh?" She didn't pity me. I was glad.

        "How long does that kid take to eat?" I just moved things right along. There wasn't much more to say on the other topic. Giana looked down at her breast instead of me. "Depends" is all she said. "Is it weird?" I asked. She looked up so I clarified. 

"Having to take care of a little hungry pooping human all the time? Having him latched on to your tit like that...is it weird?" I asked again.

"It's really frickin scary. Like, he's mine. I have to just constantly think about him and care for him and they always blame the mothers if a kid turns out all fucked up. I don't wanna fuck my kid up" she blabbered out. I scratched my head. 

"And the tit thing?" I asked her. "It kinda hurts, but you get used to it" she waved that part off. "Does Alessandro help you?" I asked. I was surprised by the genuine smile she gave.

    "Yeah, he's great actually. He spends time with him. He asked me to teach him how to change his diaper and how to wash him properly and feed him and everything. He talks to him when it's his night to put him down to sleep. I wasn't...I didn't expect this. Ale and I were never particularly close. This was totally a fluke pregnancy as you know, but yeah, I don't know. We're doing okay together" she told me.

"Romantically?" I smirked. She just sounded like she was head over heels for him in that speech of hers. She scoffed and waved me off. "No, Lexi, not romantically. I'm talking about co-parenting" she huffed her natural attitude. 

"Boring" I gave her a thumbs down. She looked like she might have been biting her cheek to hide actual amusement.

        When there was a knock on the shut door I excused myself a second and popped my head out just a crack so Giana wouldn't be exposed. It was Magdelena. "Miss Petrov...you-father ask for you to hurry" she said to me in a hushed quick tone. He was probably snarling in the poor woman's ear when the guests weren't looking.

"Well Mags, I don't have time to teach him the complete cycle of life, but could you explain to him that baby's need time when, ya know, eating. We aren't playing dress up in here. We'll be done when Matteo's done" I told her. 

She knew I was being sarcastic with her. They brought Magdalena with them from the house in Russia. I've known her for a few years now.

The woman pressed her lips together and gave me the 'yeah right you relay that message yourself' face. I peeked back at Giana and to Magdelena again. "Tell him I'll be right there" I gave her a response I knew she'd actually carry out. "Good, good" she waved her hands for me to go back inside and she started down the hall.

"This dinner is gonna be awful by the way. You know that right?" I asked Giana as I shut the door. "Oh absolutely."

-

        Dinner went as follows. Vitaly was at the head of the table. At the opposite end was Mr. Rizzo. Dmitriy was at my fathers right, Andrei at his left, me next to Andrei, Giana next to me, Enzo across from me/Giana, Anthony at Mr. Rizzo's right, and Mrs. Rizzo at his left. The fucking intercontinental brady bunch.

And the conversation was too polite and very unnatural. We stayed on neutral subjects, we avoided business or any uncomfortable truths. Everyone was mostly on their best behavior. I made a comment or two, but so did Andrei, and my father kicked us both under the table. Or Dmitriy did. 

A foot kicked me, that's all I'll say.

Anthony didn't look at me once. I had to constantly remind myself not to look at him. And the most favored topic of the evening was me and Enzo. It was awful. I don't know how Anthony felt about it, but I hated every second of it. 

        Comments like, "When these two get married blah blah," and "oh Aleksandra you don't have any nieces or nephews yet, huh? Well, Matteo will be your nephew soon enough. Are you good with kids? I'm sure Daisy will love you. But you're a little young for her to be calling you mama. Oh in time, in time you'll have your own" followed by laughter. That was more Mrs. Rizzo's focus.

The men made comments about timelines. "When do you think you'll get the ring?", "There should be a formal announcement, so don't wait too long", "does a fall wedding sound nice?"...Thank god I wasn't armed tonight or I would've shot myself. And as I've proven I have good aim.

         After the meal and the dessert the men went for cigars and left us tender, delicate women to our chatting. Mrs. Rizzo hasn't exposed her full personality yet, but I hope she isn't a bitch. She started talking about babies again and Giana snapped her head over to her. "Ma, stop, jesus. You know this marriage isn't real right?"

Mrs. Rizzo stiffened at her daughter's outburst and started folding and refolding her napkin.

"Giana, how could you? That's a horrible thing to say" she quietly scolded her daughter. "No, it's okay Mrs. Rizzo. She's absolutely right" I chuckled. It didn't make Mrs. Rizzo feel any better. If anything she started smoothing out, and undoing, and refolding the napkin again. Me and Giana shared a silent glance.

        "Would you like to help plan the wedding, Mrs. Rizzo?" I decided to just follow her lead and ignore the uncomfortable truth. The woman's head snapped up and she swelled with some emotion. "Oh, I would love to, Aleksandra. That'd be lovely. Thank you" she smiled. Neither of her children are married, so this is the first wedding.

Something soured in my gut when the thought fully settled over me. My mother won't be at my wedding. Not that I would ever want her at a wedding like this one. My mom fought for this exact thing to never happen, but even if I managed to worm my way out of this contract marriage...if I found a man I love and wanna commit a piece of paper too...my mom wouldn't be at my wedding.

        She can't bug me about color schemes, or cry when I find a wedding dress. She can't fawn over venues with Mrs. Rizzo. She can't put in for overtime just to make a little extra cash so she could offer to pitch in as she always had when it was just her and I.

Mom put in over time when she wanted me to attend my first high school dance, and she wanted to get me a dress I didn't already own. A formal dress. I told her over and over again that I didn't care about that. But then I realized it was her who cared about that. So I went to my ridiculous school dance in the formal dress my mother proudly bought me.

That's the vibe I'm getting with Mrs. Rizzo here. 

It's not about me wanting to plan a wedding. It's not about it being a fake wedding. This is a mother wanting to watch her only son get hitched in that beautiful venue I'm sure she'll fawn over, while I'm in a gown she teared up at when coming out of the dressing room.

        "Lexi?" I heard Giana's voice in the distance of my overrun mind. I snapped out of it and noticed the odd expressions on the women's faces. I cleared my throat and blinked the heat in my eyes away. "I'm sure you're a lot better at it than I am," I gave a fake awkward laugh to Mrs. Rizzo. 

"And your mother?" Mrs. Rizzo asked. Giana practically gasped and muttered something out in Italian very quickly. Mrs. Rizzo covered her mouth with her hand and she looked mortified. 

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I didn't know...I'm a fool" she apologized profusely. "No, it's okay" I waved her off. The sour taste only got stronger in the back of my mouth. I wasn't sure who Mrs. Rizzo was as a person, as I said before. I couldn't tell if she was a bitch, entitled, disingenuous, or what. But when she opened her mouth this last time I knew her character for sure.

"Aleksandra, I'd be honored to step in where a mother should. We can do everything together...in your mother's honor." And just like that I liked Mrs. Rizzo.