The Forbidden Path

Chapter 10

She looked really tired. Racheal's heart ached but she kept quiet. Her heart always flooded with warmth when she saw how close and love her parents were. They needed no one and had built a world around themselves. So her troubled marriage was even more painful for Racheal when she compared it with her parents. She had grown up watching them. Racheal was a total home body and she had always longed for a loving partner and a beautiful family of her own someday. Since her upbringing had been in a closed and warm family environment that was what she had dreamed of. But it was just the opposite in her case. But Racheal had hoped it would work out someday and she had tried her optimum best. Though her bestfriend had suggested her to terminate the marriage many times, Racheal had decided to stick in the marriage as she was too scared to even imagine a life without a father for her daughter.

Since she was raised in a loving family, the very thought of living a single life took the life out of her. Apparently she was just holding on to the false beliefs of security which had been ingrained in her subconscious state of mind. She knew she would be happier without the drama or her husband but something in her held her back. And she hated herself for it every day. Her husband had made her believe that the consequences of their divorce would be a traumatic experience for her and her daughter. So she believed that she was solely responsible for the disintegration of their marriage. Though it was far from the truth, Racheal was quietly blaming herself for everything.

She had begun to lose her confidence, her self esteem and the recent traumatic events unfolding one after the other had made Racheal helpless and lonely. At times like this, she desperately longed for the man of her dreams. The faceless man who she was so familiar in her soul level .Lately she thought of her him more than she thought of any one. She longed to be loved as much as her mother was loved. She yearned for the warmth in the relationship. She leaned back on the sofa once more and thought of her daughter. She wondered if she was being looked after well. If her father was spending enough time with her. She felt guilty and sad. Inhaling a deep breath she shifted her focus to her breathing trying to calm her frazzled nerves. She had started practicing meditation for sometime and it had helped her tremendously. 

She couldn't believe that life could be so unfair. And she never knew she was so strong as she kept pushing herself to endure more without breaking down. One problem kept sprouting after the other. Calmness swept over her body as she quietly inhaled and exhaled relaxing her tense muscles."Go and get some thing to eat." She heard her father telling her. Racheal opened her eyes abruptly and looked at her father.She got up and walked towards the table. Picking up a slice of sandwich and some fruits, she reached for the guava juice. She wasn't too keen on eating but she needed some fuel for her body. She had a long day ahead. She turned back without looking and almost bumped into a man. "Sorry, she said without a second glance. But she could feel a certain energy around him.So she stopped and turned around to look at him. He was facing his back at her as if intentionally.

He stood there with his head bent maybe eating from his plate or just standing there for the sake of it. She could feel him smiling. It felt as if he had eyes on his back and was looking at her. It felt as if she saw an aura around him. A glow which sort of attracted her to him. She was perplexed. He walked towards the counter to fill his glass from the decanter. The whole time it felt as if his eyes were on her watching her. Out of curiosity and as if in a spell, she walked towards the counter as she wanted to see his face. She pretended to take the fruits and watched him studying him closely She studied his hair, his face his hands and his fingers and nails as he intentionally slowed the tap. She could feel a familiarity.

An unknown feeling as if she had seen him some where or known him for some time. He looked at her without a smile and as their eyes met, she could feel herself being sucked into his pupil. It was scary, the magnetic feeling as if she was passing through the tunnel through is iris. She pulled back and shook her head as it was an unusual experience. He stood there, square shoulders, tall, handsome with a solemn experience on his face. He was studying her intently too. Watching her reaction. She didn't smile and said sorry and slid past him. He noded and stood aside and said." No worries." She gasped a breath of air and almost chocked realizing that the man of her dream had finally got his face. She remembered the same, features and the feeling.

The hair, the faint face she was trying to match with every man she came across. It was a deja vu experience. It rattled her senses and excited her at the same time. But it wasn't an attraction she had experienced before. It felt comfortable, calm and it felt like she had come home to some one she had always known. He didn't smile but she could feel his excitement and his smile as he walked back to the other hall.